After what happened yesterday, my mood was incredibly different when I woke up. I was excited about nothing, but my stomach was filled with butterfly's. I was just excited. Maybe that had something to do with the whole kissing Devon thing. It still hasn't settled in. I kissed Devon. I did more then kiss him. I made out with him. The guy I thought would never look my way and made out with me on his bed. If I died today I would be happy.

I woke up in my bed bundled up in the corner. I slept with many blankets on my bed because it felt like there was someone there with me. It was the only way I was able to sleep. It started because my mother would always lay in bed with me, but after her death the spot was never filled.

The sun was covered by the thick gray clouds. It was going to be a staying in day. I opted to skip breakfast like I did most mornings. Instead I decided to stay in my room and draw in the comfort of my bed. My sketchbook was full of little doodles I did when I got bored. I thought that they looked shitty but it wasn't serious so I didn't care. To set the depressing fall mood I go over to my vinyl shelf and skim the titles until I find the perfect album. blue banisters . I set the black disc onto my dads old record play and press play.

I get comfortable on my bed as the music fills the room. My pencil moves in fast motions on the page creating pictures. Just as the first side of music ends I get a text one my phone. I drop the pencil and pick up my buzzing phone. The texts where from Devon.

Good morning

❤️❤️❤️

I miss you

🫶🫶

My cheeks flushed red thinking about how he took the time out of his day to say good morning. That's what I liked about him.

❤️

I'm so bored rn

❤️

Im at the park again with Junior

and his friends😒😒

Idk why they even asked me to come

I only came cuz I didn't want to look

like an idiot when I didn't come

❤️

What would you say if decided

to leave everyone and come over

to kiss you??

❤️

YESSS!!!!!!!

IM ON MY WAY RN

I didn't hear anything else from him except that he was coming over. The park isn't that far from my house so I wouldn't have enough time to tidy up my room so I just let it be. Same thing with my clothes. I was still dressed in my pajamas.

———

He arrived at my house within a few minutes as the park was only a few blocks away. He texted me that he was outside and I told him that I would sneak him in from the back. I didn't think my dad would want company at the moment.

I walk down stairs to the empty floor of the house. Dads probably upstairs. Devon's waiting outside the front door where I let him in.

"Hey" he greets. I just smile and hug him. For a second I debated just kissing him outside, but I couldn't risk anyone seeing and my dad finding out about Devon. He knows I'm gay, i think, but I couldn't risk him knowing that I'm sneaking around with a boy.

I bring Devon inside and up to my room. He inspects it, looking at all the papers and posters covering my walls, all the random clutter on my shelf's that I can't part with, and the excessive amount of blankets on my bed. "My rooms a bit drafty at night" i tell him.

"I like your room" he said. I was happy to hear that. I thought he was weirded out by it, especially by the giant mountain of doll limbs in the middle of the room. "Its cool" he lays down on my bed and hits his arm on a stray Barbie. He must be regretting his decision right now.

"Sorry, i didn't get to clean." I said awkwardly. "My cat most've left it"

"Is it for that?" He asked referring to the sculpture. "I think it's cool". He liked that word. That or he didn't have anything else to say and wanted to leave.

"Really?" I ask timidly.

"Yeah, I think that it's nice you have something you like to do." He responded. I laid next to him on the bed. He put his fingers in my hair and we said nothing. "I wanna kiss you right now" he broke the silence. I smiled and kicked the door to my room close. He rolled over on his back and I on him. I kissed him for what felt like an eternity. I the as so happy.