It has officially been thirty days since I last saw Jennie. A whole month without contact I have had to withstand and neither one of us has made even the slightest effort to correct that. A couple of days after our fourth session, she called to confirm our next appointment, which is customary since up until then I had been on a weekly schedule. I told her I wasn't sure I wanted to continue seeing her and she didn't argue. We left it at that. Thirty days ago...

Of course, I was lying. I absolutely wanted to keep seeing no matter what the circumstances, but she had called on a particularly bad day for me. I spoke on impulse, hoping she might change her mind about the whole 'strictly professional' deal and tell me how she really felt. She didn't. Instead, she etched my name off of her client list and went about her business.

I'm beginning to realize that her less than ideal response may have been my fault. You see, after our fourth session, it was me who baled first. Once my breathing was under control, I got up, dressed myself, and left. I didn't say two words to her, not even a goodbye. I remember exiting her office feeling so proud and accomplished. When I opened her office door and made my way into the waiting room, her assistant had an incredulous look on her face. She probably noticed the zipper in the back of my dress was only halfway done and my hair and makeup were a complete mess. She called for me before I could leave the building and I turned around with a slick smile on my face.

"Is everything okay?" She had asked, taking in my unkempt appearance for what it was.

"Everything is fine. Thank you," I assured her with a bright smile.

She nodded in return and I left. There was nothing more to be said. Of course, I didn't know that leaving her office that day meant possibly never seeing her again. Had I known that fact, I wouldn't have left in such a haste. I didn't mean to be rude to Jennie or make her feel like she didn't matter to me. I just wanted her to her to be honest with me so I wouldn't have to be. Truthfully, these last thirty days have been boring without her. A part of me felt like whenever she was around, we were breaking the rules, living on the edge. It was fun and dangerous. She made me feel alive.

This revelation came with some hiccups, though. My life has quickly become a mirror image of what it used to be before I met Jennie. I stopped pleasuring myself altogether. The act, itself, became pointless. If I couldn't think about her while I did it- which I felt wrong doing after I had practically shut her out of my life- then I couldn't bring myself to do it at all. I stopped going enjoying myself with Chae and Jisoo, as well.

Chae has tried on several occasions to get me to come out with her and I gave in once or twice, but I didn't feel that same freedom as I did before. I occupied a space at the bar for the entire night and when she came to find me and get me to dance with her and some guys she had met, I waved her off. I didn't want anyone else's hands on me, because Jennie's were the only ones I craved. I didn't want to dance because the simple action of gyrating my hips reminded me of my nights with her. Everything was chalked up to her.

Jisoo unnie only started talking to me again once she found out I had stopped seeing Jennie. I pretended to be okay with that fact and let her lecture me about how stupid I was being and I even agreed with her. The three of us continued having our movie nights whenever we could find the time and my routine was officially back to normal.

Every day was the same tedious process it had been before Jennie. I would wake up, go to work, come home, make dinner, watch television, go to sleep, and start over the next day. I honestly cannot fathom how I dealt with this unimaginably boring lifestyle before. I've come to realize how much I hate living in routine. I hate knowing what to expect every single day. Literally, the most exciting thing that has happened to me all month was when my boss called me one morning to tell me he was short-staffed. He called on my day off which would have consisted of me sitting on the couch and watching TV all day. Instead, I spent that day at work, taking orders and serving food... Very exciting.

Today will be no different.

I finish my shower this morning and apply the least bit of makeup to my face, making me at least somewhat presentable. I slip casual top over my head, grab my keys. Before I know it, I'm back at work. I clock in and take my place behind the register, greeting my favorite coworker as I do so. He works in the kitchen just behind me and there's a convenient opening that separates us, allowing him to hand me the food once it's been prepared. This makes my hob somewhat bearable as I can turn around and talk to him whenever we have some down time.

A few hours in, after the breakfast rush, Bambam and I get a chance to talk. He high fives me in greeting and I smile, thankful to have someone to keep me entertained.

"How was your weekend, noona?" Bam asks, that nickname ringing in my ears.

I post behind the register, making sure no new customers have arrived before turning around to face him. "Same old," I reply. Bambam doesn't know anything about Jennie. I neglected to tell him about her purposely, knowing I would never hear the end of it.

Other than that aspect of my life, he knows everything about me. Probably more than Chae and Jisoo unnie.

He slings a filthy white hand towel over his shoulder and frowns at me. "You need to live a little! Go out and... I don't know, do whatever it is that people like you do..." He teases, still seeing me as the friend who doesn't get laid.

I roll my eyes at him, smiling in secret agreement. "There's nothing to do, Bam... Every weekend is the same and that is how my life will be until I die. Predictable and monotonous."

He shakes his head at the thought, probably thinking about how pathetic I am. "Your girlfriends are really slacking, noona. Shouldn't they be encouraging you to do shit? Isn't that what girls do?"

I think back to the last time they encouraged me to do something. I don't respond to him, as my mind has wandered back to thoughts of Jennie. The more I think about her, the more I realize I didn't really know her. I didn't know much of anything about her personality, or childhood, or her favorite colors and type of music... I only knew her touch, and her laugh, and the way her eyes changed color when she was turned on. I didn't know much, but I couldn't escape the realization that I wanted to know more about her.

I'm pulled from my lingering thoughts when Bam speaks up. "Are you and Jisoo unnie even talking again?" He prods. I told him several weeks ago that she and I weren't on the best of terms, but I didn't mention why. He obviously doesn't know that it has anything to do with Jennie.

"Umm, yeah... We've been talking more lately. She's still being kind of weird around me, though," I tell him, resting my elbows on the back counter.

A questionable smile presents itself on his face as he rests his elbows on the divider. "This doesn't sound like your regular boring self, noona. What choices did you make that Jisoo unnie, of all people, didn't agree with?" Oh no.

I avoid his eyes at all costs, staring down at my hands instead as I try to come up with a reasonable lie. Anything. Anything at all to deflect from what actually happened...

He practically yells, causing the few seated customers behind me to turn their attention to us.

I quickly bring my hands to his mouth to shush him and he leans away from them, a huge smile on his face. "You'd better fess up right now, Lisa! What have you gotten up to?"

I still can't bear the thought of telling him the whole story, so I sigh in defeat and keep my response as simple as possible. "I met someone," I whisper, leaning into the divider.

His eyes widen in shock at my words. He knows that I've never dated anyone. I've never even admitted to crushing on someone when we were in high school. Until this point, Bam wasn't even aware that I was capable of having feelings for someone that went beyond platonic.

"You what?!" He whispers, a bit too loud. "You met someone and you didn't tell me?! Seriously, noona, what the hell?"

I shush him again and look behind to make sure we haven't caught the crowd's attention again. "It's not like that, all right? Chaeyoung and Jisoo kind of... Introduced me to someone and... I don't know... I didn't not like them..." I say evasively

He states with a smug grin. "When we go on lunch you are telling me every bloody detail, you hear me?"

I nod silently in defeat and stare up at him when his eyes widen yet again. "Hey! You made it!" He shouts behind me, an everlasting grin on his face.

I turn around and am immediately met with the most striking pair of eyes. Jennie...

When she realizes that it's me standing behind the register, her smile falters. She continues making her way up to us, however, putting on her best face for Bam. How do they even know each other? He's never once mentioned being friends with a sex therapist and he's upset with me for omitting one little detail from my life?

All I can hope for is that Jennie doesn't let him know that she knows me. I was going to tell him at least a little bit about what's happened to me over the last month and a half but I certainly wasn't going to mention her name...

"Hey, Bam," She greets offering a fake smile. She then looks to me a he begins to pull her apron off. "Hi, Lisa... I didn't know you worked here."

Shit. It doesn't take long for Bam to hear and he immediately looks between both of us in confusion, . "How do you two know each other?" He asks

I look to Jennie, unsure of which of us is going to answer. She opens her mouth to say something but I quickly interject. "We... We met a while ago at, um..." I stumble over my words, seeing the look of doubt on Bam's face.

"We took a yoga class together," Jennie lies confidently, watching as Bam nods in approval. "What about you two?" She asks gesturing between he and I.

"Oh, noona and I go way back," Bam laughs." Back to emo hair and puberty. Good times."

I roll my eyes at the memories while Bam recalls a few, thoroughly entertaining Jennie. I keep silent through his stories, trying hard not to stare at her as her eyes are fixed on my friend.

My heart is jumping in my chest and I can feel my face heating up. She's actually here. In front of me... Making casual conversation with one of my best friends.

I can hardly contain my thoughts at this point. They keep flashing back to the nights she and I spent together in rapid succession. Fleeting moments of my muffled moans and her eyes boring into mine, the obscenities I whispered as her hands wandered shamelessly around my body, the tender kisses we shared as our sweating figures fell against each other.

"Right, noona?" Bam smacks the back of my shoulder, pulling me from my thoughts yet again.

"What?" I respond, having been completely oblivious whatever statement he just made about me.

"I said you were, like, a serial dater in high school. Total slut..." He jokes, causing Jennie to laugh. The sound is so refreshing.

I turn to her and smile, shaking my head in disagreement.

Bam eventually takes her order and tells her to find a seat somewhere. She picks a spot towards the entrance where she is directly in my line of s ight, sitting alone in a booth and never taking her eyes off of me. She looks as if she's trying to tell me something with her penetrating gaze and I have to force myself to look away when another customer approaches the register.

I take the man's order as Bam finally emerges from the kitchen to serve Jennie's dish, a baked potato with a side of fries and glass of wine. I hear Bam telling her something as he's over there. He wants to meet up with her after work and check out this club on the other side of town. She nods enthusiastically in agreement and I suddenly see both of them looking over at me.

"It's not really her thing," Bam says to her, sticking his tongue out at me.

I pretend as if I wasn't just listening to them and busy myself behind the register. I look up at the clock and realize I'm just a few minutes away from going on my ten-minute break, which I get at ten o' clock, before I work another three hours until I get to go on my lunch break. I really just need to get out of here and collect myself.

"You'll have to ask her. You'll probably have better luck than I." I hear Bam say, waving goodbye to her as he heads back to the kitchen. Before he rounds the corner, he stops to ask me something.

"Hey, Lisa, when do you go on break?"

I look back at the clock. "Now," I tell him, pulling off my apron. "Why?"

"Jennie wants to ask you something," He smiles playfully.

With that, he turns the corner and retreats back into the kitchen.

I look over at Jennie who is standing now, making her way over to me. I feel my heart doing that thing again, where it stops beating at a normal rate. She approaches me and lays her hands on the counter.

"Can we talk?" She asks hopefully, leaning into the counter.

"Somewhere private?" She looks as if she's afraid that I'm going to say 'no' to her, so I nod earnestly after a moment and hang my apron on the hook behind me.

A/N: Ahhhhh! Finally! This update didn't took long though! You guys are absolutely amazing. For waiting and all! Watch out for more.

Ps: I just passed the board exam! Now have time to update this chap! :)