When I was working in my office, I had realised that I'd gotten my periods, so I had to rush home without Rohan.

Now, as I sat in my room, studying the file in my hand, I groaned in frustration for the tenth time before I got up and stretched my sore muscles.

"Fucking cramps!" I whined and laid down on the bed in foetal position.

"Hey," Rohan greeted and I immediately sat properly.

"Hey," I said.

"You are dinner? Or you weren't hungry because mom said you didn't come down to eat dinner, now that you're on your periods, you need to eat more proteins! She said maybe you were waiting for me to come home..." He trailed off with a goofy smile on his face.

"Don't boost your ego Rohan, I was busy with the file and forgot about dinner," I said as I looked down at the file.

I heard a sigh and approaching footsteps.

"You know, sometimes it's okay to tell the truth," he said and I looked up at him before narrowing my eyes.

"The truth?"

"Sonia had told me how beneath all that hard nature, there is a romantic baby, and also how you always loved that your parents always ate together, even when he was late, she would wait for him,"

"I may be a romantic baby but I sure as hell didn't wait for you," I said.

"Sure Sanjana, whatever helps you sleep at night," he said with a lopsided smile before walking inside the closet.

"Fucking Sonia!" I muttered and walked downstairs to the dining room.

Mom and dad were in the living room eating dessert while they watched TV so I heated up the dinner and served two plates. Rohan grinned as he sat down opposite me and started eating food while he discussed with me his latest case that he was supervising.

"I also want a love like you and mom," I'd told dad.

"You will surely find one," he'd told me, his eyes twinkling as he had stared at mom.

"Sanjana,"

"Earth to Sanjana," Rohan's voice brought me back from my present self.

"Yeah,"

"Where were you lost?"

"Nowhere," I mumbled as I focused on eating the rice.

As we were done, Rohan washed the dishes since he insisted on doing it and I sat on the kitchen stool watching me, to give him company.

"You want to eat ice-cream?" I offered as I pulled open the fridge and served myself some chocolate ice-cream.

"No, I don't like ice-cream," he said as he wiped his hands on his t-shirt.

"Haha, how funny,"

"I'm serious Sanjana, I really don't like ice-cream,"

"Oh my goodness," I whispered as I shook my head.

I couldn't believe this.

"I don't hate it, I just dislike it, there's a difference Sanjana," he said with a smile before walking out of the kitchen.

I finished eating the ice-cream and by the time I'd reached my room, my cramps had increased top-notch. I whimpered and slid into the blankets and curled up in a ball.

"Sanjana,"

"What?"

"Here,"

"Hmm?"

I turned to find him standing near the edge of the bed with a hot water pack in his hand.

"Thank you," I said as I took it in my hands.

Oh but where do I put it, my back was hurting, my lower stomach was aching, everything was aching.

"Do you want a massage?" He asked hesitantly.

"Why? So you could find excuses to touch me?" I snapped but regretted those words.

Fuck my mood swings and my trust issues.

"I wasn't-- mom could help,"

"Rohan I'm sorry, this pain and my mood swings are going to be the death of me,"

"Hey, don't be sorry for being yourself, I know even without the pain and mood swings I would have received the same answer, sometime I forget that you have your own issues and we can't hurry into a relationship," he said.

I stuffed my face in the pillow as tears welled in my eyes.

"Did I say something that hurt you?"

"No, I'm just--"

"Are you in pain?"

"No god fucking dammit, I'm overwhelmed by your understanding nature," I snapped.

"Oh, should I call mom?"

"No, she must be asleep and you sleep too, I have a habit of tolerating this pain, I'll sleep in no time,"

"Okay, good night Sanjana, I hope you sleep well,"

"You too," I said softly, I wasn't sure if he'd heard it or not.

°

"Sanjana,"

"Yes mom?"

"He'll come home late today, it's her death anniversary, you can go and sleep," she said as she smiled sadly.

"Oh, it's okay, I'll wait for him,"

"I don't want to shock you dear, he'll just--" before she could finish her sentence, in walked Rohan.

He was crying as he took a sip from his bottle, he was drunk.

"She--she left me mom," he cried as he walked towards mom.

He stumbled upon himself and was about to fall down but mom and I held him.

"Oh look it's my beautiful wife and my mom," he said as he grinned at me with a boyish grin.

"Rohan! What is this behaviour? You'd promised me not to drink," mom scolded him and he pouted as he started crying.

"But I miss her and now he's gonna get death penalty, and I miss her even more," he said and started crying.

"Sweetheart, she wouldn't want you to behave like this,"

"You don't know what she would have wanted or not!" He shouted and I stumbled as I stared at him wide eyed.

He looked at me and smiled sadly.

"Sorry wifey, I didn't want to scare you," he pouted before he closed his eyes.

"Sanjana, help me get this grasshole to your room," mom said with difficulty as Rohan put all her weight on her.

"Y-yes mom," I said as I put an arm around him.

"Ooo mom, she's touching me," he said and I ignored him as we dragged him to our room.

We put him down on the bed and mom breathed out heavily.

"Goodness! He's so fat,"

"I'm not fat I have muscles see," he whined as he raised his arm and tried to flex his muscles.

"Sanjana, tell mom that I have muscles and I'm not fat,"

"Mom--"

"I'll got get Sunil so he can help him get changed," she said before leaving us alone.

As Sunil walked in, mom called me outside.

"Will you be comfortable with him tonight?"

"Hmm?"

"He's drunk and I know because he's my son he won't do anything, but I want you to be comfortable,"

"I think I'll be comfortable,"

"Sanjana, I want Sanjana!" Rohan whined as Sunil opened the door.

"If at any point of time you are uncomfortable, come wake me up and I'll stay with Rohan for the night while you can rest in the guest room okay?"

"Okay, thank you so much mom,"

"Mom, stop stealing my wife away!" He whined.

"I'm not stealing her,"

"Goodnight mom," I said.

"Goodnight sweetheart," she said as Sunil and her walked away.

I walked inside the room and sat on the sofa.

"You know, Tanya would have loved you,"

"Mhmm,"

"You would have loved her too, it's not fair God took her away from me," he said as tears welled in his eyes.

"And you also don't love me, you're always pushing me away, sometimes you're such a meanie to me, but I swear I'm trying to understand you, I'm trying you can see right?" He asked as he looked at me innocently.

When I didn't answer, he shook his head and started crying.

"I want Tanya, no one loves me in this world, Tanya was the only one who loved me,"

"Mom loves you, dad loves you, Sunil loves you,"

"No, Sunil loves Monu, Sunil doesn't love me,"

I don't say anything, don't even ask who Monu is as he stares at me.

"Sanjana,"

"Yes?"

"Can you come and sit next to me? I swear I'll not do anything, I just want to hold your hand, it makes me happy,"

"I--"

"Please,"

"Rohan,"

"Only pinky fingers okay? But please don't deny this, and please don't be scared of me," he said.

"Fine,"

I walked closer to him, sat on the floor and held his hand up as I put my hand in his.

"That's better," he said as he put his head on the pillow and closed his eyes.

"I missed you my bed," he said as he kissed his pillow.

I felt guilty as I stared at him. The sofa must have been really uncomfortable.

"You know everyone has their love language, even though I come off as a closed person, my love language is touch," he said as he tightened his hold around mine.

I nodded my head and hum in agreement because I don't know what to tell him.

"You know, the first time we met you told you would do anything for your parents happiness, but that shouldn't be the case, Tanya had said the same thing and look where she ended up, you are lucky I'm not one of those asshole,"

"I know,"

"And you don't owe your parents anything you know," he said as he stared at me.

"I know I don't," I said as I closed my eyes and rested my head against the bedside table.

Why did I decide to sit on the floor?

"But you still feel like you do, you shouldn't..." He trailed off and after some time, I heard soft snores.

______________________________

How was this update?

I know I am very late today, it's just that I was watching 3 idiots and then that ended at 11:30ish and I started writing but something was going around in my vicinity so was busy watching that but hey, here I am.

Also, hey it's raining here and I'm so happy. Rains and winters are my faves, what about y'all?