I've been on my best behavior at school after the guidance counselor talked to me. It was scary to think that the school might start poking into my home life. I have to be as inconspicuous as possible by doing all my assignments to the best of my ability, arriving at school early -but not too early- and attending all classes everyday. With Melissa gone, I don't have to worry too much about skipping school to take care of her or myself so it's easier keeping up appearances.

I try to dodge Dustin when I see him approach me in the hallway, but I don't get far.

"I know you're avoiding me."

Caught red handed but I don't try to defend myself. I was beyond embarrassed after breaking down in his arms the other day and now I had other things lurking in the shadows that I needed to deal with.

Dustin doesn't say anything else. Instead, he happily chats away about Dorito and the way the dopey dog dug up Miriam's peonies. He goes on about how Miriam yelled at him then five minutes later gave him a hug because she felt bad.

"Big ole softy that one," he jokes.

I smile slightly.

Dustin bids me goodbye as we part ways to class and I take the time to get my mind together.

Most of the time for lunch, I hide out somewhere (usually the library) and wait it out. Today is no different. I'm not a big reader but libraries are a safe haven. A place I can be for free without judgement.

The last person I expect to see sitting alone in the library is Alice. She's perched in a corner, her body slouched over. It's not easy to see that it's her since she's wearing a hoodie and jeans as opposed to her usual attire but I would recognize her in a garbage bag. She has been bullying me for the better part of high school.

I don't approach her. I have no reason for it so I sit on the opposite side of the room to look at pictures in the encyclopedia.

*****

"You wanna come over for dinner tonight?"

I'm still not used to Dustin just pulling up on me so I jump when he suddenly appears next to me.

We haven't done anything together in about two weeks since I've been dealing with so much.

I shrug in response to his question, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. Dustin gives me a look, but chooses to ignore my behavior.

"Meet me in the parking lot after classes."

He doesn't give me time to respond since he's already walking down the hall. 

I sigh, closing my locker door with unnecessary force making it slam. It didn't do much, but it helped me feel slightly better.

****

I see Dustin leaning against his car with his arms folded. He looks out of place with his painted nails, messy hair and dark attire. I stalk up to him, keeping my head down.

I feel guilty for how I've treated him these past few days. I've been so caught up in my head that I've been avoiding him and pushing my cold shoulder. He doesn't seem put off by it, but I still know he deserves better than that.

"You came." He sounds surprised.

I simply nod and he opens the passenger door for me.

"Music," he says as he passes me his phone. I pick a song from the playlist he made for me, and his smug smile doesn't go unnoticed when the song begins playing. 

A few songs later, we pull into his driveway. The door opens and Dorito rushes out. We had stopped at the daycare to pick up Faith and the chubby baby squeals when she sees Dorito.

"Hi, Blade," Mrs. Swaz greets happily. She ushers us inside before calling for Dorito who trots back into the house. "Miriam!" Mrs. Swaz calls. "We have guests." She turns to us. "Make yourself at home. I'll be in the kitchen." She gives me a smile before walking off.

"It's you." Miriam says in surpsie. "Long time no see." 

I smile wryly, feeling shy. I guess my avoidance skills need more subtlety. We sit in the living room together and it feels awkward.

Faith giggles when she sees Dorito, and I put her on the floor to play with him. He lays down and let's the baby crawl on him, seeming unbothered by her hands roaming his body. I keep an eye on her to make sure she doesn't stuff her fist in her mouth.

"Why were you avoiding Dustin?" Miriam asks suddenly.

"Shut up, Mir." Dustin hisses.

She rolls her eyes at him. "No. I want to hear what she has to say." She pauses thoughtfully. "Well, read what she has to say."

I chuckle. I can't help myself. Miriam can be unintentionally funny. I rest my head in my hands that are propped on my knees. It's quiet for a while before I type out an answer on my phone.

I've been dealing with stuff. Vague and not very informative but it's the truth.

"What kinda stuff?" Miriam presses.

I shrug. Everything. At least that's what it feels like.

"Vague. But then again, you've only known us for like two months so we can't expect your whole life story yet."

My life story isn't much of a secret so if they wanted to know they could just ask any passerby. It's a lot of people's favorite pity story to tell.

"Dinner is ready!" Mrs. Swaz calls from the kitchen. 

My stomach grumbles in response and I hope it isn't loud enough for anyone else to hear.

Faith looks disappointed when I pick her up- she can't stand to be away from Dorito for too long. After washing her hands, I sit down with her and she immediately makes a grab for my plate.

"She's a curious little girl," Mrs. Swaz points out adoringly. "Do you need me to hold her?"

I give her a polite smile before shaking my head. 

"Let me rephrase. Can I please hold her?"

"Mom," Miriam laughs. "You're worse than I am!"

Everyone laughs and I can't help but smile. I hand Faith to her who tries to grab Mrs. Swaz hair.

"She loves hair," Miriam states and I nod laughing. 

Dinner progresses with lively conversations between the Swaz family. Despite not talking, they make an effort to include me by asking yes or no questions to which I nod or shake my head. When we're finished, they invite me to stay for a movie.

"Hey," Dustin whispers to me in the middle of the movie. I'll be honest, I'm not very entertained. Not that the movie is boring -well it kind of is- but I also don't find movies interesting. I turn to Dustin and he leans closer to my ear. "You look bored."

I smile sheepishly.

Grinning, he asks me in a hushed tone. "Do you have plans for spring break?" When I shake my head, he continues. "Would you be down to join us at our lake house?"

I look at him confused.

"I'll let you know the details. Just think about it, okay?"

I nod, focusing my eyes back on the screen but not really seeing anything, too occupied by what Dustin just asked me. 

****