Chapter 15: Late Night Balcony

She took us to a 24 hours restaurant and helped us order and we all ate and then we sat there and her and Harper and Mason were talking and laughing, and I've just been silent, guilt seeping through my pores.

When we went back to the hotel, I stayed quiet.

I couldn't sleep so I slipped out to the balcony and I'm watching cars pass in the street below.

I want to apologize to her so badly it's making my heart hurt.

It's three in the morning, but I find myself going back in the hotel room and lightly touching her shoulder.

She has beautiful skin.

I gently shake her, watching and her nose crinkles in her sleep. I smile softly as she stirs in her sleep before slowly opening her eyes, rubbing them.

"Hmm?" She mumbles, rubbing her eyes. She sits up, squinting at me in the darkness. "Nathan?" She asks softly. "What? Is somebody at the door?"

"No." I whisper. "I just..." I bite my lip. "Never mind. Go back to sleep."

I'm fix the blanket over her body, pulling it up higher for her as she settles back into the pillow.

I just disturbed her sleep for my own selfish reasons.

I go back to the balcony and shut the door, sitting out in the cold with a slow, mentally exhausted sigh.

After almost a full minute, I hear the back door open and close, and Odelette stands there in a tan knit sweater wrapped around her small frame. She leans against the railing in front of me, her eyes studying my face.

"Have you slept?" She asks.

I snort, shaking my head.

"I can't." I mumble.

"Why?" She asks softly.

I stand up, looking at her for a long time.

She's so fucking beautiful.

"I just..." I swallow, looking down. "I took you. A piece of you, little by little, chipping away without a care, calling you a brat, saying you're not a lady, telling you that you probably never talk to your Mom, taking your virginity when you hated me...I took you." I whisper. "And I just thought you were a bitch, that you were bitter because you just...were, but..." I shake my head. "I'm sorry." I whisper, building the nerve to look at her.

Her eyes search mine for a long time, and then she nods slowly to herself.

"You have not taken anything from me." She whispers. "I gave you my virginity." She says. "I gave it to you, willingly. You did not take anything from me. Yes, you said some rude things, but you apologized."

"But I'm sorry." I whisper. "I am seriously, truly, sorry. I'm so so sorry for it. I'm sorry."

"I forgive you." She whispers. "But you did not take from me. I gave away." She nods. "You are good man, Nathan, under all that bitter, there is good man in there. Whoever took it away is at fault."

I look down, over the edge of the railing.

"Who took it away?" She whispers. "You know my story now. You know everything. Professor Gaillard told you, correct?"

I nod, looking at her.

"So who took yours?"

I look down at the ground.

"You're going to think I'm stupid." I grumble.

"I might." She smiles. "But I will not judge."

I shove my hands in the pockets of my sweatpants.

"When I was in second grade, I kissed a girl." I say. "And she was the last person before you. I'd get crushes and they wouldn't like me back or I would be too nervous to talk to them...and I was a gentlemen, I mean...I opened doors for everyone the moment I was tall enough to open them...I opened car doors for my Mom and older sister, I took them out for dinner when I got a job, I was just your classic, sweater wearing gentlemen...until I turned nineteen and I had multiple girls my whole life rejecting me...and there was this one girl I'd like for years." I swallow. "And she asked me for Mason's number when I got the nerve to talk to her, even though she knew I liked her. Since then, I've just been a dick, convinced I was going to die alone. I forgot how to treat people...and then you came alone and we had sex and you just pissed me off, and my Mom got mad and showed up, and now I'm here, standing in front of you, who got ripped away from your parents at twelve years old..." I shake my head. "And I realized how horribly I've been treating you, and everyone and..." I look down. "I missed the bus because I was crying in the bathroom."

She pulls her sweater around her tighter.

"I never cry." I whisper. "But I don't know what happened to me. Is that stupid?"

She studies me, and then shakes her head.

"No. That is not stupid."

"Even crying in the bathroom?" I say bitterly.

"Tears are strength. They are the sweat of your troubles. After the tears come out, the good stuff comes. When somebody breaks your heart and you cry about it, the last time you cry, things get better. Things always get better. It's okay to cry, Nathan."

"Even when I'm crying over me being a dick?"

"You are not crying over you being a dick." She whispers. "You are crying over the realization that you are not the person your parents raised you to be."

She's right. She's completely right.

"I got into an argument with my parents." She admits, biting her lip. "After dinner, when we got to the hotel, because they found out about you, how I treat you...and they were scolding me and then I mentioned my motorcycle and my Maman nearly killed me." She laughs. "I knew when I bought it that she would kill me, but I thought she was dead and I was bitter, so I did not care. By age fifteen, I accepted that I would never see them again. To see that news piece..." she sighs. "I was crying out of hope. Fear, too, but mostly hope. I thought they were dead."

I swallow nervously, nodding.

"But they were not, and my parents are coming to Colorado, and my Maman is not going to let me ride my bike in the winter."

"Anyways, after the argument, I started crying in front of my parents, because I was no longer the person they raised me to be. I used to wear dresses and I was kind and loving."

I study her, sighing.

"Now I'm a bad person."

"Whoa." I say. "You are not a bad person. A bad person wouldn't have just busted into the courtroom with the risk of getting executed herself."

"You are not a bad person either." She whispers. "We are just two people with pasts that have made us bitter, and parents who will kill us before they let us continue on the path we are on."

I chuckle at the memory of my Mom sending me to jail for four days.

I was livid with her, but now I realize her intent.

I study her, sighing.

The way the city lights dance across her face makes me feel warm in the gently falling snow. She smiles softly at me, her eyes dancing with happiness and understanding, her perfectly straight white teeth showing. Her cute little nose, her cheeks, everything makes her beautiful. I move closer to her so I'm straight in front of her. She looks up at me, and my heart is pounding being this close to her.

"Your parents should be proud." I whisper.

"They are." She says. "But they are disappointed with my actions."

"Your parents and my parents should get together and go bowling." I say. She laughs softly, and I feel my heart flutter and my butterflies dancing around in my stomach. She's so beautiful, so extraordinary. There was so much more to this girl than I could have ever imagined.

She has been through so much. The passion and dedication radiating through this girl takes my breath away.

I find myself right out, my right hand brushing her hair through my fingers.

It's cold from the outside air, but soft, so, so soft. My heart is thumping loudly in my chest, and I can't help but wonder if she can hear it.

"Do you think you will ever move to France again?" I ask softly.

Slowly, she shakes her head.

"No." She whispers. "No, they have wronged my family in more ways than one. I love France, I do, but I cannot live here after what they've done."

I swallow loudly, my eyes trained on her lips as she speaks.

"Okay." I mumble. "I'll pick you up."

"What?" She asks softly.

"For class." I say. "Or work, if I'm not working myself. I will pick you up and bring you. That way you don't have to go on the bike and your Mom doesn't have to get angry."

She bites her lip nod I watch as she pulls the plump flesh between her teeth. I gulp.

"I can give you gas money." She whispers, releasing her lip.

"I don't want it." I murmur.

"Okay." She mumbles.

A deep silence falls over us.

We're just two people who have become bitter from our troubles.

My eyes glance at her soft, plump lips, and I long to taste her, to feel her.

Her eyes move to my lips too, and then back to mine.

I find myself leaning down slowly, my eyes looking into her eyes, glancing at her lips, and back to her eyes.

She reaches up, tangling her hands in my hair.

I brush my lips against hers, my eyes closing on the impact. The moment our lips graze, I feel my whole body becoming warm, my left hand moving to cradle her cheek, my right hand supporting her head. I close the distance again, pressing my lips against her gentle ones. She locks her arms around my neck, kissing me back slowly, passionately, our tongues mixing. Her cheek is so soft in my hand, and I find myself gently pushing her up against the railing to the balcony, the kiss deepening. I drop my right hand to her waist, and her tank top has ridden up and I can feel her soft skin.

She's so extravagant. I kiss her with every apology, every emotion, every feeling I have in my body.

_____

We made out on and off for three hours, only stopping when the sun started to make an appearance over the horizon, only pulling apart when we remembered we had to meet Gaillard in the front of the hotel at six.

Now the four of us are in the lobby and her parents are in here too.

I keep finding myself glancing at her, thinking about kissing her, or just holding her. She's sitting with her head on her Mom's shoulder, and I feel guilty because I kept her from sleeping.

"You look like shit." Mason says. "What time did you fall asleep?"

"I didn't." I say.

"What?" He asks.

"I didn't go to sleep."

He looks at Odeletta and back at me, his eyes narrowing.

"She looks tired." Harper says suspiciously. "Did you two have sex?"

"We-"

"Bonjour." Professor Gaillard says with a smile, walking off the elevator. "We have a group of translators today so you guys can explore the city by yourselves! You're all grown! If you get lost, call my phone number, okay? It's on the card I gave you guys when you got your room keys. Stay together!"

Odeletta's Dad says something to his daughter and wife, and they both nod. Odeletta says something and they both nod, and then they stand up, following her as she walks over to us.

"Um..." she looks at me and I see her cheeks tinging pink. I shove my hands in my pockets. "We are going to go to Troyes..." she trails off. "You guys can come, if you want. I think I will be a better translator."

"Sure." Harper says.

Mason nudges me, raising his eyebrows.

"Well?" He asks.

"Uh..." I start rubbing my neck. "Sure."

Her parents make a phone call with her phone and everyone kind of goes off to do their own thing.

When we went to get food late last night, we went and got some of our American money exchanged to French money, so now we all have money.

So after a little while, we all get in a car and her parents direct the driver to a rental place, and then we get a van and her Dad drives.

It only seats seven, and there's six of us. The middle row has a gap between it and there's three seats in the back.

Mason and Harper sat in the back, I sit behind her Dad, and she sits behind her Mom.

We stopped at some fast food place and got food and ate and now we're in the car on the way to Troyes.

"So, are all three of you from America?" Her Dad asks.

He has a slight French accent, but it's not that defined.

"Yes." Mason says.

"Where from?" He asks.

"Nate and I are from Ohio." He says.

"I'm from Nebraska." Harper says.

"Wow, where in Nebraska?" He asks.

"Lincoln." She says.

"Where in Ohio?" He asks us.

"I was born in Cincinnati and moved to Columbus when I was six." Mason says.

"I was born in Columbus and lived there until I went to Colorado for college." I say.

He nods thoughtfully.

"I was born and raised in a small town near Columbus called Millersport." He says. "I was planning to move to Columbus with Odeletta and Adelaide and Rosalie when Odette was twelve, but..." he trails off. "Well, you know." He says.

"I know where Millersport is." I say. "My cousins live there. I used to spend weeks there in the summer when I was a kid. My aunt has a house on Buckeye Lake and my Uncle tied a rope to a branch and I used to swing into the lake with my cousins." I say. "One time I jumped off at the wrong time and launched myself into the yard instead. I broke my arm."

"I remember that." Mason says. "You were miserable."

"I loved that little town." Her Dad smiles. "I had a creek running through my yard at my parents house when I was a kid. Around seventeen, my best friend dared me to jump over it when my parents were at work and I was drunk. I jumped over it and fell into the ditch. I had to get six stitches because a branch cut me. My Mom nearly killed me."

I laugh quietly.

"I miss Ohio." I admit. "The winters were worse than Colorado, but it was fun."

"Do you have any siblings?" He asks me.

"Yes, a little brother and an older sister. My brother is seventeen, I'm twenty three, and my sister is twenty eight."

He nods thoughtfully.

"Did you fight with them?" He asks.

"Not usually. I only got mad at my little brother when I was a teenager and he was five years younger and I had to babysit him."

"Yeah, I had a younger brother." He says. "I know the feeling." He lets out a heavy sigh. "He's um...gone now, but his wife is still somewhere. I love her like my baby sister. I'm hoping we find her."

"Papa, Uncle would not want you to be upset over him." Odeletta says.

"I know." He says.

"Maybe that's where we will move." Her Mom speaks up in a thick French accent similar to that of her daughter. "Lette, will you stay in Colorado?"

"Yes Maman, until I've graduated."

"Will you boys move back to Ohio?" Her Dad asks.

"Most likely." I say. "My sister lives there, my brother, my parents. My aunt and uncle are still in Millersport. I belong there."

He nods to himself.

"I'm sure you and Mason will remain friends with my daughter after college then. Odette, will you come to Ohio?"

"Yes Papa, after I've graduated." She says.

"Excellent! You will start a family near your friends! Who knows, maybe one of these fine young men are my future son-in-laws!"

"Papa!" Odeletta hisses.

He simply laughs and turns up the radio, glancing at his wife who is smiling.

"Well, if it's anyone, I think it's Nathan." Harper says, earning a glare from Odeletta.

"I do too." Mason says. I can practically hear his smirk.

"Nathan, Nate, if you will, are you physically involved with my daughter?"

Odeletta immediately starts talking to her Dad in French.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop." He grumbles.

The car is quiet for a few minutes.

"Odette, sweetie, snapping at your Dad like that just proves he's right." Her Mom pipes up with a smile.

She starts to say something in French, but my phone starts ringing loudly, interrupting the conversation.

"Sorry." I cringe when I see the name. "I have to answer this."

"By all means, Nathan." Her Mom smiles.

I press answer.

"Hey Mom."

"Nathan, you have been in another country and you haven't called me. What happened with Odeletta? Are you alright?"

"I'm okay." I say.

"Can you answer the question or are you with her?"

"The second one." I say.

"Okay." She says. "Are you having fun? Take a lot of photos, okay? Your grandmother wants them for the family calendar."

"Okay." I say.

"Be safe, okay?"

"Okay." I say.

"I love you honey."

"I love you too." I say quietly.

"Bye."

"Bye."

We get off the phone.

"Who was that?" Her Dad asks.

"Papa." Odeletta sighs.

"What bug? It's just a question."