I might be a man of my word, but I'm a man of my word who feels queasy. I agreed to testify against my dad, but I never thought things would move so quickly once I agreed. Apparently, my agreeing to testify is all the defense needed to make my father's arrest.

That was two weeks ago, and the two weeks following my dad's arrest have been a whirlwind. Bryant and I have been working with the prosecution to prepare for today. Today is the day I testify.

In fact, I'm seated in a courtroom at the moment listening to Bryant recount the events that led up to his selling drugs for my dad. Listening to him talk about my dad threatening him makes me sick.

"So, Holland threatened your father's life if you didn't do what he told you to do?"

"Yes," Bryant acknowledges.

"That was enough to make you sell drugs to your classmates?"

"Yes."

We were instructed to keep our answers simple, but Bryant is taking it to another level. He's seething, and the rest of the room may not be aware of it, but I can see it. So far, they've failed to move his dad. They said it doesn't happen until today is over. As long as we both follow through, Bryant's dad is supposed to be moved tomorrow.

That means Bryant has been a wreck for almost a month now and there's not been much any of us have been able to do to ease his mind.

"No further questions, your honor."

Upon hearing the words of the prosecutor, my father's attorney stands up. He's the best lawyer money can buy. We've been told he's ruthless in court, and I find myself tense further when he stand up and sets his sights on Bryant.

"Bryant, am I to understand you have a criminal record?" the lawyer asks.

"Relevance, your honor. Bryant isn't on trial here," the prosecutor says.

"The prosecution opened his credibility up for scrutiny when they put him on the stand."

"I'll allow it," the judge says.

This is going to be brutal. I slink down in my chair a bit, wishing I could leave the room for this bit.

"I do," Bryant acknowledges.

"What crimes were you convicted of?" the lawyer asks.

"Criminal Assault with a deadly weapon and grand theft," Bryant says.

"So you weren't exactly the model citizen the prosecution would like to paint you as," the lawyers stated.

"Objection!"

"Withdrawn," he says, "you seem cavalier about a charge as serious as assault with a deadly weapon."

Bryant doesn't answer the non question, but he appears bored even to me. I haven't allowed myself to consider what the results of this trial will mean until now. If my dad gets off the hook, not only will he be free to come after Bryant and I, he will stop at nothing to get revenge on Bryant's dad. This will all be for nothing.

"Is there a question?" the prosecutor asks.

"The details of that case were graphic. I'm asking if you could do it again, would you change the events that happened that day?"

"No," Bryant says simply.

"We're supposed to believe you took a tire iron to a man's skull, and you have no regrets, but you had to be coerced into selling pot to your classmates?"

Bryant's eyes snap to mine as soon as the words leave the defense attorney's mouth. He seems bothered by my knowing this information, but he doesn't know I've already seen his entire criminal record. With everything that's been going on, I didn't feel like it was an important conversation to have.

Bryant blows air out through his mouth, clearly frustrated by the question.

"Believe what you want," he snaps at the defense attorney before turn his attention back to me and explaining something he doesn't have to explain to me, "but the man we're talking about here shouldn't still be breathing. Not only did he put a twelve year old in the hospital, he also put that kid's dad behind bars because of his reaction to finding his son in the hospital. Fault me for it if you want, but I was in the hospital for two weeks, and when I got out, I was sent back to live with the guy who put me there."

I didn't doubt there was an explanation for what he did, and I wish we'd had this conversation somewhere I could tell him that. I nod my head at him, doing my best to convey my understanding.

The torture of watching Bryant's character being attacked shifts my thoughts on my own testifying. Before Bryant took the stand, I was dreading it. I still am, but my testifying means Bryant gets to stop.

I'm angry. I'm so angry at the moment I can't see straight. There's nowhere to focus my anger either because it's not just one person I'm pissed at. It's the world.

I'm pissed at the prosecutor for waiting so long to move my dad. I'm pissed at Holland for putting me in the position to have to worry so much for my dad's safety. I'm pissed at the prosecutor for making me relive the events that occurred with Paul, and as always, the ever present anger towards Paul himself is present too.

To be completely honest, I'm pissed at all of the people in the court room listening to this like it's their evening television program. The only person in the room I'm not pissed at is currently on the stand fielding questions from his dad'a attorney because I asked him to.

"Is it true when your mom left, you told your father he belonged behind bars?" the lawyer asks.

The lawyer is where he is in life for a reason. He certainly has a talent for singling out a persons weak spots. Kyle told me about what happened when his mom left. He's never talked much about his mom though. It's a sore spot, and the asshole attorney clearly knows that.

"Do you believe men who beat their wife and son belong behind bars because to answer your question, yes. He belongs behind bars," Kyle says, sounding sure of himself.

"So you've wanted him behind bars for several years now. Is it possible your testimony today is being influenced by that belief?"

Kyle shakes his head, looking as frustrated by the day as I am.

"I'm testifying to what I've seen and heard. It's up to the jury to decide if he's guilty or not," Kyle answers seamlessly.

He's handling this better than I could have thought. Honestly though, I don't know why I thought this would go any other way. Kyle has continued to prove himself to me every day since our camping trip. If I'm being completely honest with myself, he would have probably proven himself to me sooner had I allowed him the chance to do so.

No matter how well Kyle is handling it, it has me on edge the entire time he is fielding questions. This whole day has me on edge, but having him in the defense's crosshairs is a special kind of hell. My self loathing teaches an all time high when he's forced into reliving the events that led up to his mom's leaving, and I know I'm the person forcing him to do it. He wouldn't be up there if it weren't for my asking him to. I find myself breathing a sigh of relief when Kyle is dismissed from the stand.

The last person of the day to take the stand is Holland himself. His testimony is exactly what I expect. It paints Kyle as an ungrateful rich teenager who has had everything handed to him on a silver platter. His words about Kyle grate on every nerve in my body, and it's not lost on me that I would have said the same things about Kyle a month ago.

I did say the same things about Kyle a month ago, but Kyle let every harsh word and ignorant assumption I made about him roll off of his shoulders in a way I never would have been able to. Today, the guy testified against his own dad in order to help a guy he's never met and the person who has been awful to him since the day we met.

I have no words for the gratitude I feel towards him today. Holland's testimony closes with another attack on my character, and even though I'd like to say I'm man enough to allow his words to roll off my shoulders, I can't. I can't help but allow them to feed my anger.

Once Holland is done testifying, the trial draws to a close, and the jury retires to deliberate. I don't have the faintest idea of how this all will turn out. I head out into the hallway of the courthouse hoping to catch Kyle. He's standing in the hallway with his hands shoved into his suit pockets when I find him.

"How do you think it went?" he asks me, sounding as apprehensive as I feel.

I have no idea how it went, but all we can do is wait at this point. Wait to see if I forced him through that for nothing. Wait to see if my dad gets moved somewhere safe, and wait to see if fate will come down in my favor for the first time in my life.