《Saeran x reader~ Clubs Equals Love》Clouded thoughts

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love?

LOVE?!

I couldn't help but throw my head back and laugh loudly at myself.

"Who am I kidding? I would never love anyone, let alone a bitch I met at a club"

...

I closed my eyes as I thought back to the first day I ever decided to visit the club...

Saeyoung obviously didn't want me to go but never protested, but the RFA was pretty chill about it...

I couldn't help but smile as I thought back to their reactions.

"People there are crazy!" -Yoosung

"Most people at clubs are drunk, but it's fun" -Zen

"The wine is good" -Jumin

"Be careful. Clubs can be dangerous" -Jaehee

"Don't get involved in the girls, they're usually nasty" -MC

Yes... the girls are very nasty.

I felt sick just thinking about them. They would only hang out with the good-looking or rich guys.

I shook my head as I stood up.

But _____ is nothing like them...

she never once showed interest in me... I feel different when I'm around her...

With many thoughts to think about, I made my way back home.

...

"I thought we had something. Guess I was wrong."

...

Her words kept replaying through my head over and over and I couldn't fall asleep that night.

What did you mean?

{Next day}

The first thing I thought of the next morning was her.

I rubbed my eyes as I reached out to check my phone. "Saeyoung, you idiot" I muttered as I looked at my screen.

Over 10 missed calls from him.

Tiredly, I placed my phone back and got up.

I yawned as I made my way outside. "Rain?"

I shrugged my shoulders as I began running laps around the neighbourhood in the rain. While running, I abruptly stopped causing me to almost slip on the wet floor. I took hold of a pole to keep my balance as I squinted my eyes.

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"Oh."

I sighed in disappointment as I continued to run.

Just someone who looks like _____.

I had no idea why I felt the urge to see her so bad. My heart began aching in my chest as I remembered her pained expression.

Perhaps it wasn't such a great idea.

I regretted everything I said to her that night as I stopped at the park to take a breath.

I looked up, and clicked my tongue as I realized the rain had gotten much worst.

"Great. Just my fucking luck"

{Days after}

Just a few more days until Saeyoung and MC return. I have never in my life felt so excited to see my stupid brother.

I looked out the windows as I watched the rain pouring down.

I wonder how _____'s going.

I haven't seen her for days. I never dared enter the club after that. I didn't care whether she was there or not, I didn't have the courage to see her.

I wasn't going to lie, it pains me when I think about how we would meet at the same old club each night together.

"It's all my fault"

"Everything is always my fault"

I could feel tears streaming down my cheeks as I used a hand to wipe it away.

When I noticed I've been crying, I couldn't help but smile.

Crying over a girl. I'm such a crybaby.

Stupid me, she deserves better anyway.

...

I checked my watch and realized it was 10.00pm.

10:00pm...

This was the time _____ and I would usually meet up.

I wonder if she's sitting there waiting for me?

What if she gets bullied?

Thoughts began to cloud my mind as curiosity got the better of me. I immediately took a nearby jacket as I exited the house.

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I ran as fast as I can, but once I reached the place, I found my legs were unable to move.

What if she is there?

What would I say?

How would she react?

How would I react?

What if she's not there?

I hesitated for a moment before gathering up my courage and walked in.

Yep...

She wasn't there.

I looked around multiple of times before accepting it and walked back outside.

"Why was I even expecting her to be there?"

Feeling ashamed, I walked home in the rain with my hands in my pocket.

I felt my phone vibrating again, but didn't bother taking it out.

Probs Saeyoung

While walking home, I looked up the sky. It wasn't the best weather but I suddenly found myself sitting down at a bench looking up.

"I'm so sorry _____. Please forgive me"

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