Chapter 36

Weeks had passed since my heated argument with Ryder. I hated to admit it, but I missed him.

I missed him bad.

It was like a whole half of me was completely gone. A whole side that I cared for, just disappeared.

Every once in a while, I would see him in the hallways of school. What was weird though, was that he looked as devastated and sad as I looked.

I couldn't understand why. We weren't ever technically dating, and we both knew that he was a player, so why was he sad that he lost me?

I mean, I wasn't ugly. I'm not one to drown myself in insecurities, but he had all the girls in this school at his fingertips, and I knew that most of them were amazingly gorgeous. Joanne, for example, had long, dirty blonde hair that was curled perfectly every day. Her face was a nice olive complexion. She was fairly nice, even though I had never spoken to her before, she would smile at me in class and the hallways often.

Why couldn't Ryder like a girl like that?

"Oops, sorry!" I said when I ran into a student in the hallway. Thankfully, nothing had fell to the ground.

"It's okay." When I heard his voice, I froze; scared to look up and meet his dark brown eyes.

When I finally did, there was a hint of a tiny genuine smile on his face. I saw his lips and wanted to kiss him so bad, but backed away.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry." Then I made my way past him.

That had been the only physical contact I've had with him for a whole month. It was the first time that I spoke to him since the argument, too!

I don't know why, but a flutter began to form in my chest and my face flushed with heat.

Get over yourself, Buchanan.

When the bell rang, I made my way to fifth period, which I also had with Ryder. It had been difficult to ignore him the past weeks, but I had done it. But now? I couldn't stop peeking behind me to see him and then meet his gaze. It was like all the hard work I put into avoiding him just crashed down completely in a blink.

I quickly turned my head back around and tried my hardest to listen to the teacher talk about the science of cooking a Thanksgiving turkey.

This was going to be a long day.

"Oops, sorry!" I heard her say when I deliberately ran into her in the hallway. I had to see her, I just had to hear her voice again.

"It's okay." I said. I knew she recognized my voice because I saw her body tense and freeze. I smiled at her when she looked up and saw her gorgeous face. It had been so long. About a month, if I recall.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry." She mumbled and pushed back past me. I wanted to desperately to chase after her, grab her arm, and kiss her deeply. But I knew that would only scare her away again.

During fifth period, which was a science class I had with Ruby, I kept glancing over at her. I saw her head tilt to look back at me, and when I caught her gaze, she quickly turned back around. I smiled inwardly.

After school ended, finally, I headed over to the gym. We were barely hovering over getting kicked out, but Felix, a couple other guys from the gym, and I all headed over the other day to make sure that they didn't mess with the gym, or else they would be seeing us again.

That seemed to do the trick. With Feliciano's huge frame and height and the others' built bodies, I was sure they wouldn't mess with us.

An hour into practicing on the punching bag, Feliciano came over with some Chinese takeout in his hands.

"Hey bud, I brought dinner." He held out a box for me after I wiped off the sweat from my body.

"Thanks." I grabbed the box and immediately shoveled the food into my mouth.

"Slow down conveyor belt, or else you'll get cramps." He patted his belly.

I chuckled and took his advice. "So, how was Italy?" I asked.

Felix had gone back to Rome to meet up with his parents.

"Good. Too many tourists, though." He said and I laughed.

"Maybe I'll visit one day." I said.

"Yeah," he swallowed his food, "and maybe you can bring Ruby with you, si?"

I paused before letting the food enter my mouth, letting it hang in the air. Setting the chopsticks back down in the carton, I began to play with the noodles.

"I don't talk to her anymore." I said, hurt coursing through me.

"Why not?" Felix asked with a frown.

I shook my head. "It was all my fault. I screwed up big time."

"Was it Monica?" Felix asked.

I looked up at him, puzzled. "How'd you know?"

"Ruby's been coming in here a little bit more now, well, whenever you're not here. She told me everything. I don't think she wanted too, but she just kept punching the bag harder whenever your name would pop up." He chuckled.

"But anyways, she also said that she missed you, Ryder. She may be mad, but it's obvious that you two were made to be more than friends, eh?"

I smiled softly. She missed me. Ruby actually missed me like I missed her.

"Yeah, but it's too late. I can't do anything about it. Like I said, I screwed up Felix."

He shook his head. "No, no. You don't understand. Ruby makes you laugh, yes?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah."

He kept going. "And she makes you smile, si?"

"Of course."

He leaned closer. "And she makes you happy and all lovey dovey, yes?"

"I wouldn't say lovey dov-"

"Of course she does!" he exclaimed and smiled. "So you need to apologize. And not only that, but you need to make her trust you. To prove to her that you won't ever hurt her."

I processed what he just said. "I think I can do that."

"I know you can do that." He said, and patted my back.

"But it's easier said than done. What should I do?" I asked.

Feliciano leaned in close and grinned.

"Go fight for her."

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