I'm so tired going through this hell, when will I ever leave this place. I never did anything wrong in my life so why is God punishing me, Even though if I try to escape this place I'll only be back in here again. what should I do so that I'll never come back to this place ever again?..Its just because of that night, If only..IF ONLY I COULD GO BACK THROUGH TIME AND STOP MYSELF!! it would have not ended like this...

"Hey Y/n, I'm back" I just looked at him and look back at the TV again "hi" I said while surfing through the channels finding a good movie to watch he went towards me and sat next to me "I miss you Y/n~" he said while putting his head on my shoulder I replied at him with a simple 'hmm' then continued switching the channels,then stop when I found the movie I like.

Through the whole movie the only thing that was on my mind is how I will kill him by stabbing his neck and nothing more, just killing him would mean freedom for me..But I did not do so since I'm too weak to do that.

Through the months, the longer I stay here the worser my depression grew. The only thing I did was wake up, eat, shower, eat, and sleep it was a daily life cycle and Im getting tired of it, every single day its all the same...

But then an Idea pop to my head 'what if I just kill myself' It will end all the suffering I endured in this life and i'll be finally at peace! Peace... I'll achieve it oneday...

I must kill myself by slitting my throat thats the only way by making sure Im completely dead. The first time I tried to kill myself was cutting my wrist but he saw me and immediately brought me to the hospital, and it failed. This time I'll make sure, I'll make sure to slit it even deeper. But first I must find a knife.....

Finding a knife wasnt really that hard since I could just get some in the kitchen...

I immediately went to the bedroom and made sure to lock the door. I place the knife pointing at my neck and slit through my throat it was a really deep cut and alot of blood splurted out, but I covered it first I grab my phone and called Shen ZhiJie and he answered it "What is it Y/n?" I heard his voice in another line this made me smile "I only wanted to say that.." I took a deep breathe first and then speak "I Fucking hate you so much you Fucking asshole, and also guess what im doing right now" with that I ended the call and let go of the pressure on my neck and let all the blood drain out of me, Even though it was slow I didn't felt in pain, infact it felt like Heaven knowing that ill be at peace in any moment by now my view started to blur out I knew that it is finally time where I die, The last thing I saw before dying was the look of Shen ZhiJie's Horrified face made it even more perfect.....