His feet slithered outwards on the slippery ground as he rounded the corner into another narrow path. The shock of the slip caused him to grasp unto the rough wall which incited tiny cuts into his palm. He winced to the pain. With the same speed he had tripped, he got back to his shaking feet. Tired legs kissed the wet ground as he raced. His heart beats hastily, each beat resonated in his ears. Every part of him felt numb not when his chubby body could hardly lift him. From time to time, he glanced over his shoulder as though he was running away from someone. He had to run, had to be away from them before they got him. His past deeds had caught up with him and this time, their repercussion was death.

He dragged his feet, feeling like the air in his lungs will leave him soon. Tired, he took the rough concrete wall of a house as a support to hold his sagging exhausted body. It was late into the night and the moon was the only source of light for the quiet earth. The silence was eerie. It was the kind that gave away the feeling of death and danger. His next step sank his leg into a puddle of stagnant water. He took the left turn glad he was about to get to the road where a car awaits him.

He had made a plan when he knew he had been caught. He had to leave the country. No place in the country was save for him because Jagaban, that devil, rules everywhere. A choking smell from a garbage at the backyard of one of the rickety houses filled his lungs. He gagged, slamming his thick hand over his nose as he stumbled out of the narrow path into gravelled road.

He saw the car on the other side of the street and with a sigh of relieve he crossed. It was too late when he saw the car speeding toward him. The hit was hard, sending his body high in the air, over the car, unto the floor. He jerked, blood spilling from his mouth while every part of him began to go numb from pain. Even though his hearing was like a bursted speaker, he heard the crunching of tyres against the gravelled road that receded into nothing and through his fading vision, he saw the bright headlight of a car. Doors opened then closed. Coming closer to him were confident footsteps from different directions. He raised his head up with difficulty, his body trembling. Through his heavy lids, he saw him. The tall confident frame and unhurried steps. His heart jumped to his throat despite the irregular beat. Jagaban! His head and every sense of his sang out the dreadful name, a name many feared. The kind of name that gives anyone freezing chills.

"Playing hide and seek, aren't we?" Jagaban spoke, his voice soft.

The man tried to speak but no word came out of his bleeding mouth. Jagaban's eyes glinted with pleasure. He was clean and spotless in his casual appearance with an aloof and thoughtful air around him making him seem more dangerous.

"For how long? Hm?" Jagaban tilted his head a bit with a mocking smirk. "It's over now, Dennis. Tell my popsy say I dey greet am." The sharp metal that appeared from the pocket of Jagaban's shorts glistened in the shaft of moonlight. Dennis' eyes widened. He tried to rise and speak but jerked like a car that ran out of fuel. The knife dived effortlessly through soft flesh, leaving a clean cut that ran deeper than the eyes could see. Thick red liquid gushed from it, giving way for more to rush from Dennis' bloodied lips. He stood, waited and watched until Dennis took his last breath. It was then he turned on his expensive soles and headed to the waiting car.

Jagaban snatched the rag from his right hand man, Alabama, to wipe the blood that drenched his hands. He wore a frown of displeasure and hid an unspoken anger beneath it.

"I could have taken care of him, Baba." Alabama spoke as the car travelled down the road, gravels crunchy beneath the tyres.

"Like you did the last time I told you to take care of him." His voice was calm and low. "All you did was shoot him and he survived."

"I am sorry, Boss."

Alabama got no reply but the quick toss of blood stained rag at him. He caught it as it landed on his chest. Jagaban slid down to a comfortable position in his seat then tipped his fedora until it shielded his face. Alabama updated him about the recent happenings in the gang. He listened but somewhere along the way, he tuned Alabama's voice out.

There are choices we make in life that change everything. He chose this path a decade ago in exchange for his freedom from prison. It was the best and it still was. It had not been easy but he had grown, learnt and created a name for himself in the underworld. A name many feared even in his absence. He had left permanent marks of different kind in various places and the tales can never be forgotten. Money he had dreamt about belonged to him in different currencies, housed in a duplex he owns in Ibadan and many other places only few knew about. They can't be kept in the bank. In this ruthless underworld, many knew him as Jagaban but there was a different world where he was a son, father, and husband and was called Joshua.

A conversation with his wife, maybe soon to be ex-wife, few days ago confirmed she knew everything. Lola knew who he was and what he actually does. His life history was a story she knew by heart. He had thought he was fooling her all along when he had been fooling himself. He should have been suspicious when she had never made a fuss each time he came home with those terrible injuries and those times he went for journeys she never asked or pestered him about. He had always felt her lack of affection for him had elicited such reaction. She might not even give a damn if he died. Maybe he was right or not. Her cheating on him with that low life, good for nothing ex of hers proved that he never meant anything meaningful or important to her. Why? Why had Lola done that? Why did she do that to him? He did not see it coming. He did not suspect it. The guy who was assigned to look for Anthony had not reported anything about it. It hurts. Damn! His heart's bleeding. He feels like he had landed on a ton of bricks with broken bones and bruised part to leave with. The injury she inflicted on his heart still hurt. It was bleeding and killing him slowly. Is this karma for those times he had also being an unfaithful person in his past relationships? For days he broke hearts and ruined lives? Most times, when he's not buried in his work, he is consumed by pain that stole the living existence from him. Somehow, he blames himself.

Prison life was nothing to write about. It toughened him up, stronger than his life before prison did. He loved to create a name for himself everywhere he went to but had decided to be cool for the ruthless life he lived outside had granted him a life imprisonment. Anger caused by the death of his love was etched in every core of his being. He mourned her loss in a way only he understood. Joshua blamed himself for her death because had he left that life when she told him to quit, she wouldn't have paid for his sins. He cried sometimes but most times, he had a tank full of tears in him and a heart as dead as a red rose. Murdering the guy who killed her had not dosed that fire, rage and sorrow in him. It only worsened them. When Joshua went to prison, he became cool headed, did everything on his own, minded his business and did not interact with anyone until that day they chose him as their next victim.

There was a little gang in prison ruled by a man in his sixties known as Papi. Papi got a life imprisonment for murdering a family twenty three years ago. So he had stayed for so long in prison and was feared by most prisoners including his boys. He ruled that world. Papi was very familiar with most wardens. Like always, Joshua had been on his own after clearing a large area of grass. He was exhausted and thirsty. The heat of that day had drained moisture from his body and he was tired of waiting for the warden to come and share their sachet of water to them. His saliva was the only moisture he could get down his dried throat.

It all started with a shove and had escalated to a fight. Something dangerous and deadly rose in him. A sleeping monster had woken up in him. He would have killed that inmate had the wardens and other prisoners not interfered. Once again, he began to live a life similar to the one he had before prison with the exception of no crimes to commit. From one, the members of his gang became two then many. Most times, they got into fights. Many saw a troublesome, hardened criminal they had to stay away from. But it was the perfect mask to wear to conceal the never ending sorrow and the dark abyss he had fallen into within him.

Then one day, chairman came to visit. He wanted to expand, to be diverse and needed a capable hand. Someone as ruthless as he was in business and ruling. A man he trusted and won't cheat him. And he chose The Don.

"I told them the best man for the job is in prison. They are ready to release you." Chairman was seated opposite him in the small room, his walking stick resting on the metal table, a cigar in hand. Scruffs of white hair covered his jaw. He looked different. Older. Cleaner. Finer. Groomed. Everything about him screamed wealth but there was a dangerous air around him.

"How?"

The corners of Chairman's lips moved up. "These people got connections. There are ways to make your release possible."

Two days later, he walked out of the wobbly gate of the prison to a BMW waiting outside for him, Chairman in it. A new name was given. A new life started. That marked a fresh beginning to an old life with a different path. Lola had a different way of saying that.

After Joshua had helped Lola to her feet, he guided her nervous wrecked body to the nearest settee which she sat in and cried. She sobbed so hard until the handkerchief he had given her was soaked with tears. He stood by her, running a hand down her back. Watching her cry felt like someone chiselled his heart bit by bit. The reasons for her tears were unknown to him. But in her cries, he heard relief and something he could not point out. He looked behind her to the body on the floor. Joshua recognised the man. Few months ago, he was a business associate until few hours ago when his pictures had been emailed to him. He could not believe that the man he had been searching for was right beneath his nose, so close. The man he wanted to rip apart little by little and cause so much pain that he would beg for death was his business associate. He was responsible for what happened to Lola five years ago. For every pain she still feels. Tony broke her beyond amendment and he was there to do the same to him. Instead, he found his wife in the middle of his living room, on her knees, weeping. But, what was she doing there?

When her cries reduced to nothing, Joshua asked, "Are you okay?" He made a signal to one of the two men who had followed him in as Lola gave a reply with a nod. "You will be fine." The man who had rushed out of the living room came back with a jug of water and tumbler. Joshua poured a glass and handed it to his wife.

She drank the entire cup, exhaled, and relaxed before she looked up at him with questioning eyes. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in Germany?"

"Well....I...." Lola started to open doors until she found a bathroom which she disappeared into. Every second she spent in there intensified the nerves that sat everywhere in his stomach. Damn it! She has found out. What excuse would he make? He had to come out clean, stop the lies. "Excuse us." Was his crusty order to his men who stepped out just as Lola came out of the toilet. "I did not leave the country." He confessed.

"I know." Her face had been washed and patted dry. She looked as though she had not been crying but those bronzed eyes gave her away. The Hermes bag which occupied a seat was snatched before she settled in the chair. That aura no one could ignore was back. She wore her pride again, her shoulders stuck high, chin out and eyes turned icy. Lola rampaged through her bag for makeup. There was a great contrast to the woman who was weeping some minutes ago. How the hell can she just switch moods like that? "You are dealing with some problems in your business. No!" Foundation dabbed on her smooth face, lip gloss shining on her lips, eyeliner following the curve of her eyes, she shook her head to oppose her words. "Business sounds legal. I will put it this way. Your mafia or cartel. Oil bunkering? What you have been doing for almost all your life."

For a moment he could not breathe. His heart stopped beating. She knew! Lola knew who he was and what he does? The ignorance had been a pretence all along. He felt hot all over in his black attire and there was a sudden bang in his head. "Orekelewa." The word came out breathless.

Lola smiled. "Surprised? Don't be, Jagaban." She threw a dismissive hand. His eyes flared at the name only those in the underworld knew. "That's what they call you in the underworld. The devil. Your name sends chills down people's spine. Your appearance make them tremble. Cold-blooded. Unforgiving. A man of his words." He sat down from shock. "I am tired of lying, of all the secrets we have kept from one another. Of the pretence. They are just a sign of the distrust we have for one another. We did not trust one another enough to tell each other our darkest secrets."

It had been a long while since he had been put in a tight spot. Lola took pleasure from it. Everything was just too much to comprehend. Sweat dripped down his back. Why had she been pretending? What else does she know about him? Water moisturized his dry throat yet he felt dehydrated within. He gathered his nerves, calmed himself before he raised his eyes to look at her. Calmer and in control. "Then we have a lot to talk about. I....I..."

"When are you going to tell me about your son?" She dropped her words like a bomb that was meant to blow and destroy everything. Her eyes were hard, held a lot of malice and the disbelieve she felt. How did she find out? Had her father told her? Or her grandparents? They were the only living souls who knew he has a son aside from his family. Innocent eyes. A boy who reminded him of his childhood, flashed in his head. "The boy I had no idea about. My father did not tell me anything about him." Oh, the man had not told her? Then, how did she find out? Does that matter at the moment when his secrets can actually ruin their relationship? "I want to believe that he also does not know about your son. Or maybe he knew but chose to keep it away from me." She shook her head, a sign of the disappointment she feels.

"I was going to tell you about him soon. When I arrive from this journey I never embarked on."

"His mother?"

"She's just a baby mama." He was quick to defend. "Nothing important to me. This boy was a mistake that happened nearly eight years ago. She would not abort the pregnancy. So, I had to take responsibility for it."

"Keep the bullshit about what happened and all." She gestured a hand to dismiss his words. "I am not interested. We need to talk, Joshua. We need to have a real conversation." His heart flipped, skittered and raced in his cage of ribs. Lola wore no emotion on her face. She was different from the woman who wept out few minutes ago before him. It seemed like the news of his son had not affected her. No compassion. No pain. Nothing to show how she felt. It baffled him even though he knew she was just so good at hiding her sentiments. "I have been asked by a lot of people why I married you. I had my answers but I could not give them. They were best kept within me. Between my father and I and my grandparents. But I will give you my answers. Oil bunkering is the reason I married you. You know about that better than anyone."

"Yes! No!" He shook his head. "I meant I thought you did it because of the pressure around you."

"Pressure?" She sneered. "Do I look like the kind who can be pressured into doing what she does not want to go? I have grown past that stage, Joshua. And when I say oil bunkering, I do not mean the guy with his five litter jerry can pilfering oil from the pipeline to sell at a very cheap rate. I meant the one that involves ships sitting at the ports of Niger Delta with tankers full of oil. The latter is your actual job, Joshua."

"How did you know? As in...how....how.....you should not have known. You shouldn't have known Lola." He squeezed his eyes with his index and thumb fingers. "You shouldn't know!" The disappointment that filled him was thick in his voice.

Tiny giggles broke free from Lola's lustrous lips. "So hilarious." She flipped her hair from her face. "My father, of course. He told me. How else would I have known?"

He needed to do something, Joshua thought. His hands trembled on his knees. Palms drenched in sweat. Maybe plead? Go on his knees? Explain why he hid it from her? Or just do something that will make her stay with him. He was not sure life would be easy to live without her. He had to do something.

"I am so sorry, Lola." In a jiffy, he was crouched at her feet, holding her knees. His emotions for the woman before him was raw and ran deep. He could feel them flow through his veins, so true, so pure. He had no plans to ruin a life he wanted to build with her. Lola can be difficult and she have proven to be many times. He was ready to put up with a lot from her. Isn't marriage all about compromising? If begging would make her stay with him, he would beg and do whatever it takes to be with her. "The lies. The deceit. The secrets. I am sorry about them all."

"We lack complete trust in our relationship. It's the reason behind it all. It was never a lie after all. You could have been wiser." Her index finger drummed against her jaw. "You have a very interesting story. The story of your life should be a book. Many might buy it."

His sudden withdrawal could be felt. It was in the way he took his hand off her lap. "That's not funny, Lola."

"I know. How about we find a little bit of humour in this hard time, a time that can destroy our relationship because, Josh, there are a lot we do not know about one another"

Joshua had his head in his hands, thinking about what to do, how he will get himself out of this mess. Many times, he had wanted to tell her, he had plans to but those days never felt like the right time. Had he told her the truth about himself, then they would not be here today. She looked composed but only she knew how much fear she harboured within her and how she wanted to crumble into nothing.

"How's chairman?" Surprise had his eyes broadening. Her mouth curved into a delighted grin. "When next you meet him, tell him I send my regards, Jagaban."

Calling him a name only the dangerous world knew had not knocked him for six as it should. How much does she know about him? "Don't call me that." This time, his voice was low, a sign of his resignation.

"Why? It's who you are. It's what many call you."

"Just don't."

"I like the sound of it. In-da-bos-ki." She pronounced every syllable slowly.

"Lola just stop! Call me Joshua." He looked exhausted.