《In Review》Aunt Betty's Ride Home
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An Unbelievable Story Not For The Squeamish
About 20 years ago, Steve, usually a reliable acquaintance, told of a weirdness while we were comparing weird stories during a competitive drinking session. My stories lost the competition for sure.
"I heard it from my insurance agent."
So he says.
Unbelievable!
After three months or so Aunt Betty's rehab finally showed progress. She could be released to her family with conditions. No stress, no driving, home bound for two months before returning to work.
Seizures controlled now by bio-feedback or something that's a new thing.
Whatever.
Finally released, Betty is joyfully back with her family.
Jim always drives, as brothers-in-law do, just to help somehow. A good guy. Nice car. His wife, Betty's sister Mary, always together at any family gathering and recovering from a bad flu, is in the front passenger seat as always. Betty, helped by husband Bob, is getting in the back seat and ready for life to begin again.
All is well.
They'd gone about two blocks when that began to change.
A trash truck pulls out nearly colliding with Jim's car. Jim slows the pace following the damn thing. Then suddenly out runs a small dog chasing a rabbit. For some reason, they run toward the truck.
Only two blocks from the rehab place and things suddenly get worse.
THUMP!
Oh hell no!
Not...oh no!
The dog hit by the front tire ends up stuck in between the two back tires on the drivers side of the trash truck.
Round and round and round.
Really hard to watch!
As the dog would disappear then appear repeatedly.
Round and round.
Awful!
As the truck reached the speed limit, about thirty mph or so. The dog flew toward Jim's car. It hit the windshield.
Splat!
Then the gooey thing slid down, smearing the glass.
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Betty suddenly convulses violently in the backseat. Bob, holding her, is poked hard in the eye by her long fingernail. Mary in front, just recovering from a bad flu, immediately pukes all over the dashboard, steering wheel, and poor Jim. Jim also pukes while trying to see to drive. Oncoming traffic now appears. His foot slid off the brake. In his wet and blinded terror he hit the gas pedal.
He then swerved off the street into a yard with a fence on the side of a large home.
Wham!
Splash, right into their swimming pool!
No one is in the pool, thank god!
Everyone is covered in family fluids and gooey dog parts were still on the windshield and hood of the car. They are still in the car, which is now flat in the pool.
Bob finally opens Betty's door. Everyone gets out as quickly as possible. Bob, holding the bleeding eye, struggles to get Betty out of the car and pool.
The engine stopped of course. Mary is still gagging, Jim swearing and wiping his face and eyes.
A total disaster had occurred in three blocks of driving Betty home.
Betty gets to her feet. Still shaking, walks through the broken fence and heads back to the rehab place to start all over again!
It is still UNBELIEVABLE!
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