Flashback, coming out:

"I will NOT have you be that way in my house! Under my roof! Thats disgusting, Jahseh!"

"I'm sorry I'm the way I am, mom. I knew you were going to act like this.."

"If you don't change your ways, then you're going to have to be on your own."

"What? I'm only fucking 15..what do you expect me to do on my own? Out of all people I thought you'd be the one to understand."

"I didn't raise my son to be...THAT. You need to leave my house. You're not going to be that way under my roof."

And with that I left. I left my childhood, my family, my friends, my school and education. Everything. Since my mother wanted basically disowned me, it's now what for me.

I'm glad I had Miles though. He helped me. He wasn't gay, but he was part of the few people that didn't mind gay people walking the same ground as him.

I lived with Miles and his family for a little while. Miles family knows me, since Miles is one of my only friends, he was my only hope for asylum.

I cried for weeks. I thought everything would be fine. Miles made me think that, I believed that for a while.

"I'm only fucking 15..and she's just going to do this to me. It-it-its bullshit. I have no money and I have no job and I'm going to die on my own.. I can't depend on other people for he rest of my life.. I fucking hate her." I cried, barely getting the words out of my throat as there was a knot that people always get when they cry.

"Hey, hey...Jah it's okay. Don't think that you're alone...I'm here, and I'm going to always be here with you bro. I don't look at you any differently as before. Gay or not, you're my best friend. You're still Jahseh."

Miles says, rubbing my back in circular motions trying to comfort me. He's always been the one to cheer me up, and pick me up through my hard times. I had a lot of break downs in front of Miles and he always finds a way to calm me down and make me feel better.

"But, Miles...What is everyone going to think? Everyone is going to get weirded out and then- and then-"

"Fuck everyone. Period. You can't always think about what everyone else thinks, because what everyone else thinks doesn't and will never matter. Not even mine. It's what you think about yourself that matters. If you're happy with the way you are, and the skin you're in then that's should be the only option you need." Miles says.

"If someone can't accept you for you, then they don't know any better. People feel it's their duty to judge everyone, but the only person that's able to judge you is you. There's nothing wrong with being you. Fuck what she thinks, fuck what he thinks, fuck what anyone thinks that's otherwise." Miles continues.

Miles can act like a dumbass sometimes, trust me. I've witnessed it many times in my life. But he knows what to say when it's time to say it, this is why I love him so much. He's there when you need him. He's just an on time person, and I adore it.

"Thank you, Miles." I said snuggling, giving him a hug.

He has a way with people, if any bitch were to hurt this man, there's going to be a war. Miles deserves only the best that's coming for him.

"Anytime, man. Just focus on everything and it will all be alright..I promise."

"I promise.."

"I promise.."

"I promise.."

Present Day:

"I promise.."

"I promise.."

That phrase rung in my head for a while. I was so focused on it, I dozed off and didn't know that the smoke alarm was going off.

"Fuck!" I said turning off the stove and grabbing a magazine and fanning the alarm until it stopped beeping.

Well, my chicken is burned and it looks like coal. And it smells like hell. There goes dinner because I wanted to reminisce about my past. I don't think I'd be where I am without Miles, and I had this sudden burst of appreciation for him. I'm just really happy that I know him and he's opened a lot of opportunities for me. And his birthday is coming up so I want him to spend as much time as I can with him this week.

It's 3 in the afternoon and I'm off work and have absolutely nothing to do. The apartment complex I live in is boring as shit because I haven't made any friends..apart from that dumb familiar nigga with the durag that lives a few doors down but I don't even know his name so I wouldn't even consider him my friend. More of an acquaintance. I need to make friends soon.. one day I'm going to move out of this fucking apartment and start trying to do something with my life.

I grabbed a chair and went outside to sit in front of the door and look over the balcony. It was really just the parking lot and the street with a bunch of fast food places and grocery stores. I sit out here to think about what time going do later, or just talk to my brain about shit that's going on.

"I need to change my hair color..this blonde and black is getting a little old..I'll keep it for now until I know what the hell to do." I say to myself, loud enough for only me to hear while twisting my multi colored dreads. I got them a while ago with Miles. We wanted to do something different with our hair for once so we just said fuck it and we got the hair we have today.

"JARED GET THE HELL OFF OF ME." I yelled. Jared and I got in a little dispute about what stripper is hotter: Blac Chyna or Cardi B. "Not until you admit who's queen of stripping." Jared says calmly while sitting on my back. He's a heavy ass motherfucker. I don't know what this nigga has been eating but he's crushing my lungs.

"GAZZY? OMAR? YOU GUYS ARENT GOING TO HELP ME?" I asked gasping for air. "Come on Stokeley, you're like a good 4 inches taller than Jared, you don't need us." Omar says laughing. "Just admit Blac Chyna is a better stripper." Jared says. "No one wants to admit Chyna's metal booty is better than anyone." I manage to say in between me trying to catch my breath. "We're going to be here all day then." "YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN HERE SINCE 11 AM , YOU'VE BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH." I said. "Just ADMIT IT STOKELEY!" Jared says dragging the last syllable. "FINE! FINE, Blac Chyna is a better stripper now get your ass off of me!" I said finally pushing him off of me. Everyone starts to laugh but I'm not because I'm still trying to figure out if one of my lungs collapsed. "Fuck y'all." I said getting up and flipping everyone off and walking tl the door. "Come on, Stoke it's just playful fun!" Gazzy says as I closed the door.

I love those dudes but sometimes they're too much for me, and I need to have a breather from them. I stood over the balcony and just watched the cars go by as my breathing eased over. I felt my pocket for cigarettes but it seemed that I was out. "Goddamnit." I said to myself. I looked over to my side and saw Jahseh sitting on a chair. He seemed very secluded and he seemed like he liked to be alone. I only ever see him with that red haired guy that fools around. They must be really close or something because I've never seen him with anyone else.

He's a fine man..he has face tattoos just like me which is a turn on..wait no. That was gay.

Look, he's just a very good looking guy, he's very short and petite and fit, I could tell. I guess he saw me, he looked over and he waved and motioned me to come over to him.

I walked not too far to him. He was wearing a black revenge hoodie with sweats and some socks and slides. "Hey.." He said. "Hey." I said back. "What are you..uh.. doing out here?" He asked me. "Just looking and thinking about stuff...you?" He took a long pause and looked over. Leaning forward into his chair. "I've been going through a lot of shit..or I've been through a lot of shit..it's been on my mind lately." He says. I went to sit next to him so I can show him that I'm listening. "Like what?" "Identity issues. Family. Money. Law." He says putting his hand into his pocket. "Sometimes all I want to do is just go away. And he numb to everything. I want to go somewhere far away from everybody and figure out why I am the way I am." He explains. I just nod and listen to what he has to say, I hear in his voice that he's HAS been to hell and back with his life. "I lead a troubled life, man. Getting arrested every now and then, family not accepting my lifestyle.. money fucking up my life." "It's going to be okay, Jahseh." I say turning to him. "Everyone always fucking says that and it never does. When is it going to be okay?..I wish I was a teenager again. I wish I could go back to Sophomore year." Jahseh says getting out of his chair and sitting on the ground near me. "Why is that?" I asked.

"Because. In sophomore year, I had happiness. Not for a long time, but I got to experience it while I could. I met these boys. It was my first day at that school. I sat by myself at lunch, I only had my headphones to entertain myself because I didn't have any friends to talk to. These 3 boys came up to me and they were skinny and looked kinda funny but they came up to me. They introduced themselves but I don't remember their names. I know one started with an S though." Jahseh explained. I just nodded through. "They sat in front of me and they just started talking to me. I had no money for lunch so one of the boys gave me half of his sandwich. I refused but he insisted. The other dude gave me his milk and the one that name started with an S gave me his whole tray of food..those 3 boys made my life easier for those next few months. They gave me a reason to get up in the morning and show my face at school." Jahseh explained with tears running down his face. I patted his back as he spoke. "But then it all changed because of my mother. She's the reason I am the way I am, and will stay the way I am." He says wiping his tears. "I'm sorry for rambling on, my friend Miles isn't here for me to vent to. Anyway, how was your evening?" He says. I stutter a little bit but manage to get the words out.

"It was alright... may I ask.. what high school you went to?" He looked over at me and smirked. "Piper High School." He says sniffling. My eyes widened as I stood up quickly. I realized Jahseh was X. The experience with the 3 boys was Gazzy, Omar and I giving him food all that time ago. And that's when he left all of a sudden and we never saw him again until I guess by coincidence, the world brought us back together. It all made sense. It made sense now why the name Jahseh sounded so familiar. "What?" He says confused also getting up. "Do you know who the fuck I am, Jahseh?!" I said basically yelling and shaking his shoulders. He was even more confused than before and dazed from how hard I shook his shoulders. "No..you never told me your name." He said chuckling. "X? You're X! Those three boys was my friends Gazzy and Omar, I'm Stokeley!" I said excitedly. He still seemed so confused a little by everything.

"Wait, so you're telling me, 8 years ago, the 3 boys I met at piper was you and your friends?" He says trying to get everything straight. "Yes!"

"And you're Stokeley?"

"Correct!"

"Oh my god. OH MY SHIT, ITS YOU!" Jahseh says jumping up and down with a smile on his face. We came in for a tight hug while still jumping around in excitement, causing a lot of noise around the complex. We sounded like a bunch of school girls that saw their crush walk by.

"How could I have not noticed it was you living a few doors from me." I say still in shock at how stupid I am for not noticing that the old friend I had so long ago was right here. "You never told me your name when we first reunited." He says in a sarcastic voice. "You never asked." "Nigga it don't matter if I asked or not, you're at least supposed to tell me!" He says back playfully, him and I laughing.

I think about if me and Jared didn't get into that little fight about strippers and I didn't leave to go to the balcony. If I had had cigarettes would I had ever looked over at Jahseh and him wave me over. If he didn't feel comfortable enough to vent about his worries and thoughts about life to me, I would have never realized that the friend that I lost back 8 years ago was him. X was Jahseh and he lived a couple doors down. I believe more now that everything happens for a reason.