《The Lies and the Lives of the Taken》Frank 24

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I see the cafe up ahead and I start walking faster. I can't believe I missed his texts. I hope he's still there. I check my phone as I come to the edge of the sidewalk. I mean, my flight leaves in 6 hours and we finished packing up last night. He said noon and it's 12:30. I'm such an idiot.

I woke up early today to make sure everything was ready and Jenna and I had an early lunch. Right afterward, I fell asleep on the couch and then Jenna decided to throw a blanket over me. Next thing I know, I wake up to 2 missed calls from Gerard and a text saying "Hey, I know this may be a bad time but if you have a moment, I'll be at the cafe at noon. I hope I can see you still."

I woke up ten minutes ago and I replied saying I'll be over soon but he still hasn't responded to me. I approach the cafe and pull open the door and step inside. The warm aroma of coffee overcomes the air and I ease up. I step in, unzipping my jacket and scanning around. My heart starts beating faster when I see him sitting in our usual spot. I quickly walk over to him.

He's staring at his coffee when he looks in my directions. His eyes light up when he sees me and a smile plays on his face. "Frank," he whispers.

I go over to his side, smiling brightly. "Hi," I say softly. His arm is in a sling and he has a crutch with an arm braced for his other forearm that's resting against the wall. "How...are you?"

He puts on a smile for me, his eyes crinkling. His happiness doesn't look as forced as he has been. "I'm taking it easy," he says.

I slide in the chair across from him and look at him intently. "Can I ask you about it?"

"Oh, yeah, that's okay," he says. "I'm okay but the thing is...I don't really remember much." His voice is nowhere near as hoarse when I last saw him but it's still a bit scratchy. It sounds more like he's tired rather than weak.

"What do you remember?" I ask.

He sighs, thinking back. "I was leaving the meeting and I got in the car, it was really late and I remember it was dark. Then the next thing I know, this blinding white light came out of nowhere and it was all I could see," his voice breaks off. "I don't remember getting hit but I remember the headlights were so bright. And the sound of the metals crashing and glass shattering." His eyes are dazed, fading out as the flashbacks hit him. I reach across the table and place a hand on his wrist. He looks up at me and breaths softly. "I heard you came to see me?"

I nod my head, biting my lip but smiling. "Yeah, Monday."

"I'm sorry for-"

"No, it's okay," I say, waving my hands. "I was glad I did see you, although, you gave me a heart attack." He looks at me with sad eyes and I melt. "But you were fine later and they informed me so I wasn't worried this entire time."

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"I heard what happened," he says. "Also, if my coworkers were-um...sometimes they forget how normal people are since everyone there is on caffeine mainstream and always up in your business so."

I chuckle to myself. "It's okay. I mean, Cassidy or Macy...um-your boss was a bit skeptical of me but it was fine."

"Macy," Gerard sighs, "that's just how she is." He takes a sip of his coffee. His hand is shaking and almost struggling to grip the cup and bring it to his lips. He's still weak. I just want to hold him and keep him safe from the world. I want to take care of him and make sure he's okay. I just want Gerard to be okay. Physically and emotionally. Is that too much to ask for? Before the accident, he was so out of it and he looked ill from how stressed he was. Is that why he crashed? "I am sorry I didn't show up."

"What?"

He fixates on the table. "Sunday, I just stood you up and-"

"Gee," I whisper.

Gerard pauses and gives me a look. "It's...I don't think I've heard anyone else call me that," he says surprised.

"Should I not?" I ask.

He shrugs but I see the pain in his eyes from the movement in his shoulder hurting him. "No, no, it's fine," he says. "Just, I think only Brendon calls me that."

"Gotcha," I say. I mean, it was Brendon who I heard call him Gee. "Brendon's...he's nice." Gerard smiles softly. "He really cares about you."

"He's my best friend," he says. "I would hope so."

"Yeah," I say. The memories come back. Gerard wheezing and his body rattling in the bed. It hurt seeing him like that but I also remember Brendon's face. The distress and panic on his face, the pain in his eyes. All when I was with him that day, Brendon was calm and collect, but then suddenly, he was a scared child and his voice whimpering for Gerard to just breathe.

"Frank?" Gerard says gently.

"Um, sorry," I say, shaking my head to get the memories out.

"You good?"

"Yeah," I trail off, "I just...I was really scared for you." My eyes get hot and I grumble, trying to stop acting so overdramatic. I look at him and awkwardly smile. "I know you're okay now but..." I take a breath, easing my heart rate, "This last week has been rough. I thought I wasn't going to see you again before I left but then we ran into each other but you were so worn out. And then I had hope, I don't know what I was expecting, but I was hoping for something on Sunday and-and then...I thought you didn't care about me. But turns out that's not the case and I felt like an idiot and guilty and...I saw you. I saw you choking and shaking and-and I thought you were going to...die," I whisper.

"Hey, look at me." I glance up, staring at his soft green eyes. "I'm right here. I'm with you. I'm okay." A tear falls down my left eye and I turn away. "Frank, look at me." I bite my lip, glancing up but trying to still hide my face. Gerard smiles warmly and seeing that playful happiness eases me. "I'm okay now. I'm with you."

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I smile, wiping my face with my sleeve. "God, I've missed you," I say, laughing under my breath. "You make leaving Austria that much harder."

"Actually," Gerard says, putting his hand on mine. I snap my head at him, staring intently. He smirks at me. "They're sending us home."

"What?"

His smile widens. "Next week, we're on the flight back to the States." I stare at him, waiting for the joke to come but he only breaks into soft laughter. This can't truly be happening. "So we'll only be 3 hours away. And I know that sounds like a lot but it's definitely better than 4,000 miles."

"That's absolutely better," I say. The stars have aligned for me. What are the odds? I mean, sure, we're not going to see each other as often as we used to but we could still see each other.

Gerard swallows, squeezing my hand a bit. "Which, I wanted to talk to you about." He looks me in the eye and I hold my breath. "It's...I've been through a lot this year. I've lost a lot and there's-I'm not going to lie, I had a crisis and it's all suddenly over." He takes a breath, nervously laughing. "I've made a lot of mistakes, and things got pretty bad. But out of all of them, the biggest one was not seeing you for so long."

"What?" I whisper.

"And I know that from my perspective that probably sounds cliche but it's true. Every mistake I made was...yes, they were mistakes but it was the best I could have done in the situation. Except you. I thought it would make things easier to not see you anymore but I was wrong. It made everything harder." He looks back up at me. "I don't know what it is about you but you just...you're presence makes everything okay. And to think if I had died...to think we could have never got to talk and say things that need to be said." My heart is beating faster. He really did have a crisis if he's saying all this. "Frank, I love you."

I break into a smile, my face getting hot. "You-"

"I need you to know that," he says, running his thumb back and forth against my hand. "I can't explain this feeling you give me, this sense of peace and just...wholeness. And after not seeing you for so long, I know now I never want that happen again." My eyes well up again and I look down, the tears dripping on the table. "I'm in love with you, Frank," he whispers. His voice is low and husky. I know it's because he's worn out but the way his voice sounds, saying all these things, saying my name, it's very alluring and seductive.

I look up at him, tears in my eyes and I take a breath. "Gerard, I feel there's a lot I don't know about you but the one thing I am certain about is that I love you too." He breaks into a smile. "Since it seems to be a mutual thing," I say and Gerard laughs, his eyes glistening from happiness too, "and also since we won't be so far away, do you think we can date?"

"Oh, I'd like that," Gerard says.

"So if you pretend to be someone's boyfriend, then six months later you actually become someone's boyfriend." Gerard looks at me and smiles brightly.

Gerard and I catch up on everything that's happened in our lives. Gerard brushes off his work life, curious to hear about my classes and what's happening next. A couple hours pass and I should head out soon so I can have some time before the flight. But I don't want to end it just yet.

The two of us sit at the table, our drinks long finished. The conversation faded down and now we're just staring at each other intently. He smiles gently at me and I just want to kiss his stupid, precious face. "Your pupils are dilating," he says.

I laugh lightly. "Are they?" I mutter, glancing down. Gerard sits back, reaching into his coat pocket and peeking at his phone. "Everything alright?"

"Yeah, just Brendon," he says, taking it out. "He's-" His phone tumbles out of his hand, clattering on the table and bouncing on the floor.

I refrain from laughing as I slide out of the chair and I kneel down and pick it up. I turn the screen over and smile. "Didn't break," I say, looking up at Gerard. "Gerard?" He's staring at his hand concerned. I stand up and slide his phone in front of him. "It's okay," I tell him.

He lowers his hand, glancing at his phone. "Um, thanks," he says, his voice faltering. He clears his throat and glances up at me, putting on a smile. "I've really enjoyed today, I'm glad I got to see you. But I need to head out now." He grabs his phone off the table, gripping it tightly and shoving it back in his pocket.

I nod. "Yeah, I should be going too," I say. "But yeah, I did like this. I'm glad you're better." Gerard nods and he reaches over, grabbing his crutch and sliding his arm through the brace. I hold his side as he stands up. "You didn't walk here, did you?" He lowers his head, smirking. "Gerard-"

"I've been incapacitated for the last few days, give me a break," he sighs. "My legs are fine, just deep gashes on one but I can walk."

"Well, let me at least walk with you," I say, standing up with him.

"I'm fine, really-" he starts.

"Maybe I believe you," I smirk. He parts his mouth but glances at me curiously. "Or maybe I just want to walk with you." He smiles, his gaze falling downward. "Besides, I'm sure this will be the last I'll see my boyfriend for a while." His cheeks flush and he beams at me as the two of us walking out of the cafe together.

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