3 weeks later

i continuously bump my head lightly on the table while reciting these art terms. we have a long test later in one of my arts subjects and i'm having a hard time remembering everything. it's getting hard for me to cope up lately because trainings have been more extreme than usual since were only 2 weeks away from the competition plus, it's midterms 3 days from now so i have to study hard.

i've been physically worn out from all the trainings, mentally drained from studying for the midterm examinations and completing all my requirements... and emotionally tired from a fight with stell which occurred last week and we haven't talked to each other since.

*flashback*

1 week earlier

it's been two weeks since that lunch incident with coach pau and stell's curiosity on why i reacted like that seemed to grow bigger.

we're currently in his condo while he helps me study for some of my quizzes but we stopped for a while to binge watch some shows and talk about some stuff and unfortunately, that event didn't slip past stell's memory.

i said, however, he doesn't seem convinced.

stell paused. i guess he's thinking. he wants to say something but is contemplating whether he should say it or not.

i said in a monotone voice. he shook his head instead.

he said and stood up, taking the empty bowl and glasses to the kitchen area.

i stood up, slightly getting annoyed now. he didn't reply so i followed him. when he placed the dishes on the sink, i held his arm and pulled him to face me.

he said, gently taking my hand away from his arm.

i stared at him in disbelief as he turned around and starting washing the dishes. i breathed deep through my nose, trying my best to calm my nerves down but nothing seems to work anyway.

he said through a calm but authoritative voice.

i saw how stell's shoulders dropped down, him sighing heavily. he turned off the faucet and wiped his hands with a cloth before facing me and leaning his back against the counter.

i snorted. i said, emphasizing the 'I'.

stell replied, pointing a finger towards himself.

shit naman, what have i done?

i didn't answer. i bowed my head low and fidgeted on my fingers, not knowing what to say. i clearly urged him to talk about this but now i feel like i'm the one cornered.

moments later, stell spoke, breaking the unwanted silence enveloping us.

what the fuck.

he asked, calmer and slower this time.

i wish it was just like that.

what????

i don't even know where these words are coming from anymore. i just feel like i'm gonna burst at any moment.

stell raised his voice, slightly making me flinch.

you shouldn't trust a liar like me, stell.

i lowered my head and blinked my eyes a couple of times, trying to prevent the tears that are about to fall from them. i can't take this anymore.

i said in almost a whisper and briskly walked to the living room to get my bag and made my way towards the front porch of his condo.

i stopped in my tracks, holding the doorknob tightly, waiting for stell to call me or hug me from behind.

but he didn't do anything. he just stayed by the sink, watching me leave.