You just lost a loved one. You're torn, broken and in pain - a pain that is so much it lingers, it stings. Tears just fall as soon as that person's name is mentioned or each time his or her thought crosses your mind - same name you used to make du'a for Allah to protect and keep healthy is now the name that you ask Allah to grant ease in his or her grave and to be amongst those Allah would grant a place in Jannah.

We all know, it's excruciatingly and constantly painful. It may be a mother, a father, a spouse or even your own child that you had to bury.

Indeed, how much can one take? With what is happening in this world, we witness a lot of our brothers and sisters who are living in war torn countries suffer by losing a number if not all of their family members in just one glimpse. May Allah grant them ease.

Unimaginable pain indeed, yet we trust in the Qadr of Allah and we move on and we find comfort in His Words and in perfecting our worship.

Yet, here is a story of a person who lost not just anyone in her life but the closest ones in her lifetime - one by one.

If you are married or is getting married - how would you feel or how would you cope losing that person? Terrifying even to think about, right?

Well, Atikah Bint Zaid Radiyallahu Anha had to go through that not only once in her life but four times.

Atikah bint Zayd was the daughter of Zaid bin Amr bin Naufal, a member of the Adi clan of the Quraysh in Mecca and the sister of Sa'id ibn Zayd. As Sa'id was among the earliest to convert to Islam, Atika became a Muslim too. Sa'id ibn Zayd was among the ten people who were promised Paradise by Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and it was he who guided Atiqa to Islam. She was a poet who is notable for having married Muslim men who died as shahids .

Atikah was a beautiful lady and her beauty did not shine only through her physical appearance but also through her character and manners. She was also stern in her beliefs and would voice out for her rights.

At Madina, Atika was married to Abdullah the son of Abu Bakr. Anyone who have read about their love story would agree that they illustrate a very loving relationship. Atika was very beautiful and Abdullah was much enamoured of her. He was so much lost in her love that he failed to participate in the various expeditions undertaken by the Muslims.

The love of Abdullah and Atika became proverbial. Abdullah felt that Atika was the most valuable thing in the world. When Abu Bakr came to know that Abdullah had not taken part in the various expeditions and had even neglected his prayers, he put him to explanation. He had no explanation to offer. The matter of fact position was that he was so much overwhelmed by the love of Atika that he could not attend to other duties. Abubakar Siddiq (RA) commanded Abdullahi to divorce her.

Abdullah was torn between two minds. At times he thought that he should be faithful to his love. On second thought he felt that the command of his father should be obeyed whatever the cost. After three days Abdullah divorced Atika. This decision made Abdullah deranged. He would neither eat nor drink. He sobbed and sighed and sang heart rending verses giving expression to his great grief over the loss of his beloved.

Her absence turned him into a poet. Abdullahi admired her truthfulness and her acceptance of the separation. He uttered verses in her praise and testified that she was a woman of good habits, wisdom, and high moral character, and lamented:

"Oh Atika, I will never forget you, so long as anything appears during the day(meaning the sunrises) ,or any star or any bird flies through the sky at night. I will never forget you day or night and I will always think about you oh Atika. I have never known a man like me divorce a woman like her, nor any woman like her divorced for no fault of her own."

When Abu Bakr heard this, and saw how much he loved her, he sympathized with Abdullah and asked him to reconcile with her again.

Abdullah was very particular thereafter to ensure that the love for Atika did not stand in the way of his duty to God. They loved each other so much to the extent he gave her a share of his wealth (a garden) and made her vow that she would not marry anyone after him. In all the campaigns that were undertaken by the Holy Prophet thereafter, Abdullah took part therein, and fought valiantly. In the siege of Taif, Abdullah was wounded, and later he died of such wounds at Madina.

It was now Umm Atika's turn to utter verses in praise of her husband. She called him the best man after the Prophet (sa) and Abu Bakr (ra) and praised his gallantry in wars.

Atika bitterly mourned the death of Abdullah, and in a touching elegy she said:

"Abdullah I have sworn that my eyes

Shall not cease grieving over you;

And my body shall ever remain,

Covered with dust."

Meaning she vowed that she would never beautify herself for another man again. Basically she is going to spend the rest of her life mourning him and would not marry any one after him.

Umar felt for her. He felt distressed that one so young and beautiful should remain a widow. Umar advised her that she shauld marry. When Umar became the Caliph, he himself offered to marry her. He told her that she had been wrong to renounce her right to remarry and denying herself what Allah has permitted. After some hesitation, Atika accepted the proposal.

During the wedding night, Aisha and some narrations say Ali congratulated Umar, and sought his permission to talk to the bride. Umar permitted and Aisha reminded Atika of her resolve not to marry any one after Abdullah and then she advised her to return the garden to Abdullah's family (the garden which was given to her by her husband Abdullah in a condition she should never marry anyone apart from him). Umar told Atiqa to return the land. He settled an equivalent sum of money on her, which she distributed in alms to expiate the breaking of her vow to Abdullah.

Atiqa used to ask Umar's permission to attend public prayers at the mosque. Umar preferred his wives to remain at home and expressed his displeasure with silence. Atiqa told him that she was not going to stop asking permission, and that she would go to the mosque unless he specifically forbade her. He remained silent, presumably because he could not forbid something that prophet Muhammad(saw) had permitted, and so Atiqa continued to attend.

From her marriage to Umar, Atika had a son Ayaz/Iyad.

She was present at the Mosque when Umar was assassinated there in November 644. She composed a poem for him.

After the martyrdom of Umar , Umm Atikah said elegiac poetry in his memory. She remembered him as someone with a radiant face, who recited the Quran, who turned to Allah (swt), who was kind to the weak and strong against the enemy, and who was steadfast in trials and agreeable. In his speech, she found no contradiction. He would hasten to give charity and did not deal with callousness.

After Umar's martyrdom, Zubair Ibn Al Awwam made the move and proposed to Atikah. She married Zubair with quite some interesting conditions that she laid out. She made it a condition of their marriage contract that he would continue to permit her to visit the mosque at will and that he would not withhold "any of her rights"

Zubayr regretted permitting her to attend public prayers and tried to discourage her. She retorted: "Are you so jealous that you want me to forsake a place where I have prayed with the Prophet, Abu Bakr and Umar?"

Then Az-Zubayr was martyred, and It was at this point that people began to say:

"Let a man who wants to be a shahid marry Atiqa bint Zayd!"

Ali himself proposed to her, but she told him, "I would not want you to die, O cousin of the Prophet.

At this point, she decided that she would never marry anyone else, for fear that he too would be martyred. She once said, "If I were to marry all the inhabitants of the earth, they would all be killed." She was given the affectionate name "Zawjah Ash-Shuhada" - the wife of the martyrs....

She was not married to any mere kind of men - just see the line of men she was married to, they were men of the battlefields - two of her husbands were amongst those who were promised Jannah.

Subhan'Allah. Indeed, how much can a soul take?

Remember how our beloved Prophet ﷺ said: "Great reward comes with great trials. When Allah loves a person, He tests them, and whoever accepts it attains His pleasure, whereas whoever shows discontent with it incurs His wrath."

Atikah is a great example of this hadith. She was tested with a great calamity that not every soul can handle. What great deed has she done for Allah to raise her status like this through testing her this way. What a great lady she was.

We, indeed, find many people (even Muslims) walk or revert to another path once they lose their spouse or someone closest to them.

Atikah was no mere woman, she was a woman of great status and this was all because of her perseverance, her faith and the way she accepted the Qadr of Allah.

She died in 672 AD, during the reign of the Umayyad Caliph Muawiyah I.