It was wrong. The moment it started, she knew something wasn't right. But she didn't know what in seven hells was wrong, only that certain things were not adding up.

Livia was in Casterly Rock once again after so many years, the smell of seawater and the white structures were still so fresh in her memories.

She was seated by the cliffside, the cliffside that she spent most of her childhood playing in, surrounded by people as if they were all in celebration. There were the distant sounds of children laughing and of a lute playing joyful music.

"Livvy, is everything alright?" A concerned voice asked as she looked around in confusion.

Livia turned to see Jaime, no longer donning his Kingsguard attire, instead wearing a plain tunic and breeches, looking so carefree, so happy. "Yes, I-I was just looking for something."

He laughed, making her laugh with him even if she did not know the reason. "I'm sure he's just right around here somewhere."

"Who?" She asked, her brows scrunching.

"Your husband, of course." He replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Jaime left to go to Cersei's side and Livia stood from her spot, seeing a familiar head of raven hair.

"Elia?" She called out, surprise evident in her tone, her chest tightening in unexplainable grief.

Why was she suddenly so upset?

Elia turned around and ran to her, pulling her into a warm embrace, making her forget her grief. "Livia! I'm so happy for you!"

"I don't understand, Elia, how...what's happening? What are we celebrating?" Livia questioned.

Elia looked so beautiful, her complexion warm and her eyes shining, her smile so wide that it occupied most of her face.

"You just got married! Why shouldn't we be celebrating? Look, even Rhaegar's here!" Elia grinned, pointing to the Targaryen prince, playing the lute.

Aegon and Rhaenys played on the ground, not far from their father who watched them with adoring eyes.

"But my husband, where is he?" Livia asked, only for her to feel a strong arm wrap around her waist.

"Right here." A familiar voice, sounding all too proud of himself.

Livia's head turned to see the source of the voice, her eyes widening and her mouth falling open in shock.

"Oberyn?"

"Hello, my precious lioness. Did you miss me?"

Liva looked from Elia to Oberyn to Rhaegar and back to Oberyn, pushing him away from her. "No, don't."

It was wrong. All of it, it was all wrong. Even the fast pace of her heart was wrong. She couldn't breathe, there wasn't enough air to take in.

"Livia, what's wrong?" Oberyn reached for her but she twisted away from his grasp, choking on her breaths.

She fell to her knees, her hands on the rough rocks when someone pulled her up by her hair. She cried out in pain, tears in her eyes.

She screamed and was faced with the familiar fury of the Mad King, his ragged, dirty face glaring at her.

Suddenly she was back in the throne room, the dark room with dragon skulls and his hands were at her throat.

She couldn't breathe. She couldn't brea...She coul...She c...Sh.......

Then darkness. Nothing.

°•°•°•°•°•°

Livia awoke, gasping, trying to take a full breath. The air filled her lungs with ease, as she breathed hard.

Breathe. You are alive. He didn't kill you. He tried to but he failed. You are alive and he is not.

She turned to the side of the bed, reaching her hand out. "Robert?"

Only to be met with empty sheets.

She looked around the room with a start, still breathing heavily, to see it as empty as the bed had been.

The solar was empty, as well as the balcony Robert had been in moments before she drifted to sleep.

The bed looked as if only her side had been slept in which would mean that he never got into bed.

But where in seven hells was he? Had he slept in another room?

Or maybe he had just started the day early?

But after the amount of wine he drank the day before, that was an unlikely event.

Robert had his own life and she should respect that, just as she swore she would do.

Even then, Livia could not help the smallest twinge of pain at being left alone on the morning after their wedding night.

She felt abandoned, she felt used, she felt...dirty. As if his words were just a mere trick to get her into bed with him.

In her own thoughts, she felt as if she had been punched in the gut.

Was she so desperate for affection from her husband that she would give herself to him in bed when he would just abandon her so easily?

After all, that was what he had wanted from her from the day they had met. Even then, he had tried his advancements on her and now that he succeeded, he had lost interest.

Livia wrapped the blanket around her tightly, the nightgown not being enough to shield her from such thoughts.

No. She would not dwindle what remained of herself because of this. He was her lord husband, they had made a deal.

Respect and understanding. But love was not a part of that deal, there is to be no love and no matters of the heart. She should make that clear to herself and nothing should change it.

Livia stood from the bed and rang for servants to bring breakfast to the chambers, the blanket still around her.

In a flurry too fast for her to comprehend, servants rushed in and out of the chambers, changing the sheets and bringing a breakfast of bread, jams, cakes, breakfast meats, and at her request, some warm tea.

After indulging herself with the honey cakes and the sweet tea, she rang for her ladies.

They prepared a warm bath and helped her into a simple gown, twisting her hair in a simple style.

Just when they were about to leave, Livia called out to one of them. "Wait! Lady Lydden?"

The young girl turned around, bowing. "Yes, Your Grace. Is there anything I can do for you?"

Swallowing all her pride and hurt, Livia spoke. After all, she did have to know. "The king, do you know where he has gone."

Lady Lydden, who had become one of her ladies, nodded."Yes, Your Grace. He did not say where he was going to anyone but him and the Kingsguard rode early in the morning, I presume to go hunting.

At those words, all hope had rushed out the window leaving behind only despair.

Looking down, Livia frowned. "I see. Thank you Lady Lydden."

The young girl reached for Livia's hand and she let her. "Do not fret, Your Grace. I'm sure he will be back soon and the moment he arrives, I promise to tell you immediately."

Livia smiled but as Lady Lydden left, the smile left her face, replaced by a frown reflecting her treacherous heart.

°•°•°•°•°•°

"Will things be alright now?"

"Of course, it will, father." Livia answered as her father prepared to leave, the horses neighing in the background.

"Where is he?" Lord Tywin asked, not specifying any name but she knew who he spoke of.

"Hunting." She said, trying to ignore the bitterness she felt.

Robert had vanished for about two days now, with no word whatsoever on where he had gone. Lord Arryn had been furious, with no king to preside over the council meetings, it was up to him to do so.

Sometimes, when she was curled up in their bed alone, the moments where she felt the most lonely, she had wondered if that was to be her fate for the rest of her life. She had even considered moving into her own chambers but some part of her wanted to wait for Robert, hoping he would return.

It seemed her father had noticed the bitter bite at her tone as he replied. "You did not expect him to love you, did you?"

Another punch at her gut, as if she was truly unlovable.

"No, I did not. But I thought he would have respected me and still done his duty to the realm." Livia said, her eyes meeting anywhere but her father.

"Kings are not known to give respect, that is why they are king. Do your duty, provide him with an heir, perhaps then he would give you the respect you want." Lord Tywin advised, climbing his horse and giving his daughter one more look.

"I do not wish to be used in that manner, I am not Rhaella Targaryen." She said, each word dragging in frustration.

"No, you are not. You're my daughter." Her father said, about to turn away before giving one more piece of advice.

"Stop searching for the respect and adoration you dream of. Make them respect you, make them love you, and maybe then you can gain what you wish for."

With those final words, Lord Tywin turned around with his retinue leaving to go back to Casterly Rock, not knowing the pain he caused his daughter.

Livia pasted a pained smile on her face. She had thought she had finally done the one thing to make her father proud, to marry and become queen when it did nothing.

Nothing could ever satisfy her father's ambition.

Maybe that was her curse, to disappoint all the people in her life. First, Elia, then her father, and most of all, Robert who couldn't even stand to be in her presence after their wedding night.

How could she be queen when all she'd done all her life was to disappoint everyone?

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