A huge thank you for the beautiful aesthetic collage !

• • •

"Mama there is a princess

sleeping on the bed"

A voice whispered through the darkness. Almost as if it was a beacon of light, ushering for me to come back. To look again. Yet no matter how much I tried, my soul was chained and my heart held a prisoner.

I was awake yet in wasn't seeing. Caught in the web of paralysis, I felt the events from the past two days flash before me. The tears, the heartache and the longing of home and no matter how much I tried. I couldn't voice my pain. I wanted to scream, so loud that even the world wouldn't be able to turn deaf ears.

" She's crying again Mama"

The little girls voice reached my ears as I felt a small hand flicker past my shoulder and ever slowly towards my face.

" It's okay. Don't cry"

The child's voice spoke again as I tried opening my eyes. Trying to escape the feeling of my mouth being clasped shut and a heavy weight laying on my chest.

Darkness was slowly creeping from the corner of my eyes. I tried moving, tried to call out for the little girl but no sound came out. My body was paralysed and the only sound I could make was my shallow breathing. Praying, for someone to hear me.

It was as though I was falling in a dark hole, in to oblivion. My stomach churned and my heart beat was now erratic as I found myself back in that room again.

Staggering backwards my eyes instinctively rolled towards the large bed. Seeing the lifeless body laying down. The striking blue eyes that once blinked with life now stared lifeless. The spark long gone.

The man's pale face had small dots of blue forming across. As paramedics rushed around.

The world was twisting and turning and there were screams everywhere but all I wanted, was to scream for him to wake up. He can't leave me. He has to come back. He has to take me away from here.

" Farya, wake up. Please"

A voice suddenly spoke in the darkness as I felt a hand hold on to my back. Shaking me awake.

" Farya it's okay"

The voice reassured clinging on even tighter. I could feel the nightmare dissolve away, till all that remained was utter darkness whilst my heavy lids tried to flicker open. The first sound I was greeted was heart wrenching sobs echoing across the room.

The very sound of the pained lullaby chilled my bones. Trying to blink the tears, I urged to find the bearer of pain till it dawned upon me.

Those were my sobs.

" Stop. Please" I cried hoarsley feeling a hand on my back. The impact causing the fabric from the dress to plunge even further on the open wounds.

" I'm sorry. I mean no harm-"

" My back"

I cried feeling fat tears roll down my face. Glancing at my position, I realised I was laying on my chest and not on my back. How I had managed to fall asleep in this strange room and strange bed, I knew not but all I wanted was someone to take the dress off my body. The fabric had already rubbed against my wounded flesh more than enough.

" What's wrong"

Elif's soft voice murmured as I tried sitting upwards. My arms now numb from all the pain. Turning around, my eyes landed on the beautiful woman before me, seeing a frown on her face.

" Can you help me, please"

I whispered feeling my throat construct, a sad look crawled the woman's face as she stared at me.

The daughter of the man, who killed her husband.

A long silence fell upon us and I could see it in her eyes. The hesitation beside she nodded and gently reached towards my zipper.

Sucking in a breath, I felt the woman's shaky hands reach towards my shoulders before she slowly held on to the zipper. Pulling it down.

A loud gasp escaped the woman's lips as she probably stared at my back. Her fingers that were on my shoulder suddenly turned utterly cold as she tried pulling the zipper down, all the whilst trying to not cause any further damage to the open wounds. Yet the damaged had already been done.

" God have mercy"

The woman stuttered as she stood up and walked towards the small cupboard. Holding a peach dress in her arms. Walking towards me, I could see the woman's face paling as she avoided any eye contact. Probably disgusted at the sight of me.

" Here, try this on. We have some guests. Moustafa said to come down or he'll take you down" She spoke in almost apologetic manner before placing the clothes on the bed.

Turning around, the woman rushed out of the room. Her face still pale, probably never used to the sight before. I could hear the sounds of the door closing as I sat there on the bed. Feeling cool air fan against my exposed back.

Almost emotionless, I felt my eyes flicker on the long peach dress, for as long as I could. Slowly looking away from the clothes and towards the room around, I realised night had fallen on us. The world had continued yet I was still stuck in this nightmare.

Closing my eyes tightly, the events of the days played before me. The wedding. Emre. Moustafa. Abi and hamza.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I heard Murat's voice ringing in my ears.

He called Abi a murderer. That he had killed Hamza, and a part of me wanted to scream. To yell at him, Abi wasn't a murderer but right now. I longer knew the man I once called father.

Standing up, my shaky hands tugged down on the dress feeling it pool around me as the cold air fanned against my exposed skin. Reaching towards the flimsy material I found myself pulling it down my head. My arms aching in the process.

Biting back a sob, the dress fell easily across my body. Fitting perfectly as if it had known each angel by heart. Reaching towards my wedding dress, I pulled the heavy garment upwards feeling my eyes flicker across the expensive material. The lace embroidery and the silk fabric falling perfectly against each other.

This dress was worth thousands, that I knew, but I also knew that the longer I stared at it. The harder it became for me breath knowing I was forced to wear it. Knowing my parents were ready to seal me away in white wrapping, as one does at the time of death.

Shuddering at the thought, my gaze flickered towards the bathroom and then onwards to the small makeup bag Elif had left me. Standing up, my wobbly knees made it enough to the bathroom till I felt my knees given in. Holding tightly on to the magnificent sink I felt my stomach turn at the sight of my face.

Bile raised at the back of my throat seeing my swollen cut lip staring back at me. Tracing my hand across my face, as if to decipher it was really me. I felt warm tears flow down.

Dark purple and blue was spread across my cheekbones and lower jaw making me close my eyes tightly. Feeling my body shake from the tears.

Why am I being punished

I whispered finding myself turn the tap on and splash cold water on to my face. Glancing down at the makeup bag, I reached towards the foundation and concealer seeing my bruises hide away. The sight hiding from all eyes.

Placing kohl liner and some faint lipstick, I brushed my hair leaving it down before placing the loose veil between my hair. And throughout the process, tears trail it's way down. Hoping and praying for a miracle to happen but there was none. The only person that could have helped me was six foot under.

Noursheen had taught me how to style my headscarf hence I knew how to, I thought feeling my gaze flicker across it. Just the thought of the woman had tears burning my eyes.

Oh Nourie, where are you.

A sudden knock on the door had me tensing. Sucking in a sharp breath I opened the bathroom door seeing Elif stand awkwardly in the room. Her large eyes flashing around.

As soon as her eyes landed on me, I could see them widen as she stared at me. A small smile playing on her lips.

" You look beautiful"

Elif commented admiring as I felt my gaze travel from the woman to a small version of her. I remained utterly motionless seeing the small girl stare at me with her large green eyes and her blonde hair tied in a ponytail. She was wearing a pink dress and much like the colour of her garments her cheeks radiated the same as she gave me a small wave.

Smiling back at the girl, she left her mother's side and ran out of the room causing Elif to smile longing at the site where her daughter was. The sudden thought of the little girl not meeting her father because of mine made my stomach turn. Making me tense.

" We have some guest at this odd hour but I think they couldn't wait for another day" Elif spoke slowly, as I glanced at the woman. Admiring her for her beauty and elegance. How was she able to look at me in the eyes and smile kindly when I was the offspring, of a man who ruined her life.

" I'm sorry for my reaction earlier. I hope I didn't offend you. It's just, I was so shocked. I'm sorry" She spoke and in that moment it felt as though Elif was Nourie and all I wanted was to hug her tightly, to cry to her, to tell her about the pain, about the wounds not on just my back but in my soul yet instead I forced a smile and nodded at her.

" I'll take you to the doctors tomorrow. Your back needs looking at" She commented making me nod yet my mind wasn't on that. My mind was on running away from her, from all this. From this world and it's cruelty.

Elif led me out of the room and towards the stairs where I could hear people talking and the sound of laughter reaching my ears. Tensing, I glanced worriedly towards Elif seeing the woman give me a reassuring smile as she stepped forward and I behind her.

" I've made some tea. When you walk in, greet them and you can then always come out" The woman spoke as we walked inside the kitchen seeing a silver tray with some tea and a few nuts in a bowl.

Reaching towards the tray, I felt a small hiss rip from my mouth feeling my back ache and my muscle burn.

Elif reached forward, in attempts to help me but I held the tray giving the woman a tight smile. As if to say I'm okay, when deep down I was dying.

The woman walked inside first and I followed in after her. As soon as I stepped inside the room. The conversation died down and I felt all eyes on me. Overwhelming me.

My eyes flickered across the magnificent room. The interior design of it being gold with rich maroon carpets and crown like chandelier hanging above. Glancing around, my gaze landed on a woman sitting down on the sofa. A red veil across her face as she assessed me from head to toe. Giving me a smile.

Beside her sat the woman from earlier, my supposed mother in-Law whose face twisted in anger at the sight of me.

Walking towards them, I placed the tray of tea in front of them. Seeing Elif reach out and hand them out to everyone. Making me thank the woman mentally.

The air in the room suddenly stifled and even if the rest of the people didn't feel it. I could. My heart beat became erratic and the hair at the back of my neck rose.

Glancing over my shoulder, I felt my eyes flicker towards Moustafa who had just walked inside the room. His dark grey eyes looking around till they finally landed on me.

Sucking in a breath, I felt my heart hammer in my chest seeing his eyes land on me before they travelled down my body. A dark look playing across his eyes. A look of appreciation. Nodding his head slightly, I could see his eyes soften before he cleared his throat and looked ahead.

" Moustafa, I do have to admit. Your bride is beautiful. Young bride- do you know how many women in the village now hate you" The woman with the red veil spoke making me tense. My eyes widening at the confession from the woman.

" Everyone has been after this crazy boy. You are very lucky" She laughed glancing at the woman beside her, who gave a tight smile. Clearly not amused.

" Zeynep we should get going. It's quite late" A voice came from the doorway as my gaze landed on to the bearer seeing an elderly man standing next to Moustafa, as he urged for the woman to get up.

" Of course"

Zeynep commented as she stood up, still wearing her coat; before she re-adjusted her scarf and walked forward.

" Esma you are a very lucky woman, with Elif and now your new bride" The woman spoke patting, Esma, Moustafa's mother who nodded agreeing with the woman. Yet even her fake smile didn't do any justice.

" We shall find a bride for Murat now"

Zeynep commented as my gaze flickered towards the man seeing his jaw tighten. His eyes suddenly flashed towards Elif, an unknown look playing in them all the whilst the woman remained oblivious as she smiled down at her daughter.

That's weird

" I'll see you out " Moustafa spoke whilst Elif and I remained in the room seeing Murat walk with them. An eerie like silence played around us. Almost stifling and all I wanted was to run away and never come here again.

" Bride, take these"

Esma commented as she pointed towards the tray making me glance at her and then towards the tray. Unable to say anything, I nodded walking towards the tray seeing the bowl of nuts fall on to the floor.

" Pick them as well" The woman spat making me tense but nonetheless remain quiet. The sooner I get this done. The sooner I can leave.

Bending downwards I reached towards the almonds and pistachios on the floor before gathering them with my hands.

They say there comes a moment when you can feel something happening just before it does. Almost as if the universe is preparing you for it but you're too late to notice, till it happens.

" Esma mother, No"

I could feel scorching hot substance splash on my back all of a suddenand the horrified cry of Elif reaching my ears. It took me a moment to realise my skin was burning as I shot upwards. My body shaking in pain and my flesh melting.

A heart wrenching scream filled around me as the world spinned. The dress that I wore now clinged tightly on to my open wounds as I felt my eyes snap upwards at Elif who ran towards me.

" Moustafa"

A voice called as I felt my voice become fainter and fainter. The ability to make out any words leaving me. My vision was becoming blurry by the passing second as my knees gave in.

Through my blurry vision, I stared at Moustafa rushing inside the room. A dark look on his face till his eyes landed on me and a whirlwind of emotions played through them.

It happened all too fast as the man rushed towards me. His strong arms wrapping around my waist.

" Farya" A deep voice whispered beside me as I felt Moustafa reach towards my hand and pull me away. Away from them all.

It almost felt like a dream, better yet a nightmare as I found myself being lifted upwards in Moustafa's arms who then proceeded to take me upstairs. His words sift voice reaching my ears but making no sense at all.

Staring at him with tear filled gaze, his face turned in a pained one before it became emotionless as he held me tightly.

" Farya take your clothes off "

The man spoke the minute we walked inside the room. Taking me towards the bathroom, the man easily helped me to my feet. Opening my mouth I tried forming any words but nothing came out. All that happened were large tears falling down my cheeks as the man stared at me. His face flashing with pain.

Turning me around, he easily reached towards the buttons. Pulling it down I felt my front press against the wall as the man ripped the back of the dress. His hands stilling on my shoulders.

" Farya who did this?"

He growled, an unnatural like sound coming from his mouth as I felt the tears run down my cheeks. A low cry ripping from my mouth.

It was almost like a storm. It started off quietly and gradually got louder and louder by the second, till all I could hear were heart wrenching cries echoing against the large bathroom.

" Farya " The man whispered as I felt him turn the water on. The cold droplet making my body tense. I was aware that I was dressed in my undergarments. The black clothing clinging on to my pale skin and he could easily take advantage, but there was nothing in me to fight him.

" Leave me"

I whispered my back facing the man. Not wanting him to look at me more than he should. It was him, it was all his fault. He did this to me.

" I'm not leaving you"

" I hate you"

I suddenly muttered feeling the man tense behind me. His warm breath fanning against my exposed shoulders.

" I know"

He spoke softly as his nose slowly nuzzled against my skin making me move away from him. Turning around, I stared at his cold grey eyes seeing them flash with hundreds of emotions.

" You did this. You tricked me " I uttered the words I had been longing to whisper. He deceived me. It was all because of him. He did this to me.

" Tell me how I tricked you Farya?"

The man spoke with a thick accent, his hands cupping my face before he leaned. His forehead inches away from mine.

I felt tears run down freely on my face, now masked with the cold, water running down.

I could see his eyes soften, almost as if someone had slapped him across the face, as I spoke. My words barely a whisper but I knew he had heard it.

" You were supposed to save me"

• • •

Oh Farya!

I know it's a little late- but it's here. I hope you're all liking the

updates.

Please let me know what you think.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read.