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I woke up at 2 in the morning. Still in our original position, I'm in the arms of P'No. I woke up slowly, afraid to wake him up. I got up and sat leaning against the back of the bed so I could be more satisfied looking at him. I admit, I'm really selfish. During this time I only thought about how to get close and make P'No mine. The incident that night was also spontaneous, completely out of plan. Even though I admit I feel happy afterwards. I also realize that I always take advantage of P'No goodness. During those time I don't care about anything as long as I can always be with P'No. But the conversation before made me doubtful. I'm not worried about my feelings for him. Even if my feelings change, it only changes to become bigger, never decreases at all.

I really love P'No, or rather I say, I need him. I swear that I will make he happy whatever it takes. But now, I made him feel guilty like this. I had seen P'No feeling sad and crying, but the look he had last night was very different from the usual look of his sadness. There is sadness, fear and guilt in it. And I know, I'm the cause.

I just wanted to make P'No happy and be happy because of P'No, but it turned out that it actually made P'No feel very guilty. Knowing how 'responsible' P'No is for anything, I know that P'No will not be able to forgive himself easily.

I should have left him so that he will released from his burden and let him enjoy his life as before, who was happy without me, but I really couldn't. For the past 3 years, P'No is my reason to continue living. Just imagining I can see P'No every day, enough to make me dare to start the day. If I have to let him go, what will happen to me?

I kept looking at him until I realized that my tears flowed. I'm confused, what should I do ??? If I force him to be with me, he will continue to be haunted by that guilt and I don't know how to help him. But if I give in, how can I get to living my life ??

My handsome P'No. My cute P'No. My good P'No. My angel P'No.

The longer I look at him, the more my heart hurts. Knowing that my benevolent P'No must bear all of this himself. Resist guilt and try to accept me as his lover as a sense of responsibility. I'm sorry, P'No. Forgive my selfishness. Forgive me because I can't let you go. Forgive me.......

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As ussual, I woke up at 5 am but I was surprised to see Kengkla sleeping in a sitting position beside me. His eyes were slightly swollen and there were marks of tears on his cheeks.

"Nong Kla crying? Why? Is it because of my story last night that made him feel guilty for me ??? Aiisshh 'No, why are you so stupid? You destroyed the future of a kid as good as Nong Kla, now you hurt him with your problems," I said to myself .

I can't bear to wake him up. I still don't know why this kid can be crazy about me like this. 3 years is not a short time to hide his feelings. I thought about what Kengkla felt when I was gathering with my friends all this time. Because I am very close to them, skinship is not a strange thing for us. Even though we were just 'dating' for a few weeks, I realized Kengkla's possessiveness in me. Kengkla almost never left me alone. Apart from being in class and while sleeping at night, Kengkla is almost always with me. I also realized that every time we gathered with my friends, he was always protective and seemed to mark me as his.

Thinking about it, Kengkla's attitude towards me was very similar to Tin's attitude towards the albino monkey. The difference is that Tin is always acted cold to everyone, while Kengkla is very polite to everyone, especially to my friends. Actually, some of my friends have said that Kengkla's eyes are so scary that they don't dare to get close to me if there is Kengkla. But I never once saw Kengkla's frightening eyes. His eyes always sparkled and a smile never left from his lips. I'm sure my friends are just making it up. How could the prospective doctor as handsome, as good and as polite as Kengkla look scary ??

And according to Nic's story, Kengkla always gets the best score. His parents must be very proud of him, unfortunately Kengkla has closed his heart to them. Kengkla always said that he hated his parents. But isn't that what makes his life feel lonely? All the good values ​​and achievements he got so far, what if not to make his parents proud? Then, for whose parents work and make money and prepare for the best future if not for their only child? The three of them try to make their loved ones happy, in their own way. But they always run from the happiness they should have.

I've heard a little about the problems of the Tin's and Pete's families. Then now I know the problem of Kengkla's. Is the life of all rich people like that? But now Ae has made Pete's life happy and Can who has changed Tin's life. Can I change Kengkla's life to be as happy as Tin and Pete ???

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After watching Kengkla for a while and lost in his mind, he decided to get up and make breakfast for both of them, because Nic didn't seem to come home last night. But when he got downstairs, he saw the youngest slept on the couch.

Techno decided not to wake up his little brother. He planned to wake him up later for breakfast. Techno smiled remembering Kengkla's words last night, about Ai Nic who threatened Kengkla if Kengkla hurt him. Kengkla was right, the two broters really love each other even in different ways. They will stand together if anyone makes a problem with another brother. One small thing that Kengkla never felt, as an only child and don't have many friends.

Fortunately, Mae has left some food, so Techno just needs to warm it up. He just added a sandwich afraid if Kengkla would be unusual with Mae's home-made food.

The time is 7 o'clock when Techno completes his task. He immediately approached the sofa where Technic slept and woke him up.

"Ai Nic .... Ai Nic .... Wake up ......"

Techno tried several times until finally Technic wakes up.

"Eehhmmm .... Phi ... Why are you waking me up ?? I'm still sleepy ..."

"Wake up first. Phi has warmed the breakfast. Let's have breakfast first. After that you can continue sleeping in your room."

"Phiii ... I'm not hungry yet. I just want to sleep ..."

Shortly after finishing saying those words, Ai Nic's stomach rang loudly.

"Your stomach can't lie, Ai Nic. Hurry up and wake Kengkla in my room. Invite him to have breakfast together."

"What ?? !!!! Ai Kla slept in your room ???," Technic immediately got up to hear his brother's words.

"Yes," Techno answered innocently.

"You ... no no ... He ... What did Ai Kla do to you last night? Did he force you to sleep with him? Did he force you to do something, Phi ???," Nic asked anxiously .

"He did ask to sleep with me, but he didn't force me. I allowed it. And take it easy, he didn't do anything to me last night."

"Is he really not doing anything, Phi?"

"What should he do, Ai Nic ?," he asked confusedly.

"No, Phi. It's nothing. Alright, I will wake him up."

Techno just shrugged his shoulders to see his brother's behavior.

"They are really close," Techno thought with a smile.

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Technic is confused to see Kengkla's sleeping position. Or rather, Kengkla's sitting position. Why is he sleeping while sitting? Did P'No told him to do that ??

"Ai Kla ... Ai Kla ... Wake up ..."

It didn't take long for Technic to wake the Young Master.

"Ai Nic, what are you doing here? I told you not to go home tonight !!!," he asked irritably.

"Stupid Kla!!!! It's almost 7:30 in the morning. It's been changing days. And just for your info, I just came home at 4 am. So, I have carried out your orders to stay outside tonight, Young Master Kengkla," he replied sarcastically .

"Oh, that's how it is. Eh ... Where is my wife ???? Did you throw him away ????," Kengkla asked when he realized that P'No was not in bed.

Technic hit the back of Kengkla's head, tried it to wake him up.

"Stupid !!! How can I drive him out of his own room ??? He told me to wake you up and take breakfast together. Now he is waiting for us below. So, quickly lift your ass and go to the dining room. I don't want to hear my brother's scolding about food that gets cold because it waits for us to come down. "

Without being told twice, Kengkla immediately descended from the bed and then half-ran to the dining room. There, his favorite P'No is waiting. When Techno heard footsteps, he turned and saw Kengkla walking towards him.

"Good morning, Nong Kla. Come on, lets have breakfast together."

What Techno didn't realize, he smiled broadly when he said it, making Kengkla's world seem to stop spinning and focus on that smile, on the existence of Techno.

After all this time, this was the first time Kengkla was greeted with a good morning smile at the dining table. And once again, Kengkla fell in love with Techno.

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I don't know how you feel about reading this chapter, but I cried when I wrote the Kengkla POV section. I imagine war in his heart.