A sulky Tripp was never a good sign. It meant solitude and eerie quietness and loneliness. When Tripp was sulky, he often requested time alone. Therefore it didn't come as a surprise when I woke up to a empty bed, and a note;

Studying at the library, I'll be back for the appointment.

It was obvious. Why didn't he just text me? Because texting would invoke a response from me, the complete opposite of what he wants. I huff, rolling away from the note and hugging his pillow to my chest. Tripps recent behavior was off-putting. It wasn't clear or evident. He still showed his affection, but he was more cautious with how he handled me, more hesitant.

To say that it annoys me is an understatement.

A groan leaves me as I will myself out of bed, stomping into the shower and completing my morning routine. As much as I want to listen to Tripp and his unsaid need to be alone, another part of me wants to simply go out and look for him, ask him what's wrong, reassure him till he can do nothing more but believe me.

Yes, I convince myself, I'll get down to the bottom of it before my appointment.

_________

I manage to find Tripp as I exit my final class of the day. Sneaky as always, he was going through the other hallways of the building, carrying a load of books. There's a guy chattering with him animatedly, pink and blue and overall pastel clips and bracelets adorning his hair and wrists.

He's cute, in a comic character kind of way, and his eyes grow large as Tripp replies to him. I take that as my chance to swoop in, catching them both off guard as I nudge into Tripp's side.

Their eyes flicker to me, and my gaze narrows as Tripp's eyes avoid mine - instead looking at the bottom half of my face. He gives me a wavering smile, "Hi Logan,"

"Hi yourself morning ditcher." I smile towards the other male, "Whose this?"

"Liam." Tripp quickly responds. "He's in my Administration & Management Class as well as my Economics and Government class."

I let out an impressed whistle, "That sounds like a lot of work. Well," I slide my hand forward, hooking it with Tripp's elbow. "Do you mind if I steal him from you? I have to talk to Tripp about something urgent."

Liam blinks, looking between us and taking a step back. "Oh! Sure, of course." He gave us a large grin and a small wave. "See you around!"

"He's cute."

"Yeah. He's really nice too, always offers to help me when I don't understand an assignment."

I don't overthink the information as I tug him along the hallways, looking for an empty lecture room. Once I find one I tug Tripp inside, locking the classroom door behind us.

"What's wrong?" I ask as I turn to face him. Tripp leans against one of the many desks scattered inside the room, looking like he hadn't slept in days. Instinctively, I reach out to him, wrapping my arms around him, pulling his curls back. He flinches at the touch, I frown, "Did I-"

"No!" Tripp leans into my touch. "You didn't do anything wrong, god - I. It's me. I did something terrible."

"I'm pretty sure I'm worse," I quip. "Remember that time I bragged about making a girl drool on my lap? That must've been terrible for you."

Tripp let's out a light laugh, I count it as a victory. "That was pretty terrible."

I grin, "There can't be anything you've done that's worse than that so- what is it?" I startle as Tripp let's out a noise similar to a sob. He curls into himself, placing his forehead against my shoulder as he tells me how terrible he is, because the night before we went on the road trip,

The night before —

_________

There's a constant ringing in my ear, muffling the voice that is addressing me. Then there is clearness and I zoom back into focus, looking at the lady sitting before me with a concerned expression etched in her face. "Mr. Hail, something seems to be botheri-"

I snort, "Call me Logan, Mr. Hail is my father and we aren't really on-" I meet her gaze, "Well, I'm sure you already know what terms we're on."

The lady, Alondra, she introduced when I first stepped into her cozy office, sends me a strained smile and barely-there nod. "Yes, I'm aware. Let's not talk about him though, what's on your mind?"

"If it's not related to my dad or Kai, then is it important?"

She hums, as if expecting that question, and places her hands on her knees, leaning forward. "My first priority, as a therapist, is to help my patients heal. Sometimes in order to do that I have to help the patient figure out and pull-apart their feelings or experiences. Sure, we are here now because of your father and because I want to help Kai in that process, but before I can get to that I have to make sure you are in the right state of mind. Right now, something is on your mind that is halting that progress, so let us face that first before moving on. How does that sound?"

"Sounds like you have everything figured out." I mutter disdainfully. Alondra remains quiet, sitting back on her seat. After a couple of seconds I sigh, "Sorry, yes, that sounds good."

"Good." She smiles and waits.

It seems that that's all therapy is, waiting. The silence overwhelms me and I find myself pushing off my comfortable spot on the couch across from her, choosing instead to pace in her office. "My friend, best friend. My best friend Tripp, I- I've liked him - as more than a friend - ever since high school. We decided to come to college together, and now- now we're working things out. We both like each other, and have agreed to see if we can make it work."

"And how does that make you feel?" She cuts through, legs folded.

At least let me get to the root cause of my issue, woman. "Happy and relieved. So relieved. Because I was so scared that if I told him how I felt that he wouldn't return my feelings, or that it would create this huge gap between us."

"You said you're working things out, can you elaborate on that?"

I run my hands through my hair, "We're being more open with each other, more comfortable. We're a lot more. . .physical than we were before. You know, kissing, couple-y stuff. But today," I sigh, regaining my focus. "Today he told me that he sexually assaulted me."

Alondra hums, I don't give her the chance to ask me any questions. "Apparently! The night prior to us moving into our dorm, we were still in our home-town because it's a 9 hour road trip, we hung out. Which isn't news- we had sleepovers every other night." She doesn't rush me, I know I'm going into a lot of details, too many details. I'm grateful, "I got drunk that night, again not a shock, home wasn't exactly the best place and I would drink a lot. I've stopped now, I don't need an escape now. But okay, I got drunk, apparently, and - apparently!- we made out. And. . .yeah."

"How did the topic come up?"

"He's been acting distant and he looked like hell, honestly, so I asked him what was bothering him and he told me - kind of broke down, but it came out."

"Can you elaborate a bit? How did you feel seeing him like that? And what did you think when he finally told you?" Her lips are tight, pressed together in a scowl, but the rest of her face was calm and collected.

Finally having let out the bundle of my issues, I sit back down on the couch. "It felt terrible seeing him like that. I wanted him to stop worrying and stop being sad. I hate seeing him sad, it does something to my heart. In a bad way. And when he told me, I - I don't know. I was relieved but also confused?"

"Why is that?"

"I mean," I start. "Relieved that he told me, obviously. But confused because of how he portrayed it. I was the only one drunk, he doesn't really like alcohol, never has. So I'm the only one that drinks between us. And - it's so dumb. I mean, sexual assault is sexaul activity that one does not give consent to - right?" She gives me a brief nod. "I know for a fact that any sexual activity I do -did with Tripp was fully consented to."

"Do you remember anything from that night?"

"I remember," I pause, scrunching my nose and thinking. "I remember small bits. Not all of it, not to the extent he described. But enough to know that I welcomed it, I thought it was another one of my wistful dreams until today, that it wasn't real and that it would never be real."

"And what are your thoughts on Tripp's perspective on the event?"

"That he's stupid." Once more, I don't let her interrupt. "I don't hate him, or feel uncomfortable! He's stupid, I consented- I consent." I huff with an indignant stomp to her warm brown floor.

She smiles as though she had just finished a puzzle, "Do you know what you're going to do now that he's told you everything?"

It takes me a second to interpret her question but when I do I copy her smile, "Yeah, I do."