《Once (KaiSoo)》entry #9

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Entry #9

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I will say nothing else but the truth. The reason why..... I left.

You already knew that I got Krystal pregnant, and if I don't marry her, her father will kill me. But there's still things you didn't knew.

Krystal is dying, she's begging me to stay that time I wanted to break up with her. She has AIDS and she wanted me to stay. That time was when I knew she has AIDS and she was pregnant. I got shocked, actually.

I mean, how can she and our baby survive if she has AIDS? That was the time when I knew that she needs me more than Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo is just pregnant that time, he's healthy and I know he can take care of himself well.

But Krystal.... she needed me more than Kyungsoo.

And so I chose her over Kyungsoo.

That time, I was still in love with Kyungsoo. But I needed to leave him because of Krystal and our new baby. Now, tell me.

Jagiya, did I do the right thing? Well, let's get straight to the point.

When Kyungsoo and I just got married, I'm still in love with him.

But then Krystal came into the picture and slowly ruined it all away.

At first, I don't care about her because I still love Kyungsoo.

But when I got her pregnant and when we got married, my love for Kyungsoo faded and my love for Krystal rose. Krystal made me realized that I wanted a woman, not a man, to spend my whole life with.

Just like what I've said, I fell out of love with Kyungsoo and I fell in love with Krystal. I married her not because of our baby, but because I already love her. I really really love her.

Jongin

Jagi, Is loving Krystal a bad thing I've done?

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