I bumped my head to the beat of my song, 'Tabloid Junkie' as Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis messed with knobs and dials on the soundboard. This song was going to be on my new album, 'History: Past, Present, and Future,' and it finally was mixed to my liking. I wanted this song to have a specific and distinct type of sound and it was finally where I had imagined it in my head.

As the song went off, I clapped in appreciation of their hardwork and dedication. "It's perfect!" I said excitedly, causing Terry and Jimmy to cheer for themselves. "Finally!" Jimmy said dramatically playing around. I smiled at them, "Thank you, it was great working with the both of you," I said meaning every word.

"You're welcome, Mike. We're family. We'll help you anytime you want," Terry said. "Yeah man. We're just glad you wanted us to help make history," Jimmy commented, making me smile at his history reference. Jimmy and Terry left soon after and I was on my way back to the hotel.

By the time I got myself situated for the night and ate dinner, it was past two in the morning so I decided to just crawl in bed to watch a movie. I found 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' and smiled to myself. This is one of Smiles' favorite movies. She can watch this movie all day long. I think she could even recite the movie off the top of her head if she had too. It's actually funny, because when we watch this movie, I'm focused on her because she's singing along and reciting the character lines.

She's a kid at heart and one of the reasons I fell so hard for her. She's one of the only people who understands me and I'm so grateful for that. I strongly believe that everyone needs that one person in their life and I spent so many years looking for that person. I thought it was Noelle, but it wasn't. My person is her. She is truly my soulmate, my other half.

I wish she was here with me now. She's in Paris helping Karl Lagerfeld with a fashion catalogue. She's been so busy lately, it's insane. Since coming back from Cabo, we've barely had enough time to see each other. And I hate it because these next few months, I'm going to have long days and nights in the studio before the release of my album, so every moment we have with each other now, I try to preserve it.

But, I don't know, it could be me just overthinking things, but she's been acting a little weird lately. Almost like she's hiding something from me. I try to ask her about it, but she always says it's nothing and that she's just stressed out, so I do try to give her the benefit of the doubt because she does work a lot. But, I'm still weary. If something is wrong, I'd want her to come to me. Not hide whatever it is.

I sighed, turning to look at the phone beside the bed. I sat up wondering if I should call her. I hadn't talked to her since the morning and I needed to hear her voice. I bit my lip wondering if I should or shouldn't. I looked at the clock and realized that it was 8 AM in Paris and that she'd be up.

I grabbed the phone and dialed her number. The phone rang for a while and on the last ring she picked up. "Hello?" she said softly, making me smile. "Hi, is this the future Mrs. Jackson?" I asked, smiling to myself. I heard her smile, "Hmm..no. I think you have the wrong person sir," she answered. I smacked my lips, "Oh that's her alright," I said rolling my eyes playfully.

I heard her chuckle lightly, "Hi baby," she said through her laughter. "Hi," I said laughing with her. "Whatcha' doing?" she asked. "Laying in bed watching The Nightmare Before Christmas," I answered and I heard her gasp dramatically. "You watched it without me!?"

I laughed, "Well you're not here," I started but she cut me off, "I'm always with you," she said, making my heart melt. I smiled playing with the phone cord, "You're smooth," I teased and she laughed. "They don't call me a smooth criminal for nothing," she joked.

"Okay, now you're corny," I said and she scoffed, "Says the one who called asking for the future Mrs. Jackson," she said. "Hey! That's not corny! That was romantic," I said back with a scoff, "It's not like you're not going to be the future Mrs. Jackson." I heard her smile, "I'm kidding, Joker. I can't wait to be the future Mrs. Jackson," she said softly.

"What are you doing?" I asked and she let out a breath. "Well, I've been up since 6 for hair and makeup, but right now, I'm about to eat breakfast and then head to the studio. I'm shooting today with Karl." I nodded, "Mmm. Sounds exciting," I said moving positions in the bed. "Yeah, how was your day?" she asked, "Good. productive. I finished another song," I answered and I heard her cheer.

"Yay! That's so exciting! I'm so happy for you! I can't wait to hear it," she said supportively. "You can hear it right now if you would come to the studio with me," I said sarcastically. I've been trying to get her to come to the studio with me, but she kept saying no, because she's a fan and she should wait like all of my other fans. "I told you! I need to be surprised like the rest of the world," she said, trying to defend herself. "Yeah, yeah," I said and she chuckled.

We talked on the phone some more about our days and what lied in the days ahead of us. "When do you come home?" I asked. "I have two more days in Paris and then I fly to London for another four days," she said and I pouted. "I miss you," I said sadly. "I know. I miss you too," she said sympathetically, "But I'll be home before you know it."

I let out a breath, "When you come home, I'm locking you up and keeping you to myself," I said half-serious, half-jokingly. She laughed a bit, "Sounds perfect to me. We can go to Neverland and just be recluses together," she commented. "You think I'm joking, but I'm not," I said and she laughed again.

"Oh I know you aren't." I yawned over the phone, feeling a wave of sleep rush over me. "Tired?" she asked. "Yeah," I said, yawning again. "Michael!!" she exclaimed. "What?" I asked confused. "It's almost four in the morning in New York! You need to go to bed!" she said sternly. "I needed to hear your voice. I need you," I said matter of factly. I heard her smile, "Now who's the smooth one?" she teased.

I chuckled lightly hearing voices in the background. "Okay, thank you Devon," Ashley said and I frowned up. "Sorry about that, but go to sleep," she said back to me. "Who's Devon?" I asked. "Oh, my new security detail," she answered. "New? Why did you get more security?" I asked and it went silent.

"Wes hired him. Thought I just needed another detail for traveling," she said nonchalantly. I hummed, "Hm. Alright." I said knowing that wasn't the reason. "Smiles?" I asked. "Yeah?" she answered. "You'd tell me if something was wrong right?" I asked and it went quiet for a few seconds.

"Yeah-yeah, I would," she said, not sounding too convincing. "You sure?" I asked and she exhaled, "Nothing's wrong, Michael. Nothing I can't handle," she said and that made me raise questions. So there was something and she was going to tell me sooner or later.

"Um, I gotta go. I need to head to the studio, but try and get some sleep," she said sweetly, changing to conversation. "That's impossible without you, but I'll try," I said, letting out a sigh. "Call me when you wake up, yeah?" she asked. "Yeah," I said smiling. "Okay, good. I love you," she said, making me smile even more. "I love you more. Have fun on set," I said and she thanked me. "Goodnight Joker," she added. "Bye Smiles."

I hung up the phone and watched the ending of The Nightmare Before Christmas before I drifted off to sleep.

I had been on set since 11 AM and I was currently in my dressing room getting touch ups done to my hair and makeup for the next look.

I heard the dressing room door open and close to see Alisha. She looked at me through the mirror with a blank expression. "What's up?" I asked slightly frowning and she sighed. "So, I wasn't aware of this till now, but apparently for the rest of the shoots taken today, it's duo shots. You're going to have a male model that is sort of like a "love interest," she said in quotes.

I opened my mouth to speak, but she spoke up again, "I really had no clue. I'm sorry." I smiled at her, "It's okay, don't beat yourself up over this. I'm not mad and it's not like this hasn't happened before," I said reassuring her. She smiled and blew out a breath she was holding in.

"Who's the male model?" I asked and she shrugged, "They didn't tell me, but he just arrived on set, so we'll see when we go out there." I nodded and turned back to Kevyn who was touching up my makeup.

About half an hour later, I was all ready and dressed in my first look of the duo shots. Me and my entourage walked out to set with Marina combing through my hair and Kevyn touching up my lipstick. "Okay, so you have 3 outfit changes for the duo shots," Alisha said and I nodded, sipping my water.

"The whole idea is that the two of you are a couple, so it's going to require you to get close," Alisha added and I gave her a look. "Let's hope Michael doesn't kill me," I said jokingly and everyone around me laughed.

"Ashley! Darling!" I heard from behind me so I turned around and saw Karl approaching me with open arms. "Hi!" I hugged him tightly, "I haven't seen you in so long! How are you?" I asked. "Fabulous as always," he said and I laughed, "What about you, Missy. You've been everywhere! I am so proud of you! I always knew you had it in you," Karl said, grabbing my hands. I squeezed them gently, "Well thank you for believing in me and giving me that chance. I wouldn't be where I am without you," I said back sympathetically.

"Yes you would. You're beautiful darling!" Karl said, making me chuckle. "So, you heard you have a male model as well, correct?" he asked and I nodded. "Good. He should be out any minute. He's new to this, but very easy on the eyes. You and him should become friends," Karl said and I widened my eyes slightly. "Michael would go crazy," I said and Karl laughed.

"Oh, what he doesn't know won't hurt him," Karl said, waving me off. If only he knew. Michael had so much power it was ridiculous. Sometimes I felt he had more influence than Bill Clinton. Anything he wanted to know or find out, he got it. And now throw me somewhere in that? Oh definitely.

"How is the boyfriend?" Karl asked and I smiled thinking about Michael. "He's great! He's been in the studio wrapping up some things for his new forthcoming album," I answered. "Great. Can't wait to hear. Let's get you situated," Karl said, linking arms with me and walking me over to meet the photographer.

As I waited for my male counterpart to come out, I talked amongst my team. "Ashley!" Karl yelled and I turned my head to look at him walking up to me with someone following him closely behind. "I want you to meet the male model," Karl added and I nodded, standing up to greet whoever it was properly.

"Ashley, meet Aiden. Aiden, meet the insanely beautiful, Ashley," Karl said as Aiden stepped beside Karl.

"You got to be fucking kidding me," Alisha said underneath her breath as I stood there frozen in shock. "Smiles," Aiden said softly, smiling at me as he pulled me into a hug. I got as firm as a brick wall as he hugged me. He pulled back still smiling at me. "You two know each other?" Karl asked with his mouth open as he looked back and forth between us.

I stared at Aiden, unable to comprehend he was going to be my male love interest in this photoshoot. "Hellooo? Earth to Ashley," Karl said, waving his hand in front of my face knocking me out of my shock. "Huh?" I asked flustered looking at Karl, seeing him smile. "Sorry, I'm just surprised," I added, chuckling nervously.

"So you two do know each other?" Karl asked and I nodded, slowly. "Uh yeah, we um-we actually dated," Aiden said looking at me. I looked away and heard Karl gasp, "Dated? No way! When?" he asked.

"From high school till about 5 years ago," I said under my breath and Karl leaned closer, making me repeat myself. "High school? Oh my," Karl said for dramatic effect. "Yeah, but we had crushes on each other since the 5th grade," Aiden added and I tilted my head at him, poking my tongue in my cheek. "Well, now I know for sure there will be some chemistry!" Karl said excitedly and I gave him a tight lipped smile.

"We're gonna start shooting in 20 minutes," Karl said walking away, so I turned around to leave, but Aiden grabbed my arm. I looked at his hand on my arm and then up at him. "Sorry," he said nervously, taking his hand away from my arm. "I um-um," he stuttered, "I-I didn't think you'd be the woman model," he said looking at me and I nodded, slowly.

"Yeah, um when did you get into modeling?" I blurted out. He chuckled a little, "I didn't plan on it, but at a photoshoot for my soccer team, the photographer asked to shoot me for another shoot and I said yes. And now I'm here. With you," he said slowly looking up at me.

I looked Aiden in his eyes, feeling a wave of emotions rush over me. I vividly remember the day I caught him cheating and still to this day it hurts. I think it was the betrayal most of all. The one person you thought you couldn't do life without betrays you in front of your eyes. Yeah, that hurts.

I felt tears in my eyes as I stared at Aiden in front of me, reliving the emotions I felt that day. I quickly wiped my eyes and turned around, speed walking towards Alisha. "Ashley, wait!" I heard him yell from behind me but I kept walking. I made it towards Alisha and she turned towards me, "Can you believe this shit?" she asked but once she saw my face, she became concerned. "What happened? Are you okay? Did he say something to you? I swear to God, I've been wanting to kick his ass since he cheated on you," she said angrily, starting to walk towards him, but I stopped her.

"No," I said choking up, "I'm just-just. I don't know," I said shrugging and wiping my eyes again. Alisha gave me a sad look and hugged me. "Come on, let's go to the back," she said, grabbing me and walking towards my dressing room. We walked in and she closed the door behind us.

"What are you feeling right now?" she asked and I huffed. "I feel pain. Anger," I said, shaking my head. She placed her hand over mine for comfort. I looked up to the ceiling and shook my head. "And I feel sad. I don't know why, but I do. And I shouldn't feel like this. I'm over him and I'm with Michael," I said, turning to look at her as a tear fell down my cheek. "I shouldn't be feeling like this," I said, shaking my head.

"Hey, hey," Alisha said wiping my tears, "It's okay. He hurt you, so I understand why you feel the way you do. And I'm gonna be honest Ash, you never truly dealt with everything. You walked out on him during lunch and your way of getting over him was through suppression of your feelings and Michael was always there," Alisha finished.

"And you probably feel anger because he broke you and Michael up. He betrayed you not once, but twice. Your feelings are valid, but you're stronger than the feelings he brings along with him," Alisha added, making me feel better. I nodded at her and hugged her. "Thank you," I said, pulling back, "He's in my past."

"Exactly," she said, fixing my hair, "Now, how are we going to tell Michael because he will flip." I sighed heavily, "I don't know. That's a whole nother thing in itself. He's going to go ballistic."

"I think it's best if you tell him, but that's my opinion," Alisha said and I nodded, "No, no. I think you're right. I'll tell him before the catalogue comes out."

"Okay, let's get back out there so we can finish what we gotta do and get outta here," Alisha said standing up. "You can say that again."

Alisha and I walked back out to the set and Karl noticed me right away. "There you are! You ready?" he asked and I felt Aiden staring at me. "Yeah, let's get this over with," I said walking to the props.

Aiden slowly walked up towards me, "I'm sorry if me being here upsets you. I didn't exactly expect this either if that's any consolation," he said slowly. I nodded, "It's okay. I just got overwhelmed but I'm better," I said, giving him a small smile. He smiled back, "It is good to see you though. You look beautiful. I always knew you'd get more beautiful as we grew up," he said smiling a little.

"Thanks," I said shyly, looking down at my feet. "Okay, places everyone! Let's do this!" Karl said through the megaphone. Aiden and I got into the first position which was Aiden turned looking at me and I was in his arms, but looking towards the camera.

His hands gripped around me and it felt foreign. It didn't feel right. I didn't like it, but it was for work so I had too. "Aiden, lean into her more!" the photographer called out and Aiden looked at me for approval and I gave him a slight nod.

"Beautiful! This is great!" Karl said as we continuously posed. We finished the first two looks faster than I thought and it was going better than I thought. Aiden and I actually were getting along too. It made it easier and we even made small talk in between poses.

For our last look, Aiden had to pose sitting forward on the couch while I laid on my side with my head in his lap. During the posing, I felt his hand go to my hips and I stopped to look up at him. "I have a boyfriend," I said, pushing his hand off of me. "As you've mentioned all day," he said, smirking.

"Yeah, because it's you I'm worried about, not me," I said which was only half true. I knew I'd have to face the wrath of Michael when I told him about this and then especially when he saw the photos. Aiden looked down at me, locking eye contact when Karl yelled "And that's it! Thank you everyone! Let's give a hand to Ashley and Aiden!"

I quickly got up and Karl approached us. "That was amazing! So much chemistry! People are going to go crazy!" he said and I saw Aiden look at me out of my peripheral vision. I gave Karl a smile, thanking him as did Aiden. He turned to leave and so did I but Aiden grabbed my arm.

"Hey, um, what are you doing after this?" he asked and I titled my head at him. "As I just mentioned, I have a boyfriend. A serious boyfriend," I said, giving him a tight lipped smile. He licked his lips at me, "I know, but we could still hang out as friends," he said hopefully.

I folded my arms and squinted at him. "I promise to not try anything. Just a friendly dinner. And my lips are sealed if yours are," he said, giving me a small smile. I pursed my lips, thinking about it. "I don't think that would be a good idea," I said truthfully, "There's too much history."

Aiden nodded, "I understand," he said sadly. I looked down at my feet, nodding slowly. "Well, um, it was nice shooting with you and-and seeing you again, Smiles."