I could feel the nerves already rising in me as my mom dropped me off at school.

I lived about 10 minutes away from school and my mom would always walk beside me as I skateboarded, drop me off and then walk back home.

I sighed as she waved at me through the metal doors. Tears pricked in my eyes as I turned around and waved back at her.

You're 18. Pull yourself together.

"Be a good girl." She called out and I smiled at her, walking inside and into the school. The red brick building already giving off too much negativity.

Good girl. I have always been a good girl. And I am not about to be a bad one just because I didn't fit in with the rich white kids.

I walked over to my class. My hands were clammy but I didn't dare lose the grip on the strap of my bag to blow air into my hands.

The Italian air was crisp, cold and felt unforgiving in the autumn. I shivered and cursed at myself for not bringing my coat with me. My eyes were swollen as I was still sleepy. Vaseline slathered onto my dark lips and long lashes framing my honey-coloured eyes.

I was fair as compared to the other brown kids I met. But I was dark compared to the white kids. Of course, I was. I was brown after all.

Filth. That's all I was. According to them, that is.

According to them, my skin was the shade of sand and my eyes were like murky water. Cold murky water. My nose was small and pretty, such a shame I was brown.

That's what the rich kids said anyway.

I played with the strap on my bag as I walked into my class.

Biology. Fuck. Hated that fucking subject with a passion.

A misogynistic and racist piece of shit that we called Mr Kristan taught us the damned subject and made me want to vomit every time I saw him or heard him.

"May I come in sir?" I asked as he nodded, looking up and sliding a disgusted look over me before gesturing me in.

I walked to the back of the class as his eyes followed me. A few people entered behind me and I turned around as a boy passed me. Only to recognize it was my friend Jackson.

"Marnie! How are you doing?" He asked loudly as the rich white kids turned their heads towards us. I winced as they snickered at me.

"I'm good, how are you?" I asked quietly, sliding into my seat.

Jackson was a rich half brown kid along with us. Like I said rich. That's how he fitted in with the white kids. They neglected the fact that he was mixed race but cared about how he had so much money.

Don't get me wrong. I love Jackson to pieces, but sometimes he settled for less. All he wants is to fit in with the kids, at this dreaded place. No matter the price. The other kids didn't bully me severely but they sure as hell made me feel below them with those glances and murmured whispers.

"I'm doing amazing. I've heard a new kid will be joining us." He whispered, I got into my seat as I made space for him but he made no move to sit.

He would sit with those kids.

"Sounds good," I mumbled taking out my book after checking the clock on the wall to see that there was still 10 minutes left until the lecture started.

"I mean that the kid will be sitting next to you, dumbass. There are no other seats available." He said, his skin paler than mine. He was dressed in a pair of white jeans with a lavender cardigan. A white tank top underneath.

"God, no. Nobody is sitting next to me." I scoffed and he shrugged before kissing my cheek and making his way towards his group.

A girl walked in. Her brown skin is like the colour of molten copper. Her dark wavy hair was let down and pulled to the front. Her head was dipped down as she walked over to the empty seat. By me.

She was dressed in a black and red striped sweater. A pair of cuffed baggy jeans and black converse adorning her feet.

She didn't even look at me as she plopped down on the seat beside mine. I held my breath as her scent wafted up to my nostrils. Her eyes were glued to her phone as I let mine rake down her body.

Thighs. Thighs. Thighs.

Stop stop stop.

I didn't mean to speak about her thighs explicitly it's just... I love thighs.

"I'm-" I was about to thrust out my hand to introduce myself but the bell rang and I sighed through my nose.

She didn't even look up from her phone as she took out her biology textbook.

"Okay, class. We have a new student here today. Miss, would you like to introduce yourself?" Mr Kristan said as she finally looked up only then did I notice her dark dark eyes. Almost black. Nothing like my dark brown ones.

Golden. That's what she was.

"No, I would not." She said, her voice as sweet as honey. I almost sighed in content at the sweetness glazing in her voice.

"I didn't mean it as a question. Please introduce yourself." He said, his voice clipped and I looked back and forth between them.

"My name is Arthur Walker." She said, not bothering to stand up.

"A fact about you." Mr Kristan said and I looked back at her. My eyes focused on the side of her face.

"I sing." Her voice was flat and he nodded, his eyebrows raised as he dismissed her.

"Can you like- I don't know... Stop staring?" She asked, her voice full of annoyance as she turned towards me. The sunlight streaming through the windows hit her face as I couldn't bear to look at her. I look down at my ripped baggy jeans and played with a loose string.

"I wasn't staring. I was just- sorry." I whispered never once looking at her. So so ashamed. I was so ashamed. Caught staring at her. What must she think of me?

Yeah, like I give a shit.

"It's... Whatever." She mutters not taking her eyes off of me.

"I'm Marnie," I say softly, her perfect eyebrow arches as she looks me over.

"Nice." She says and my insides flare-up.

"Huh?" I ask dumbfounded and her eyes widened.

"Shit- that's your actual name? Oh sorry- Marnie? like the-" She says but I interrupt her before she can finish. Yes, she was pretty, but I had enough people criticising me lasting a lifetime.

"Yeah, like the movie." I rolled my eyes as she gaped at me but then shrugged before looking at Mr Kristan who was teaching us.

The lecture ended before I knew it along with others. Hours had passed and I was now making my way back home.

"Hey, brownie! You smell like curry!" One kid screamed and along with him, the other laughed. Tears pricked at my eyes as I turned around and saw Jackson sitting with them.

"Fucking assholes," I whispered under my breath before running away to my home.

The city was buzzing as cars passed me, some cursing at me as I buzzed past them, on my skateboard. Tears were falling down my face by the time I reached home. I took out my keys and unlocked the doors walking inside to see a note on the table by the entrance.

"Your extra classes have been cancelled today. Stay safe, love you." I smiled at the note wiping my tears and sighing as I took off my shoes and socks.

I walked inside the house and up the stairs to my room. We weren't poor but weren't filthy rich too, we just had enough money to survive but nothing above that to get ourselves anything new.

The only money I would get was from my grandparents, which I would save and sometimes buy myself a pretty dress or shoes.

I dropped my bag on the leather chair, my sweatshirt far too heavy on my body as I struggled to get on my feet and pull it off. I was just left in my pink bra as I lay down on the cold floor. My skin prickled at the sensation but I sighed at the internal hiss.

I took out my phone from my pocket and checked the time to see it was around 2. I closed my eyes as the sun streamed in through the window. My room was the attic so it used to get pretty hot in here but Papa had the whole place changed along with the ventilation system and widened the windows so that air would continuously be flowing in.

The large glass windows were open and lined with the sheer curtains, my covers were a olive green colour with light green polka dots, and mismatched pillow covers adorned the bed. The leather chair in the corner of the room had cracks on its surface by how much it had been worn out. The large walls were covered in posters and paintings.

The bell rang and I groaned getting up and off the wooden floor, I threw a cardigan around my shoulders as I walked down the stairs, my steps light and pattering and threw open the door to see my sister Valerie standing on the other side.

"Today was a mindfuck, thank you for asking. How was your day kiddo?" She asked, her curly hair pulled into a bun as she walked inside and towards my room.

She absolutely adored my room and had even paid me to exchange rooms with her. But I didn't of course. I had a large bookcase, maybe that's why she liked it so much. Or maybe because of the windows too. But I never knew why she came into my room so much. Maybe it was to hang out with me but I doubt it. I'm guessing it's just because of my room.

"Good," I muttered closing the door as she plopped down on my bed.

"Uh no, not with your socks." I scrunched my nose as she wiggled her legs and I took off her socks fighting off my gag and dropping it in the laundry hamper. I washed my hands and then walked out of the bathroom to see her taking out food from her bag.

"You don't look too good. What's wrong?" She asked and I shook my head sniffling as my eyes burned with tears again.

"No, tell me. You know you can tell me anything right? I won't snitch. Ever." She said, her voice serious. She was so much more beautiful than I.

Valerie had the perfect body, her face full and her large nose framed it beautifully. She had curly hair that fell just below her shoulders in perfect manner. She was taller than me. About 5'7 and every single time that I looked at her I wished I was her.

"Just school stuff." I muttered and she huffed.

"That rich kid bullied you?" She asked her face flaring up and I shook my head.

"I'll fucking kill him." She muttered and I shook my head again holding her upper arm.

"Don't. Please. He didn't do anything." I say, almost pleasing and her face flares up even more.

"Let's just- talk about something else." I smile and she rolls her eyes.

"Well okay, so there's a band playing tonight." She said munching on her fries as I did the same with mine.

I know that she hasn't dropped this subject and will bring it up later but I will deal with it when she does.

"Where?" I ask and she grins. She knew how much I loved listening to live bands playing.

"Downtown." She answers and I sigh. She gets up and off the bed approaching my bookshelf and taking out a book.

Downtown was a bad, bad place to be. Illegal shit always went down in the streets.

"I know, you're gonna say 'but Val, I'm a kid'." She mimicks me and I lean back on the bed to watch this show unfold.

"And I'll say 'first of all you're turning 19 in a few months.' And I'm 21, I can easily get you under the club. I know people." She says and then plops down on the bed passing the book to me.

"You can either come with me to the show, hear some good music, eat some fine ass food or you can stay home and read." She mutters holding the book out, a hopeful gleam in her eyes.

I sigh pushing the book towards her and she squeals in delight.

"That's my girl. So what are you wearing?" She asks and I sigh shrugging.

"Probably a sweater. You know how cold it gets right?" I do not spare even a glance at her horrified face while walking towards my closet.

"What? No no no no. Did I mention no? You're not wearing a fucking sweater. Wear that dress I got you. The black one." She suggests standing in front of me. Her curly hair escaping her bun and now vulumnoys.

"What? Yeah that piece of scrap you call a dress? It leaves nothing to the imagination. It's literally sheer." I gape at her pushing past and opening my closet door and rummaging through my clothes. I barely see her roll her eyes before she's diving into my closet to search something.

"You will look perfect." She sighs and I push away her words. She didn't understand, why would she. She was skinny, had the perfect hourglass body I was neither thick nor skinny. I was in the awkward middle. And I hated it. Because what was exactly my body type? Was I a thick girl? Or a skinny girl?

"Okay, what about this?" I ask holding up a lavender turtle neck and black baggy overalls. She scrunches her nose but after seeing my face fall she smiles again.

"Yeah, it looks good. But can I do your hair? And make up?" She asks and I nod smiling giddily.

"Did you ask Ma?" I say referring to our mother and she nods.

"Of course I did. She said that she told Papa we're staying at our Nonna's house. So all we have to do is sneak back in." Val grins and I grin back before plopping down on the bed and checking the time.

It was already 4 PM.

"Can I bring Sadie?" I asked and she nodded.

"Sure." She said after a moment of thinking.

"You're okay with it?" I ask and she gives me a bored look.

"Yeah, I like Sadie. As long as you're not bringing that Jackson guy with you I'm good." She answered and I laughed. She truly hated Jackson with a passion. Probably because she knew Jackson will never stand up for me.

"Okay, I'm just gonna go watch some Game of thrones before we leave. You wanna join me?" She asks and I shake my head, picking up the book.

"I'm good." I say before picking up the book she took out from my to be read pile just to see that it was 'Juliet takes a breath' by Gabby Rivera.

I sit at my window sill and began reading.

Hey! First chapter!

This is what Valerie looks like: