Everyone is on a mission right now, Tony and Steve told me I wasn't allowed to join just yet, not until they know I'm alright enough to go. So I'm with Bruce in the lab, going over things from Hydra. I explained to the best of my knowledge the machines I was put on, the electric shocks, all of it.

The memory suppressing machine, the torture, the trainings. I let Bruce use a machine to check my brain activity, run any possible test he could to see if anything is alarming.

"So, am I turning into some big green muscley dude or what?"

Bruce lets out what I guess is some weird and nerdy version of a chuckle and turns to me, scratching his head, "no no, no code green-ing for you Y/N. All I found is that you have radiation from the mind stone, meaning all the telekenetic powers, energy manipulation, and neuroelectric interfacing. You also still have your increased metabolism and improved thermal homeostasis."

"Neuron who now what the fuck?" I quip and Bruce just sighs with an apologetic smile, knowing that I don't speak scientist.

"You're fast and you're weird."

"Ah...yeah that makes more sense."

"Not to mention your increased strength, stamina, and what seems to be healing abilities...must be a thanks to whatever Hydra injected you with."

"Steve mentioned the super-soldier serum. Is it possible I have that on top of the mind stone powers?"

Bruce ponders, then looks through the data again with narrowed eyes focused on the information he is reading. When he skims, he raises his eyebrows while nodding, then focuses back again.

"I never thought it could be possible. Hell I didn't know the serum still existed...I tried to recreate it myself once using gamma radiation and well...we all know how that story goes."

My body vibrates while I release a chuckle, and look at the charts, then back at Bruce.

"But...it seems like you do have the serum in you. Not as powerful as the original back in 1941, but still altered your skillsets and powers greatly."

"Sounds a bit like I'm indestructible. Don't you think the others will be a little jealous?" I pout in mock tone at Bruce who just rolls his eyes, tapping me on the arm with a pen that zaps me. I jolt and grunt.

"Ow! Why?"

Shaking his head with laughter, he gathers up the papers and slides them into a file.

"Tony's gadgets are something else. Anyways, you're not indestructible, don't go around acting like it. Plus if you do and you get hurt we'd all have to be hearing from a very upset Wanda Maximoff."

My eyebrow raises at him but he just holds his hands up in surrender. I throw a gauze at him from the table near me and cross my arms over my chest while I lay back. He sighs, going silent for a moment before he speaks up again.

"They love you, you know."

What?

"What?"

Bruce turns around, sliding a pencil behind his ear, his hands clasped together innocently, then unclasping to speak with his hands.

"Wanda and Nat. They love you. And they know you're conflicted. I don't know, it's none of my business but I guess I have to ask...do you know?"

I go to ask what he means but I already have a feeling, he wants to know if I know who I want to be with. You know, I really wish this conversation wouldn't be a think I know Tony asked me not too long ago, two days ago actually. Then Steve asked after sparring. Him and Nat obviously talk. And I have been avoiding the both of them for the past week straight. Trying to clear my head, I guess. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I know I am going to either way.

"Right I uh...I don't know Bruce. I care for them both a lot but I don't know. I don't even know how to deal relationship crap. My entire life I have been trained to be a killing machine, to be a minion for Hydra, I have been locked in cells for years. Last relationship I had was before I was taken and even then...it wasn't long. I don't know. Shit, I don't know Bruce. Nat is beautiful and sexy and amazing. She's caring but dangerous. She makes me feel alive and strong and powerful. She understands what it's like to feel like a monster, she was raised as a killer too, she gets it. She gets me. She's also bold and not afraid to say what's on her mind, I really like that about her. Still, she has that soft side, the side where her eyes relax and sit at a more compassionate look, face releasing its stress and fears. She gets soft and...vulnerable with me.

But then there's Wanda. Lovely, beautiful, kind, strong, incredible Wanda. She...she makes me feel like there's a purpose in this world. When she looks at me, and I mean like actually looks at me...I feel naked, like she's seeing every single inch of me in and out, but she still adores what she sees. She doesn't run, she doesn't hide. She just continues to hold onto me. She's teaching me so much, but not just about my new powers...she's teaching me how to open up to someone, how to let someone help, how to feel things. She's like this piece of me I never thought I would find."

The room goes silent as I finish up my nice little monologue. I stare at my hands, playing with my fingers until Bruce clicks his tongue.

"Well then...seems like you got your answer then hmm?"

When I look up at him, I realize that he's right. I do have my answer. I know what I want, and I know that I have a big conversation coming up.

Well this should be interesting.

* * *

By the time everyone gets back, I sit in my room trying to prepare what I am going to say. I go through it over and over in my head. I swear it feels like I've been sitting in the same position on my bed for years.

I swing my legs over the side of my bed and take a deep breath.

"Alright Stark, time to make shit happen in your life."

My legs carry me outside of my room until I reach a door. My face feels like it is on fire by now. My palms are warm and damp, I try to slap the sweat off on my pants, and shake my body out to relax. With more even breathing, I close my eyes tightly to focus on one thought, not the millions of ones flying throughout my brain. I swear there's file cabinets in my head my little mini me's are going through but it all lit on fire and chaos is unleashed, like in Spongebob. I feel like fucking Spongebob.

My hand curls into a fist as I lift it.

"Come on. You can do this."

This is it.

I knock on the door three times and wait as my whole body begins to tremble with nerves.

This was a terrible idea. Horrible.

My body swivels and my feet start to walk away until a door opens behind me.

"Y/N?"

Shit.

Turning back around like a deer in headlights, I meet her beautiful gaze, head tilted in curiosity as she looks at me.

"Hey...can we talk?"

__

A/N:

Well whose door do we think we knocked on?