《Virtue and Vice》Chapter Eight
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A/N: Since there seems to be quite a few who are faithfully following this story, here's another chapter! Tell me what you think. Please vote and comment. :)
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“I think I can wash myself just fine,” I said patiently as Sebastian carried me to the bathroom the two days later. My fever had broken the night before and I had complained of feeling uncomfortable and sticky with sweat. “A quick shower will do—”
“Don’t be silly,” he interjected, swinging me over to the corner where the large, jetted tub was, gurgling with fresh, hot water and some light soap bubbles. “I’ve got a bath ready for you. You’ll feel better afterwards, I promise.”
I sighed as he set me down on a cushioned stool before reaching into the tub and testing the water temperature.
“I’m feeling a bit better but I still don’t have the energy to do much so I really can’t—”
“I’ll bathe you.”
I stopped and looked up to stare at him.
His expression was open and honest although I didn’t miss the fire that flickered in his eyes the moment we understood exactly what he meant.
“Don’t be absurd. You can’t bathe me.”
He crouched down in front of me to slip off the socks he insisted I wear because I was chilled earlier. “Why not? I’ve seen most of you, Cassandra. I can’t say I won’t react but I’ll behave like a perfect gentleman.”
I raised a brow. “Gentlemen don’t go around bathing young women.”
He grinned. “No, they do not, unfortunate bastards.”
I let out another long, exhausted sigh and glanced at the tub, tempted by the steam and the whiff of chamomile and honeysuckle in the air. “Okay. But no tricks. I mean, there’s a better time and place for that. Not like this. Not when I look this horr—”
“You’re beautiful to me, no matter what.” He peered at my face as he reached up to undo the messy braid I usually wore to bed. “Your hair is like my favorite brandy spilling down on your back—a deep, rich, sensual color, promising a decadent, heady flavor.”
I shivered as he ran his fingers through the soft, thick waves, catching a small handful of the ends which he brushed against his lips.
“Your skin is smooth and lightly kissed by sun,” he continued, reaching up to slowly part the collar of my robe, exposing my shoulders that the spaghetti straps of my cotton nightgown didn’t conceal. “And a sprinkle of freckles tell me just where the sun had kissed you, inviting me to follow the trail.”
I let the robe slip off of me and sucked in a steadying breath as his hands glided up my arms and along my neck to settle on each side of my face.
“Your eyes are large and a melting chocolate brown—expressive and kind,” he said as he gently traced his thumbs over my eyelids after they fluttered close. I opened them and stared at him and his entranced expression. “They’re eyes that pull you in, shatter your will and render you completely helpless.”
I smiled. “You must be immune if you still keep bossing me around.”
He grinned and moved his thumbs to fill the deep indentation on each of my cheeks. “Trust me, it’s a hard struggle. Especially when you smile at me and flash me these dimples. They make you seem sweeter and more playful than you already are. My breath clogs in my chest every time I see you smile. It’s not very good for me.”
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“No, it is not,” I laughed although my cheeks warmed.
“Ah, when you blush,” he exclaimed, spreading his fingers over the curves of my cheeks. “It makes me think of a dewy rose—innocent and delicate.”
I couldn’t help but snort which really just contradicted those last two adjectives.
I giggled but I quickly caught my lower lip to stop myself from bursting out laughing.
“And these lips,” he said huskily, his eyes glimmering with heat as he stared at my mouth. “They’re so full and juicy like ripe raspberries I want to bite and suck on them. Thrown in with your fresh, innocent beauty, they turn you into a temptress—a fallen angel bent on the seduction of a defenseless man like me. I don’t stand a chance, Cassandra.”
Despite my weakened state, I recognized the heat that pooled in my belly as lust. His searing glances and lazy touch answered for that but the fluttering of my heart was caused by something entirely different.
“You really think me beautiful?” I whispered in a slightly awed voice, watching his face, relishing the sincere surprise in his eyes at my statement as if he didn’t actually believe I thought otherwise.
“I know you’re beautiful,” he replied with a crooked smile, touching my chin before dropping his hands down to my waist. “When I first saw you sitting by the front room waiting for me in that yellow dress, staring at me as if you wanted to strip me down and have your way with me, I felt the kick right in my gut.”
“I did not stare at you that way!” I protested, slapping his shoulder lightly. “I thought you were the most seductive man I’ve ever seen but my thoughts weren’t carnal!”
He chuckled. “Well, that’s what you made me think anyway. Your hair was sitting on your shoulders, your brown eyes looking large and a little bit lost at first before they started flashing with fire after I provoked you. That startled me—you looked like a fresh, summer bloom but you weren’t afraid to show your thorns when you had to fight back.”
I smiled. “Tell me something. I want to hear the truth.”
“Yes?”
I reached up and lightly ran my fingers along the side of his face. “When you read Timothy’s note and you saw me, did you want to do it? Did you want to accept what he offered?”
Sebastian hesitated for a bit before he sighed and turned his face slightly to kiss my hand. “Yes. Images of you naked and writhing in my bed in various, creative positions flashed through my head like a slide show before I could do anything about it. There was something very sensual in your dark eyes when you gazed at me with such unguarded emotions. I instantly wondered how they would look dazed in ecstasy, or lazy and slumberous, or crinkling at the corners when you laugh. It was very powerful, that moment of instant attraction I felt for you, that for a second, I forgot the insanity of Timothy’s idea, and felt like snatching you up and throwing you on my bed.”
“A little primitive but I can’t say it’s not typical of you,” I said with a laugh although my cheeks were flaming. “Maybe it was just my virginity that hooked you in.”
He shrugged. “It wouldn’t have mattered to me. I wanted you regardless of that detail but yes, the fact that no one has had you in the way I wanted you made the desire a lot more fierce. When I realized I couldn’t have you without breaking the rules, I made sure to stay out of your way and avoid temptation. Apparently, I’m not very good at it.”
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I wrinkled my nose. “You seemed to be doing fairly well in staying away from me. That evening of the fourth of July party, you had your tongue down Aurora’s throat. I saw you in her balcony as I was coming up from the beach.”
He grimaced and shook his head. “I had a raging hard on and fiercest urge to have my way with you when were down the viewpoint earlier that day. I put you in that white dress as some sort of protection but it only undid me. Aurora was there, offering the relief I badly wanted.”
I glared at him. “And of course you took it.”
“Actually, I didn’t,” he said, his expression slightly sheepish. “I tried. But it was your face I saw when I closed my eyes to kiss her. I left her alone then. I couldn’t use her like that.”
“So you went away again to sulk,” I said wryly.
“Something like that. It was either to get away or stay and lose control with you.”
He smiled very much like a young boy confessing mischief that my heart swelled and tightened inside my chest. My hand reached up and slipped through his hair, tugging at the ends gently.
“August ten.”
He arched his brows in question. “Yeah? What about it?”
I smiled. “It’s my birthday. I will be eighteen.”
I waited and watched Sebastian’s face—the flicker of surprise, the twitch of his brows in deep thought and the glint in his bright green eyes—all told me that my news was a double-edged sword.
“I wanted to tell you before I got sick that I... I mean, I want to... You can, we can...”
My voice trailed off as my face doubtlessly turned crimson. My eyes dropped to my lap where my hands now fidgeted in embarrassment.
Drat.
How does one offer one’s virginity up to a man?
“Cassandra.” His voice was low and thick.
He swallowed hard. “We don’t have to. You don’t have to.”
“I don’t?” I echoed, staring at him puzzledly.
Then it was my turn to swallow hard. “So you don’t want me anymore. You don’t—”
“Sex isn’t all I care about,” he snapped irritably. “I’m not doing any of this in order to sleep with you. I’m doing this because you need me and because—”
“For charity. Right,” I spat out bitterly.
“Will you stop interrupting me?” he barked, furious now.
“You were interrupting me!” I shot back, pulling my robe back up in some lame effort to protect myself. “Forgive me if I had some delusion that you somehow desired me especially after you recited an entire ode about my hair and my face!”
“I do desire you!” he growled, grabbing my wrists to keep them from fidgeting with my robe. “I’ve made that abundantly clear. But this—whatever this is that we have—I’m not doing it so you can repay me with your body. It doesn’t matter if you’re seventeen or thirty. I’m not sitting around and biding my time until you’re legal so I can pounce on you like a rutting animal.”
I paused at my tirade and let his words sink in, his confession catching me off guard.
“So you’re planning on having a chaste relationship with me?” I asked, blinking in confusion.
He groaned and got up on his feet, pacing. “I can hardly call it that after all that we’ve already done. I don’t know. I haven’t really thought this through, which is very new for me. I just thought... I just thought this could be enough. Until the time is right.”
I bit my lip, observing the agitation vibrating through Sebastian. “On August ten, the time will be right.”
His eyes narrowed. “This doesn’t end with my acquisition of your maidenhead.”
I colored. “Only you can say it in such a cold, callous manner.”
He had the grace to wince. “No, dammit. What I’m trying to tell you is... Look, I...”
I watched as he pressed his lips together in annoyance before taking a deep, ragged breath.
He pushed a hand through his hair and turned to face me again, his eyes hidden in the shadows created by the light behind his head.
“August ten will just be the beginning,” he finally said in a low, quiet tone that sent a shot of electricity down my spine.
“I warned you before, Cassandra,” he continued, his voice breaking slightly. “There will be nothing you won’t give and I don’t think you’re ready for that.”
I had nothing I could say because he was right. I wasn’t ready for that.
I took a long, deep breath of my own, my eyes closing briefly. “All I know is that I don’t have very much but I have this one gift that solely belongs to me—something that is and has always been mine alone to bestow.”
“There are better men out there,” he said in a voice that was pure acid as if he loathed the fact.
“Of course there are,” I answered with a shrug.
His jaw clenched in anger, his eyes flashing. “Then there you go. Why don’t you start auditioning them until you find your goddamned Mr. Perfect to deflower you—”
“Is the crude language really necessary?” I interrupted with a grimace. “I don’t know why you’re upset. Of course, there are better men out there. More handsome, more wealthy, more decent, more generous, more kind-hearted, more romantic, more caring—”
“Cassandra!”
I stopped at his snarl, blinking and staring up at him as innocently as I could. “Why, do you not agree? There are definitely more men out there more deserving of my maidenhead—your own antiquated term—and who would certainly be less of an ass about it than you.”
A sound that somewhat resembled a growl came from Sebastian’s chest as he glared at me with the ferocity of a wild animal about to tear up its prey.
“If you push me any further,” he hissed, lifting eyes so green and sharp like a rough emerald I felt it slice through my newfound amused confidence in this little game I’d recklessly started. “I will not be responsible for my actions. I will take your bait and devour you.”
I sat still, wondering if I’d gone too far as I watched him clench and unclench his fists at his sides, his nostrils flaring and his mouth pursing in an effort to keep down what I suspected was another growl.
Sebastian could truly be an animal—there was no doubt about it.
And apparently, that was the only way he saw himself.
All my annoyance and frustration drained out of me.
With great effort, I pulled myself up on my feet, took two steps to reach him and slowly folded my arms around him, my cheek pressed against his chest.
“There are definitely better men out there,” I murmured against him. “But I don’t want a better man. I want you.”
I felt the tension leave him, his stance softening.
He tentatively put a hand against my back. “Cassandra, darling...”
I looked up to him and saw his green eyes now shimmering with a surge of emotions—this man of an impenetrable mask who showed so much whenever he took it off if only just for a moment.
“It is my gift to offer you but it’s your choice to accept it, Sebastian,” I told him with a small, tremulous smile. “In taking my gift, you will be giving me another—one I will accept from no other man, no matter how much better he is, but you.”
“Sweet hell,” he muttered as he exhaled loudly, looking more tortured than delighted at the prospect of being honored with my virginity that I wondered if such high-value commodity was simply overrated.
He leaned down and brushed a kiss on the tips of my nose before pressing another squarely against my lips.
“That’s what this is—sweet hell,” he murmured again, a slow smile curving on his mouth.
I smiled back and let him step away so he could push down my robe and let it slip on the tile floor.
“Now, let’s get you in that bath before the water’s gets cold,” he said as he slowly captured the thin straps of my nightgown and pulled it down over my shoulders.
We both sucked in a breath as the nightgown slipped down further. I knew Sebastian was battling with himself to look away but it was a fight he was clearly losing.
I flushed as his heated gaze leisurely grazed every inch of exposed skin, secretly aching for his touch and mourning the fact that he kept his hands stiffly to his sides.
Needing some distraction from his lustful observation, I crossed my arms over my chest and turned sideways slightly to wiggle the gown down to my ankles, revealing pale pink, cotton bikini panties with ladybug prints on them.
I inwardly groaned at the sight of the childish design, certain that this wasn’t going to help Sebastian see past our substantial age gap.
I risked a glance at him and saw the amused sparkle in his eyes as they focused on my underwear.
I sucked in a breath as subtly as I could, hoping it would keep my somewhat flat belly looking a little more toned but as he brushed his fingers across my navel, the breath came loose in my chest, revealing some roundness on my stomach that he smoothed over with his palm.
“Butterscotch cookies,” I muttered miserably.
“Hmm?” He glanced at me, smiling and arching a brow.
I exhaled loudly. “I’m addicted to them. They explain my non-existent washboard abs.”
He laughed, both hands now settling on each side of my waist. “I don’t know why you have such a poor perception of yourself, sweet, but if it gives you peace of mind, let me assure you that I like my women with curves and you’ve got them all in the right places.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yes, you like your women for sure. Dozens of them, in fact. And you wonder why I have a poor perception of myself.”
I secretly cursed my tongue for rolling off what just sounded like jealous mutterings that grated even my own ears.
Of course he’s had women.
He had more than a decade ahead of me in experience.
The man was sin and vice himself and I had no doubt that even the most virtuous of women would have a hard time keeping her legs crossed. The man could probably seduce a chastity belt into unlocking itself.
“I say, you’ve got my complete attention, sweet, which should be reason enough for you to stop criticizing yourself,” he said, brushing his lips against the outer rim of my ear.
I scoffed. “I think I can’t breathe. Your ego just pushed all the air out of the room due to its massive size.”
“Ouch,” he said with a low chuckle, his hands slipping down to trace the curve of my hips.
“You know, I always thought lace and silk were the only way to go in women’s lingerie,” he murmured.
I blushed and turned away from him. “They are usually uncomfortable and high maintenance, not to mention expensive. I like my panties.”
He grinned rakishly. “I like them too. More than I ever thought I would. “
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, stop it.”
“I’m not lying,” he insisted, tugging on the aforementioned undergarments. “They have a playful and artless charm to them. They’re very... endearing.”
“Yes, endearing was exactly what the multi-million-dollar lingerie industry was going for when they shimmied their way into the market,” I said with a groan.
Chuckling, he pulled me close and trailed a dozen of kisses along my face before stepping back.
My blush grew more heated as I felt his eyesf inspected me from head to toe.
“Sebastian, stop staring,” I pleaded, biting my lip, my arms barely covering my chest. If I let modesty fly completely out of the window, Sebastian would be on hot on his heels to escape from the room.
He looked up at me and smiled. “Why? You’re exquisite.”
I flashed him a pained smile. “Thank you. I’m too weak to argue with you so I’ll believe you for now.”
As if remembering my current state of health, he came to me and scooped me up in arms before carefully lowering me into the water. Once I was immersed under the bath bubbles, I slipped off my panties and draped it on the edge of the tub.
I sighed in bliss as the warm, sudsy water swirled around me and waited patiently as Sebastian tucked a rubber bath pillow under my neck.
“Thank you,” I murmured with eyes closed. “You were right. I do feel much better already.”
I felt him shuffle beside me before I felt his big, strong hands dip into the water to slowly rub and stroke along my shoulders and arms, cleaning and massaging me at the same time.
“I forget how vulnerable you are sometimes,” he said quietly. “Whether you’re smiling or spitting fire at me, all I could think of is how hard you’re hitting me at many different parts.”
I cracked an eye open to glance at him with an amused smile. “Trust you to start spewing out something romantic only to turn it into something brazen.”
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