If I could use one word to describe Squad 53 graduating, that would be it.

We were currently standing in our assigned rows, our hands behind our backs with our eyes staring forward at Voche.

He was going on and on about fighting the Others, about how we were the earth's last chance, and about what responsibilities came with graduating. He had been talking for awhile, his stern voice echoing through the still, quiet room for what seemed like ages. All the while, the squads in the room kept at attention, showing their superior full respect.

No one wanted to screw up their chance at graduating, especially not now. Reznik had made it quite clear that Squad 53 could be kept from graduating at any point until Voche concluded the ceremony. That meant being on our very best behavior until Voche stepped down from the stage.

Ringer had also threatened to kill us if we did anything stupid, so there was that.

"With graduating comes more responsibility and harder, longer days. Your lives are about to change- if they haven't enough already. In a matter of days, each one of you will go out into the field and fight for what's rightfully yours, what's been taken from you, " Voche bellowed. "The world is counting on you to do what they couldn't do - destroy the Others and bring back peace to our great planet."

I pursed my lips, starting to feel the pain from standing still for so long. I hoped Voche would hurry up already.

I took a quick peak over at Zombie, moving only my eyes to avoid getting scolded for breaking my stance.

He, like the rest of us in the room, was wearing one of the navy jumpsuits that had been entrusted to us. But unlike the majority of us, he was as still as a statue, seeming not to be fazed by the length of time we'd been standing. He was the picture of a perfect soldier, which I suppose is why he was chosen as our leader, opposed to Flintstone, who had been fidgeting ever since we had taken our position on the floor.

My eyes moved back to the front of the room, just as Voche finished his speech and sent us off.

In unison we responded, "Sir, yes, Sir!"

With a quick swivel of our boots, we followed Squad 49 and the two squads in front of them out the door. There, Reznik was waiting for us.

"Congratulations, Squad 53," she said. "I never saw you graduating for awhile there, but you seemed to pull through. Now it's time for the hard part," she continued, marching off down the corridor.

After all the time we'd been at Camp Haven, we knew not to question her anymore. If she walked, we followed.

"Thank god that's over," Flintstone grumbled. "I thought we'd be in there forever."

"We wouldn't have been there at all if you had continued to fidget like a drunk rabbit," Poundcake said.

"Now that we've graduated, I hope I don't have to work with you losers anymore," Ringer said, rolling her eyes.

I narrowed my eyes. Even after graduating she was still irritating as hell.

I opened my mouth to retort something back just as Zombie's fingers touched mine.

I looked over at him, knowing exactly what his gesture meant.

"It's ok," he mouthed.

I nodded slowly and dropped my head to the ground, afraid that if I looked up I'd either blush at Zombie or punch Ringer.

We continued following Reznik down the hall, heading wherever she was leading us.

Abrubtly, she stopped and turned around to face us. We were at a 'T', where the hallway ended ahead and separated both to the right and to the left.

She pointed to the right.

"Private Zombie, Voche has asked to speak with you. Please report to the main control room."

Zombie nodded, and with one last look back at me, he broke away from our group and walked off.

Without saying anything to the rest of us, she veered off to the left.

"For the rest of you, you'll be reporting to P&D," she said, once she had stopped in front of the door that led to the P&D floor.

I heard a small groan from Poundcake.

We'd all expected something a little different than this after graduating.

We nodded as Reznik dismissed us.

"How's it fair Zombie gets to talk to Voche while we sort damned bodies?" Flintstone said once she had left.

Ringer rolled her eyes and threw open the door.

Teacup followed her.

"It's not fair. But whatever Voche has to say to Zombie, it's probably something involving the squad. Maybe they're setting us out in the field sooner than we thought," Dumbo said.

I nodded. "He's squad leader. It makes sense."

we walked inside, deciding not to prolong the inevitable. But while working, instead of focusing on the bodies I was disposing of, I found myself wondering what Voche was talking to Zombie about.

What if we were actually going out into the field soon?

What if we were actually going to be putting our lives on the line?

I shook my head, clearing the worries away.

I had trained for this. I had graduated. This was just the next step. And like the steps before it, I was sure to succeed.

~*~

Later that day, while the other members of Squad 53 were fast asleep in their bunks, I sat thinking.

The blankets of my bed swirled around my ankles as I stared up at the ceiling.

So it was true.

Apparently Dumbo's predictions had been correct; Voche had talked to Zombie about leading his squad into the field.

We would be leaving tomorrow to take our chances with The Others. We'd already been given a briefing after Zombie had returned.

Teacup was excited. Dumbo, Oompa, and Poundcake were anxious, Flintstone was eager, and Ringer was indifferent. Zombie seemed stressed, but overall nonchalant about delivery the news. As for me, I was still deciding how I felt about it. True, I did feel stronger and more prepared for our now ruined world, but that still didn't mean I was pumped to go fight some aliens or anything.

I let out a sigh and shifted my body to look down at Zombie's bunk. His bed was perfectly made. He hadn't come back after dinner.

It was pretty late at night, and we had a big day tomorrow, so I set out to find him.

I couldn't sleep anyways.

I climbed down from my bunk and pulled my boots on over my bare, cold feet. I also grabbed my jacket and slid it on over my plain navy t-shirt.

With a last look at our room, I tiptoed out into the hall in search of where he could be.

If Reznik found me out of the room at this time, I would probably be un-graduated (if that was even a thing), and I'd have P&D for every moment of every day.

But Zombie was always the most punctual person in our group. He was often the one telling the rest of us to get into bed and settle down. And the officers had no need to call on any of us during the night, so Zombie was most certainly out on his own accord...or something was wrong.

I rounded a corner and came upon the training room, peeking inside before continuing on my way.

I furrowed my brow and peeked in a couple more rooms. I was seriously regretting my stupid attempt to find Zombie right about now. Here I was, aimlessly wondering around like a lost puppy. Maybe Zombie was completely fine and he was just....I don't know.

I looked over my shoulder, completely paranoid that an officer would find me. I was breaking so many rules right now.

I was about to give up when I saw the blur of a navy t-shirt similar to mine. My feet moved back a couple paces and a smile broke onto my lips.

Thank god.

"Zombie" I whisper-shouted.

He was in one of the many arsenals Wright Patterson had. He was seated with his back to me near a huge floor length window, which spread from one side of the room clear to the other.

Zombie looked over at me, surprise striking his face.

"You shouldn't be here," he said back.

I quickly closed the door and sat down next to him.

"You shouldn't be here either. Do you know how much trouble you could get into?" I said.

Ben gave me a small smirk. "I don't think it'd matter very much."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We're going out into the field tomorrow, there's not much they could do to me before that."

I just nodded, letting my response be the silence that followed.

I stared out the window, my eyes drifting from treetop to treetop. They ran for miles, covering almost every inch of the window. It certainly looked beautiful, but I knew better. Our world wasn't beautiful anymore.

"I'm leaving Nugget behind," Zombie said smoothly. His eyes were directed away from mine, looking at the landscape instead.

"Good decision. I don't want him out there."

I knew from my time in the forest, before I had stumbled across Wright Patterson, that The Others had special...abilities that made them seem almost impossible to outrun or fight.

I'm normally not such a pessimistic person, but I was pretty positive Nugget wouldn't last long in a normal fight, let alone one with aliens.

Zombie turned to look at me. "I don't want any of us out there- especially you," he said, "But Nugget wouldn't last a minute. He'd break down before the Others even got to him...there's no way I'm letting him go."

I nodded, agreeing until I back tracked on his words.

"Wait, what do you mean 'especially you'?" I asked.

Zombie ran his hand through his hair. "It's dangerous and-"

Despite the calmness and concern etched in his voice, I felt my eyes narrowing.

"I've trained like the rest of you," I said. "Maybe not for as long as you have, but I have trained-"

"I'm not doubting your abilities," he interrupted. "It's dangerous...and I worry about you."

When I didn't say anything, he continued, "I worry about you, ok?"

I was taken back by his answer and slightly embarrassed by my outburst.

"You don't need to worry about me," I said slowly, diverting my eyes away from his.

"I can't help it- ever since I saw you at school...I just..." he paused, "I just want you to be alright..."

I searched for words to say, but my throat had dried and my heart was beating to wildly for me to focus on anything.

"I'll be ok-"

"You don't know that," he said.

I pursed my lips. "I'm going to be ok. We're all going to be ok," I said defiantly.

"We're not all going to make it," he said, "The Others-"

"I know what the Others are like," I cut in, annoyed by his negativity. "I don't need to hear anymore about how dangerous they are or or how we're not all going to make it out alive. I already know that. I already know that we're walking into a battle we may or may not win. I know the risks. Can't we just try to ignore all that and pretend everything is going to be alright?"

My words came out a jumbled rush as I tried to fit every bit of emotion I was feeling into them. He needed to stop. He needed to just pretend for me.

After all the training I'd gone through, I was strong. But still not strong enough. And as much as I wanted to believe that we were ready to go fight the Others, I couldn't push the feeling of dread away.

"You know that's not possible," Zombie said, a slight edge to his voice. "Pretending will get us killed."

I narrowed my eyes at him, pushing the feelings I had for him aside for the moment. "Pretending will give us hope," I said through gritted teeth.

Zombie looked over at me, his hair flopping into his eyes. "Listen, I'm just trying to be realistic," he said.

I crossed my arms and let my gaze harden. "No, I don't want to listen," I said. "I'm done listening to people. I'm done being realistic," I said. "We're going to be ok because I said so. We're going to be ok because I at least have faith in our squad."

Zombie shook his head. "Fine," he said, standing up to lean against the wall. He put his arm up to the wall and angled his body toward the window, avoiding my eyes.

After Zombie didn't say anything else, I brushed myself off and stood up.

"Goodnight then," I said, still incredibly annoyed by his arrogant attitude. "See you tomorrow, assuming you don't get in trouble. Which I honestly wouldn't mind if you did, because it's not like you actually care about the rest of us, huh?"

I made a bold step towards the door just as Zombie reached out his hand and grabbed my wrist, yanking me towards him.

"Don't ever say I don't care about you," he said.

His eyes bore into mine as he stared down at me. He was so close I could feel his warm breath on my skin and hear his heart beating against his chest.

The hostility escaped me for a brief moment as I stood rooted to the spot, with both feet planted firmly on the ground, completely caught off guard.

He loosened his grip but still had a firm hold on my wrist as he said, "I care about the squad; I care about you. I can't pretend...and I'm sorry about that. But I do care about you," he said, his eyes searching mine.

My breath caught in my throat and the hand he was hold started trembling. "Ok," I said eventually, dropping my eyes from his.

I carefully pulled my wrist out of his hold and turned away, toward the door, almost wishing I could run to it and escape.

I wanted to escape before he realized that my heart was pounding so much, at any moment it would burst from my chest.

Yeah, maybe he did care about me. But I was pretty sure he didn't care about me the way I cared about him. So there was no point in getting my hopes up just to have them fall down again.

"Lucy," Zombie said calmly.

I diverted my eyes to the ground. "See you tomorrow, Zombie."

I didn't wait for him to respond before I turned around and headed out the door.

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Sorry for the long wait; I moved into college about a week and a half ago so life has been crazy! Let me know what you think about this chapter in the comments!

And as always, vote if you love Ben Parish!