Chapter 75

Harry's POV

I've been in my room for about half an hour, and Louis's been in his room too. He won't talk to me...

That's what hurts most I think...

he won't speak to me..also he practically told me he wanted me dead and hated me...why would I ever think he'd love me? I'm so naive and stupid, why do I believe people when they say they love me? I've been hurt so many times I can't trust people anymore...but I guess I thought Louis would be different...

I was snapped out of my thoughts by someone pounding on my door. It was Louis, of course.

"Harry, open up."

I don't like his tone of voice....he sounds so cold and angry...

"w-why?"

"Because. I need to get my stuff"

He grumbled, banging on the door again and sighing.

"w-wait...what do you mean 'get your stuff' are...are you leaving?"

There was a long pause, the silence was sickening. I already know his answer...he's leaving me...ha, it's funny because he promised he'd never leave...no matter what...

"yeah...I need some time to think, I need to be alone.."

He finally said.

I laid against the end of my bed sobbing, I had to remind myself to breath I was crying so hard. Louis is leaving..? Of course he is...he doesn't need me...who does?

"Harry, open the door. I want to get my stuff."

"I-I..."

"Quit crying..just let me get my things and I'll go..I'll leave you alone, ok?"

I don't want to be left alone...I want him. I want to be with him forever...there's nothing else I could ever want and now I have nothing..

"Harry! stop it. Let me in. crying isn't going to make me feel sorry for you. That's all you want from me any way, right? You just want sympathy and someone who will deal with all your problems. But when it's the other way around you don't care! You except me to do everything for you!"

He shook the doorknob and kicked the door

"Fine! Be like that! See if I care"

"I-I'm coming..."

"good."

I put my blade in my pocket and went into my bathroom and quickly washed my hands. I didn't bother putting a shirt on, he knows I do this, and right now he's made it crystal clear that he doesn't care about me one bit. He wouldn't care if I died.

I stood in front of the door, debating whether or not to open it, finally, I gave in. I didn't want to make things worse...I'll just let him leave...

I opened the door and he pushed past me, he stomped over to the closet and yanked out a few of his shirts.

"turn the lights on. I can't see"

"umm...I-I don't know if-"

"I SAID TURN THEM ON DAMN IT!"

I nodded and bit down on my lip. I could feel my eyes getting watery again, but I wasn't going to cry in front of him. No. Not this time..he doesn't care...

I walked over and switched on the lights. Louis grumbled something and kept digging in the closet with his back turned to me. I went and sat on the bed and watched him.

He finished putting his clothes in his suitcase and then picked up his shoes. He hasn't glanced at me once, and kept mumbling to himself.

He snatched his suitcase up and turned to leave. He glared at me at first, but then his face softened.

I thought he was going to cry but he didn't...

He set his bag down and walked closer to me. He sat down and stared at my arms.

"You promised...you said you'd stop..."

"And you promised you'd never leave...you said you loved me...was I wrong?"

Louis shook his head and tears began filling his eyes.

"no, Harry...I-"

"It's fine. Go ahead...no one cares about me anyways..."

"I do.."

"No you don't...you want me dead"

"NO I DONT! Harry I don't, believe me! Please. I'd never want you dead...I was mad..I shouldn't have EVER said that...I'm so sorry...I love you so much I'd never want you gone..."

"y-you practically said you wanted me dead..."

"Hazz..no..."

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry...you're right, I mess everything up. I should've died Lou! I shouldn't be here.."

"Harry, no. shhh love don't cry, I'm sorry. Don't cry...d-don't cry.."

Louis wrapped his arms around me and whispered "I'm sorry"

I let him hug me while I cried, he rubbed my back and kissed my forehead.

He pulled away and took my hands and pressed them to his lips.

"Harry, don't ever go...don't die...I-I don't know what I'd do if I woke up one day and you were gone...I couldn't go on, Harry, it would drive me insane. Do you know how much I'd hate myself if you died? It would be my fault, I'd feel I wasn't there for you when you needed me...I love you, don't go.."

"And what if I did..?"

"Then...then I'd go too."

"no Lou...you have your life ahead of you...you don't want to die..you have so much to live for..."

"No I wouldn't, Harry...you are my life. you're everything I want. You're all I need"

"And you won't leave?"

"Never"

"Promise?"

"I promise. I won't leave, ever. I love you"

"I love you too"