《eunoia || poems》|forty eight|
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"calories"
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i sit on the bathroom floor with my hands covering my face.
a couple hundred calories wasn't that much to swallow. a couple hundred quickly turned into thousands. i don't remember the point at which i gave up control. all i can recall is an empty feeling created by this body that i'm forced to live in.
i eat with a broken hope that i'll end up forgetting my pain.
it's a temporary relief. i know that
I'll regret it each time i give into it again. but it's in those moments that i finally feel free. it's in those moments that i'm able to forget every lonely feeling buried deep within me.
food became my only friend and my only escape. nobody understands the darkness this type of comfort brings.
134 words
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