"Hey Mom," I answered the phone closing the front door behind me.

"Oh, so you do know you have a mother after all I haven't heard from you in weeks," my mom replied dramatically.

I rolled my eyes. "Mom, it's barely been a week since I last spoke to you quit being dramatic."

I made my way through the house heading towards my bedroom. Mia should be home soon, she texted me a while ago saying that she was dropping Nate off at the stadium before she came home to get ready for the football game.

Brooks finally talked me into coming to one of his games. The thing is I know nothing about football, I'm just glad Mia had already planned to go otherwise I would've been completely lost. Mia's the opposite, she loves football that's one of the things she and her dad would bond over when she was younger.

"Well, it felt like weeks and I missed you."

"I missed you too Mom, how's the new book coming along." I entered my room dropping off my bag onto the leather foot stool the foot of my bed before I made my way into my small walk-in closet

"Great, I finally got over that writer's block, Thank God." My mother is a best-selling thriller and fantasy author. She was currently working on the last book of her widely popular fantasy series but lately, she has been suffering from writer's block.

"That's great mom, I can't wait to read it when you're done," propping my phone near my ear with my shoulder I grabbed a pair of jeans off the shelf.

"Where's dad?" I asked her grabbing a leather jacket and a royal blue crop top.

"He's in his office finishing up a business call, he should be done soon. We're going out to the opening of this new restaurant later, I'm planning to wear that lavender dress you made me for my birthday." I could hear shuffling around some things in the background of her call.

"So what about you? What do you have planned tonight?" I don't know why she even bothered to ask me the same question every time she calls because usually, my answer is always the same read, watch tv, nothing special. Except for tonight.

"Mia and I are going to a football game," I said as I headed back toward my room laying my outfit out on my multicolored duvet.

"You?" My mother laughed in disbelief. "At a football game, you don't even like football." It's not that I don't like football I just don't know enough about it to say whether I like it or not.

"My friend asked me to come to one of his football games so Mia and I are planning on going," I realized my mistake as soon as the words left my mouth. Stunned silence greeted me on the other end of the line.

"You have a friend who isn't Mia and it's interesting, so when were you planning on telling me about your boyfriend," she responded tentatively.

"He's not my boyfriend just my friend and I didn't tell you because I know you'll make a big deal about it," I retorted.

I heard the front door slam closed indicating that Mia was finally home.

"Hey mom, Mia's here I have to go, bye, love you," I said in a rush hanging up the phone before she could say another word.

"Hey, Mia you better hurry your ass up you know you take forever to get ready," I shouted dropping my phone on the bed before I made my way back to the closet and grabbed a pair of boots from my shoe rack.

Returning to my room, I stop short at the sight of Mia sitting on my bed with her head in her hands.

Her head snapped up at my presence. When our eyes connected a tear trickled down the crest of her cheek. The boots fell from my hands with a thud as I rush to her side. Sitting beside her I wrapped my arms around her.

"Hey what's wrong," I asked her softly.

"Nate broke things off with me," she sniffled as another tear fell from her eyes she lifted her hand wiping it away quickly.

"Why? What happened?" I asked confused. Earlier they sounded just fine when I talked to her on the phone. She was on her way to drop him off at the stadium for his game tonight. What happened between then and now. If he hurt her I'll fucking kill him.

"He wanted more than I could give him," she paused to draw in a deep breath."He asked me to come home to Boston with him tomorrow for his parent's anniversary party and I told him I can't that's not something we do. He got upset, said he wanted a relationship with me and I wasn't willing to give him that so he couldn't do whatever we were doing anymore that he was done."

She pulled out my hold and straightened her shoulders wiping the remaining wetness from her face. "It's better this way we obviously want different things." I don't know who she was trying to convince me or herself. The fact that she was crying says otherwise.

"You know that's not true, if it was you wouldn't be so hurt he obviously means more than you're willing to admit," I grasped her hand in mine giving it a gentle squeeze.

"You know you're not your mom right and not every guy will turn out to be like your dad," I said gently.

Mia's reluctance towards relationships was heavily impacted by her parents' fucked up marriage.

Mia's dad was a serial cheater and her mom knew about his countless affairs but always forgive him. Until he left her for a twenty-four-year-old paralegal at his law firm. Mia's mother Amani took him leaving and the divorce really hard it took her years to recover. Mia's worst nightmare is becoming just like her mother. Loving a man so much that even when he treats her like shit she can't seem to let go.

So instead she doesn't let anyone get close to her for fear of getting hurt. And the one time she let her guard down the guy turned out to be a piece of shit so now she's more closed off than ever.

I smiled softly at her. "I see the way he looks at you and the way you look at him, you like him a lot even though you don't want to admit it. So don't throw away whatever you and Nate have because you're scared, don't let things that happened in the past stop you from moving on."

She didn't respond right away the silence stretching between us for a few moments before she shook her head slowly a humorless laugh falling from her lips. "That's rich coming from you."

My body tensed at her words. "What?" I asked her hoping I heard her wrong because she knew better than to go there.

She scoffed standing to her feet. "I find it funny that you're giving me advice about letting go of the past when you can't seem to do the same. When are you going to stop blaming yourself for what happened that night?"

I sat there in shock I couldn't believe she actually when there but my shock quickly shifted to anger.

"That's a low fucking blow, Mia all I was trying to do was help you. Don't take your anger out on me when the person you're really angry with is yourself."

"I didn't ask for your help," she shouted. "And you're not going to answer me, Gen? Huh? When are you going to stop blaming yourself for Eli's death?"

It felt like the wind was knocked out of me at the mention of his name, it always does. I felt a lump the size of a baseball form in my throat. She's right I do blame myself for what happened that night. It was my fault we were out on the road that night.

"Don't you dare bring him into this?" I warned her also getting to my feet.

She cocked her brow at me. "You can't even say his name, can you? It's been years and you rarely ever talk about him and you freeze up every time someone else mentions him."

"You don't know what you're talking about," I said my hands fisted at my side as I fought back the urge to slap her.

Fuck, I need to calm down because this is escalating quickly.

"Oh, I don't know what I'm talking about? You forgot I was there Gen. I was there when you refused to leave your room. When you would lay on your bed crying for hours. You refused to talk about him, you packed up pictures, gifts anything that reminded you of him."

I could feel that anger coursing through me. "You don't get to do that. You don't get to judge me for how I choose to grieve I did what I had to do to get out of bed every morning to move on with my life."

"Moved on really, that's bullshit and you know it Gen you haven't moved on. It was like you woke up one day and decided to bury any memory of him. Plastering a fake smile on your face and acting like everything was okay when it wasn't is not moving on," she paused her voice softening a bit.

"I can understand how something like that can change you but sometimes it feels like you think you don't deserve to be happy. Like you don't deserve to live your life. I barely recognize you at times. It was like a piece of you died in that car right along with Eli."

I jerked back as if she slapped me and that's when I finally snapped."You know what Mia? Fuck you!" I yelled at her. "Do whatever the hell you want see if I give a shit," I spat angrily as I threw my hand out pointing in the direction of the doorway. "Get the hell out of my room I don't want to see you right now."

I could see the guilt and regret entered in her eyes but she masked it with her usual stubbornness.

"Fuck this," she muttered before she marched out of my room a few seconds later I heard the front door slam shut.

Tears burned in the back of my eyes. She didn't know how right she was, a piece of me did die that night a piece of me I can never get back.

The first tear fell down my cheek before I could stop it.

What the fuck just happened?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi guys, I know it took me longer to post this chapter but I hope you guys enjoy it. 😊