《Heart Broken》Can't Run Now

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Your hair reminded me of fall leaves

yellow with a tinge of brown, looking like it would continue to change as time went on

Your smile, well your smile showed joy

Then I found out you're smart,

And you're even nice, and actually

Kinda funny

And 'wow' I thought

'Could this kid be any more perfect?'

I wish I had realized earlier on,

I wish I had reminded myself earlier on,

Perfection is non existent

I liked to think, you were starting to like me

I honestly sometimes don't believe anyone could like me

Then we got to talking

And to some degree

I regret it

Yet

I don't

You started off with some light conversation

But then it turned into different kind of conversation

When you asked me

'Have you ever vaped?'

I should've stopped messaging right then

But I gave you the benefit of the doubt

Of course, I replied no because I was taught that it's wrong

And I asked you if you had

And you said

'Maybe'

I told you it was wrong,

You said you'd rather live life and try things

Which to be frank, it's still wrong

Your next question, 'Have you ever had alcohol?'

Once again I gave you the benefit of the doubt,

And once again I shouldn't have

Now let me warn you,

At this moment, your fall leaf hair

And your oh so perfect smile

With your honors classes and kindness

They did not matter

Because I don't hangout with people

Who are rebels with no cause

At this point I wanted to run

Run far away from the conversation

But then you said a sentence that would wrap a ball and chain around my ankle

And hold me in place

'It helps with my anxiety'

In my life, I've been taught

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To never turn someone away

If they reach out about struggles with anxiety, depression, suicide, or anything mental health related in general

So I could not run now

You told me of your struggles

With anxiety

Depression

Suicidal thoughts

And I told you

You need to tell your parents

But you refused

Most likely in fear

About the drugs

I told you over and over

Please get help

And it wasn't until I threatened to tell them myself

That you said you'd tell your father

And I hope to the universe, that you keep to your word

Because I don't know if I can be here to help you

Your hair reminded me of fall leaves

yellow with a tinge of brown, looking like it would continue to change as time went on

Your smile, well your smile showed joy

Then I found out you're not always that smart,

And you're probably nice, and actually

Kinda concerning

And I remember when I thought

'wow' When I thought

'Could this kid be any more perfect?'

I wish I had realized earlier on,

I wish I had reminded myself earlier on,

Perfection is non existent

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