《Forbidden Love (Book One)》Chapter 12
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"Hey Brian." I said cheerfully as I went downstairs to meet them.
"Hey?!"
"Ready to head up?"
"Yeah sure."
I grabbed his arm and lead the way to my room. I didn't see nor did I pass the other occupants in the house and even though there was a slight pang of jealousy in my heart I pushed it aside. After all I did have Brian. He might not be the guy that I wanted to spend the night with, that I wanted to wrap my arms around as we snuggled and kept each other warm but he was my friend and he was here right now. In my book that goes a long way.
"So what now?" Brian asked as he sat on my bed.
"I haven't the slightest clue but I know you can change that real quick. You are the the bad boy, aren't you?" I asked as I sat next to him, drawing soft circles on his leg.
"You know I just don't get you sometimes." He said softly as he took my hand in his.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean one minute you despise my touch and act as though I'm the devil himself and the next you're behaving as though I'm the only human left on earth to procreate with. I mean which one is it?"
"I dont know what you mean...Wait are you talking about before?"
He nodded, a sad look in his eyes and I couldn't help the guilt that crept its way into my heart. I touched his face as I stared at him.
"I know I've been a bit moody but I promise you I'm done with that."
"Just tell me one thing Carr, were you using me to distract yourself from thinking about someone?"
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"I-I... Why would you ask that?"
"Just answer me please." He said softly.
"Yes, but now I know that no matter how hard I try or what I do the feelings would never be reciprocated."
"How do you know that?"
"I just know okay."
"Is it Veronica?" He asked just above a whisper making me strain to hear. When my brain registered what he just said I hurriedly denied.
"Come on Carr, its me you don't have to lie."
"I-I... I-Its... What?!"
"You like her don't you? Just admit it."
"I don't!" I shouted defensively. "I could never like her, she's a girl."
"Oh stop it with the 'she's a girl crap' and be honest with me. I've been around you long enough and I've fucked you many times over to know that you're not the same as those other girls."
I stood up from next to him and started pacing. He might be right but still I was never going to admit it to him. He was the son of the sheriff and that had trouble written all over it. I bit into my bottom lip as I thought of my escape plan. It was already too late to kick him out the house but I could kick him out of my room... But what if he told everyone? yes I denied it but after the stunt I pulled the other night it wouldn't be hard for Roni to believe him and I just couldn't stand the thought of her hating me. I sighed. My life is one giant mess.
"Brian..."
"You like her." It wasn't a question it was a statement and when I didn't immediately respond. He nodded.
"I-"
"It's okay Carr. I don't hate you and I'm definitely not going to tell anyone."
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"You're not mad at me?" I asked as I sat down next to him.
"No, I kind of had a feeling but I didn't really know until the night of truth and dare."
When I looked at him stunned and confused he continued.
"All the other girls were kissing each other and we all were fooling around. I kept watching you hoping that we could like exchange eye contact or whatever but your eyes were glued to Ron's. When she had to kiss Mike, you looked shocked and that was the first time you broke contact. To top that off you spent the rest of the night pissed off and downing alcohol."
"That doesn't prove anything-"
"When you had to kiss her you said no so fast we thought she was diseased. Then you quit the game. I mean it was either you were homophobic or ashamed of yourself, of who you truly are."
I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath. Was I that obvious? Gosh I was a mess.
I jumped as I felt a hand on mine. I opened my eyes and saw the concerned ones of Brian. His reassuring smile had me feeling a tiny bit better and I returned his smile.
"I promise I won't tell anyone."
I nodded, afraid to speak.
"If you want we could just lie down and not talk anymore."
My smile brightened at the thought. As much as I didn't have romantic feelings for him. I still loved the fact that he was always there for me. Given his bad boy ways I was originally surprised that he had a heart. Now I knew how big it really was.
"Well now you can go screw all those other girls that have been lining up for you." I said as I smiled and got under the covers.
"Yeah that's an upside." He chuckled lightly as he joined me.
He pulled me into him and I smiled as I felt my body relaxing. It was good to fall asleep in someone's arms, even if it wasn't the person I wanted it to be. We were comfortable with each other, given our history and I was glad that I finally didn't have to hide from him.
I closed my eyes and soon enough there was silence in the room as we both fell asleep.
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