When I got home I was surprised to see Roni, Brian and Anthony lounging on the couch watching discovery channel. They all looked up as I walked in and I was careful to avoid Roni's stare.

"Hey guys, what you doing here?" I asked as subtly as I dared.

"Well I came over to see you and Anthony decided to tag along."

"Oh okay. Well I'm going to take a shower."

My eyes finally met Roni's and I looked down when I saw the look on her face. I quickly made my way upstairs as I heard the sound of the tv being turned up. I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my body as I made my way into the bedroom. A smile was permanently etched into my face as I thought back to what just happened. Yes, I was supposed to put an end to whatever was going to develop but instead I ended up almost ripping the clothes off of the poor girl's body.

I shook my head as my smile got bigger. It just felt so amazing when I was with her. I mean yes it was my first girl on girl experience but it was everything that I had imagined. Whenever I'd have sex with guys it felt good and I came but I didn't even have sex with her and I already felt like coming apart. Just imagine what it would actually feel like.

I closed my eyes and let out a loud moan as I closed the bathroom door behind me.

"I hope that moan was for me."

My eyes snapped open and I saw Brian sitting on the edge of my bed. My hands instinctively went up to my chest and I covered myself with them protectively.

"Brian!" I shouted. "What the hell."

"Don't hide on my account. I'm enjoying the view."

I walked over to the door and grabbed my robe hastily pulling it around me. "What are you doing in here?"

"I was bored so I came to keep your company."

"Of the discovery channel or the make out session?"

"You know me too well." He smiled as I sat beside him.

"So..."

He wrapped his hands around me and kissed my neck. I wanted nothing more than to haul ass out the door but I remembered my plan from yesterday.

"So..." I continued.

"What can we do to occupy our time?" He slipped a hand in my robe and massaged my breasts above the towel.

I tried, I really did but I just wasn't feeling it. In fact I was feeling quite the opposite. I pulled away from him and stood.

"Look Brian, you're sweet and everything but I'm just not in the mood. It's been a really long day and I just really want to get some sleep." I could see the hurt on his face but it was quickly replaced by his blatant personality.

"Don't sweat it chica, imma bounce." He got off the bed and within seconds the door shut quietly behind him. I let go of the breath I'd been holding and laid back on the bed.

When did life get so complicated?

------------

"Carr?"

"Mmm?"

"Carr?"

I felt a soft hand on my skin and heard a distant voice.

"Mmhmm?"

"Wake up."

"No." I moaned subconsciously.

"Carr! It's late and you haven't eaten anything for the entire day. So get up."

I turned my head when my brain registered the voice and my eyes cautiously opened. "Ron? What you doing in here?"

"It's almost dinner time. You missed lunch so I decided to wake you up. I don't want you missing dinner too."

I rubbed my eyes and looked at my watch.

"Was I really sleeping that long?" I asked my voice hoarse.

"Yup, so get your fat ass up." She smacked my behind before walking out. "Don't make me come back."

I groaned before raising up and heading into the washroom. When I got downstairs I saw that the guys had left. For some unknown reason I smiled. Roni had made provision and fish stew and I wasted no time setting a plate. When I had placed my third spoonful in my mouth she walked in.

"Jeez and to think I used to set food out for you."

I raised guilt filled eyes to hers and she started laughing.

"Hey I'm kidding. Don't look so guilty. I know you would be starving so I really didn't expect you to wait for me."

She prepared a plate for herself and took the seat opposite me. We ate in silence... Well we tried too. There was too many awkward stares and throat clearing until finally someone decided to clear the air.

"Okay." Roni said putting down her spoon. "Why don't we address the elephant in the room?"

"What elephant?" I asked as I mimicked her actions.

"You know what elephant. We have never, ever, in our years of friendship been this awkward around each other."

"This is not us being awkward, this is us eating in peace." I responded jokingly but the stubborn look on her face told me that she was being serious.

"Okay fine. Let's address whatever you think we need to address."

"I know that I overreacted last night but I just want you to know that I don't hold anything against you. You're my best friend and I love you and I never, ever wanna lose that okay."

"I know."

"Good, now that that's out of the way I can finally enjoy my meal."

We both laughed, me a bit nervously and then finished our meal.

"So what do we do now?" Ron asked me after we washed the dishes.

"I haven't a clue. Maybe watch a movie?"

"Okay... Oh, I heard about this awesome movie that came out the other day."

"Really?!" I said mockingly as she squealed in delight. That earned me a death glare but she continued.

"Yes. Have you ever seen The Maze Runner 2, Scorch Trials?"

I shook my head and she looked at me stunned when she realized I had never seen the first nor the second movie.

"Girl where have you been living? Under a rock or something?"

"You know I've never been a lover of movies, I prefer to read books or magazines."

"Okay. I'll go put on both of the movies so we can watch them one after the other then maybe we could watch a scary movie."

I groaned loudly as she went into the living room and searched for the movies in Netflix. It's just like her to end the day with a scary movie. That was her life apparently. Sometimes I thought that nothing scared her but now I know gays do. I shook my head and followed her into the living room.

By the end of the second movie I was hooked and grossly un-satisfied with the end. It was after 10 pm and the rain which had started drizzling earlier was now on a full blown rampage. I reached up by the kitchen sink and closed the windows as I felt the droplets coming in and the cold breeze as it brushed against my delicate skin.

I walked back into the living room clutching my body in order to keep warm and I handed the snacks and water to Veronica. She had already turned off the lights, a tradition when watching scary movies, so all that was shown was where the tv lights reflected. The room now had an eerie glow to it and I looked at the screen to see the opening credits of the Exorcist. I had heard her going on and on about the movie so I knew she had seen it before. I couldn't understand why she could watch scary movies or even the ones she watched before. I don't think I could ever put myself through so much torment.

I went to my room in search for a blanket because I knew how the nights can get really cold and tonight was no exception. My eyes scanned the blanket from last night and for a second I thought about grabbing it, after all it was the comfiest blanket that I owned and it really did a wonderful job of keeping me warm. I picked up a smaller version of it instead and left but when I got to the stairs I said screw it and grabbed the blanket

"I was beginning to think you didn't want to see the movie. That maybe you'd gotten scared." Roni said as I returned.

"No, I just needed a blanket, place was getting cold."

"Oh." I saw how she watched the blanket with skepticism but refocused on the movie.

I smiled to myself and sat down on the floor in front of the couch and reached for the bowl of chips. Maybe she wasn't so homophobic after all. I drank some water as my gaze rested on her dark form. She was splayed out on the couch that I braced, the exact couch that Darcy and I occupied last night. Her vision was on the television and she didn't notice me staring at her. Every time she popped a chip in her mouth or giggled or even swallowed water, I felt my throat restrict and my mouth go dry.

It was both annoying and amazing.

Annoying because I knew how she felt about me and it sucked that I couldn't do anything to change that. Then again I would never force the way I feel or the way I am on someone else. I knew not everyone was programmed that way and I refused to be the reason that somebody's life changed, especially if it became traumatic.

It also sucked because as much as I didn't want to admit, I could see us being together. Living long, happy and satisfied.

It was amazing because even though I knew our love was hopeless and nothing good could come from acting on my feelings she was still able to ignite such powerful feelings within me. With one look my knees became weak and my palms sweaty. With one touch my heart was capable of doing a summersault and soaring towards the highest mountain all at the same time and I knew that she was my high and my low mixed into one.