I never did talk to Oliver about us engaging in not-so-friendly activities but in my defense, he didn't bring it up either.

It was around a week and a half into November and we'd been getting closer and closer. After a brief suspension he had for punching Ceaser (who begged Oliver to hit him, saying that he felt way too guilty) in the face on school grounds, Oliver and I had been pretty cool.

And by cool, I mean completely confused. We hadn't really kissed since that night and God, his lips were driving me insane.

"I uh- I have to go, Emerson," he'd muttered as we sat in the park one hazy afternoon after school. The same black car from the first time we'd hung out was parked in front of his house. I never asked who it was but I had my suspicion.

My gaze traveled to his eyes from his perfectly shaped lips that I hadn't realized I'd been staring at. He hadn't worn his lip ring since the first time I'd patched him up after a fight. He said the hole closed up and he was too lazy to reopen it but I knew it was because he got in too many fights. He didn't want to be in that much pain because he got punched in the lip ring again, "What? You just got here?"

We were planning to spend the day eating gummy bears and catching up on American Horror Story -which I made a Tate and Oliver comparison because come on, I just had to- but once again that black car had ruined it. I found myself looking over a it's tinted windows as if trying to dissect why he'd been spending so much time leaving me for whoever or whatever was inside.

I was really starting to hate that car.

"I know," he gave me a peck on the cheek, eyes lingering on my lips for a little before he averted his gaze. Clearing his throat, he looked down and then back at me with a hesitant close-lipped smile, "I'm sorry but I have to go."

I rolled my eyes at that as he stood, reaching a hand out and pulling me up, him wrapping the black blanket around my shoulders.

Oliver's hands had stayed on my arms a little longer than expected... Looking up, I caught him staring yet again at my lips, "Drive safe," I couldn't get my voice above a whisper and I internally cursed myself for my weakness.

And before I could kiss him, he released me, stepping back. I'd have thought that I'd misinterpreted but with the way he was looking at me and the obvious way his Adam's apple bobbed when I leaned in had anything to say about it...

I blinked, not used to rejection with Oliver, "Oh."

"Sorry... I didn't- yeah, sorry..." He'd closed his eyes tightly, dropping his hands to his sides and shoving them in their assigned pockets, "I'll see you tomorrow, alright?"

And when he opened his eyes, mine were on the ground, a new self-consciousness eating me alive. I wasn't used to being embarrassed and to be so obviously rejected by Oliver Remmer -a guy who had no problem making out a couple weeks ago- fuck, that stung.

I nodded, "yeah, I'll see you then."

And I hadn't lifted my gaze until his footsteps retreated; the sound of a car engine starting up brought me back to reality.

⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄

"Are you coming to the airport with us to get Jan?" I'd asked Jacky a couple days later. The day had finally arrived, I'd be reunited with my best friend and everything would fall into place again... No Phoenix, no Luca, no psycho-boys who only kiss you when it's convenient.

Just me, Sid, Kat, Jacky, and Jan.

Jackson rolled his eyes at that, pulling a shirt onto his previously bare torso. I saw him wiggling his ankle a little before stuffing his feet into his original Timberlands, "Duh."

Things with my brother had blown over, he was never one to really hold a grudge and I was sure it'd disappeared that day he came into my room asking about Jan. Jackson and I were back to normal... Well, as normal as we could be with mom and dad fighting again.

Sure they went on dates and were all loving but with the way Dad had paid off the bills for the next couple months in advance, Ma felt as if he was making decisions without her.

Again.

We all knew that it would blow over that time, though. Parents fight, Hell, couples fight...

"So when are you getting your cast off?" I'd asked Jackson. He'd been anxious lately and overly cautious causing him to be on-edge.

He was nervous and he didn't want to have any reason to not get back in action.

"Sometime this week, mom just has to make the appointment."

"Excited to get back on the field?"

They had a few games left so I knew Jackson had to be excited. Or at least I thought I knew that was until he shook his head.

"Yeah, not really," he'd muttered as I followed him outside and to the car, grabbing the keys on the way as he locked up the house.

"Oh..." I hadn't spoken until we were both safely in the car and driving down the street to Sid's, "Can I ask why?"

"Can you not interrogate me? I don't wanna talk about it," my brother had crossed his arms, looking out his window and for once Jacky was completely silent.

"Hey babes," Sidney had greeted once she'd clambered into the vehicle, Kat following soon after, she must've wanted to save gas.

"Jackson, can you put your seat up, please?" Katalina had asked politely, hair pulled up into a sleek ponytail and face done professionally with light makeup.

Sid, on the other hand, had her hair down and loose, second day waves from braiding it at night and face devoid of all makeup.

They were truly polar opposites.

"Yeah, sure," he'd said, moving his seat without so much as glancing back at her. I could see Kat's shocked look one rear view mirror.

"Are you okay?" Sidney had questioned once Jackson hadn't said anymore, "because normally you'd say something about her having a better seat on your lap-"

"Or you'd move your seat back and lean all the way back so you were laying on her," I'd pointed out, Jackson sending me a glare before looking back at Kat with a tight smile.

"I'm not feeling like being a dick today..." He'd said without even a hint of joking.

But fuck, he was moody.

And Kat always the one to intervene was trying to ask what was wrong, Jackson only getting more irritated by the second.

"I'm fine, Kat."

And it was silent yet again as I tried not to worry about the boy who was on his man-period.

⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄

"When does his flight land?" Jackson had asked for the third time since we'd entered the crowded airport. Sidney was listening to music in her headphones, the faint drum contributing to the thought that it'd be a song for a new dance routine. And when she started counting out steps, her feet making gestures to certain moves, I was positive that she was studying for dance.

"It should be landing in about two minutes. Come on, let's go get Starbucks," Kat had offered as we passed another Starbucks, none of us paying attention to the announcements.

Jacky scoffed, "I'm not up for all that white shit-"

And that was when I noticed that Sid was ahead of us, one earplug pulled out as her face lit up, "Jan-"

"Yeah, I know Jan is white."

And Kat must've noticed Sid's change, her eyes looking in the same direction as well as mine. We were all searching for a tall boy with a large blond quiff, "No, Jan is right there!"

And when I'd seen blue hair I was shocked, "Jan!"

"Mom?"

"Oh my God," I wasn't sure who said it but everyone seemed to be thinking it as the boy in light wash jeans and a dark blue button up had come into view. His arms were holding a large jacket, a small duffle on his shoulder, a smile on his face.

And that was when he rushed up to us, hugging the life out of Sid -who'd ran to him like a bat out of Hell- before me and Jackson.

"I missed you so much, what the fuck?"

"Bro, it's been long," Jackson had murmured with tears in his eyes that he was trying to wipe away frantically.

None of us expected when Jan pulled him into a tight hug, Jackson's forehead resting in the crook of his neck, "I missed you."

Can I just take this moment to point out that Jackuary was and is my religion?

Jackson was clutching January's back like his life depended on it, not seeming to want to let go, his breathing was labored and the smile on Jan's face got impossibly wider as he held the boy. Sidney cleared her throat and Jan's eyes popped open; they seemed to have realized how utterly gay they looked, Jackson ripping away quickly.

"Jacky, babe, how're the kids?" Jan had asked jokingly and Jackson sent him a relieved look as the tension dissipated.

"What kids?" Kat had questioned, hands fixing Jan's hair that had been ruffled in the chaos.

"The kids we're raising on Sim, duh."

Jackson smiled, hands shoved into his pockets, his eyes had yet to come off of Jan, "I think the Riley-Calligan clan is doing pretty good, Kimmy is a little bitch though since she got into high school."

"Jackson!" I scolded when an elderly couple had given us a disapproving look.

"Anyways, can we go get my bags or do we just wait for some poor kid to steal them?" Jan had questioned, things falling into an easy feel.

⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄

"I have so much to tell you," January had declared when we'd all piled into the vehicle. I still hadn't gotten over his hair and I didn't think I would anytime soon.

"We talked last week," Kat had pointed out.

"A lot can happen- it feels like I've said this before."

And simultaneously, we'd all spoken, "You did."

Jan huffed, ignoring our outburst of laughs and continuing with what he wanted to share. And we'd let him because the past few months without him were very sad and very mopey, mostly on Jackson's part.

And I didn't know about anyone else but I wanted to cherish my Jan time and listen to any thought he had amusing in his ocean o' hair (that he'd informed us was only temporarily blue to freak out his parents).

"Anyways, I convinced my aunt to let me transfer back."

And that was when I hit the breaks, stopping myself as I pulled into my driveway, "What the fuck?"

"Seriously?" Sidney had questioned and no one had paid mind to the way Kat was sending me alarmed eyes and clutching her seatbelt for dear life.

"No way..." Jackson had said, eyes bright with happiness.

"Well, school hasn't really been that good lately," January scratched the back of his head as I put the car in park, rolling up the windows before closing the garage door, "Uh, I came out."

It was silent and then, "Why didn't you tell us?"

"I didn't want you to worry about me besides, it wasn't bad just, people looked at me differently and I missed you guys so much. Rodney got this big opportunity to study abroad so I had nobody."

"Aw, Janny..." Kat had sympathized, hand on his broad shoulder before she sent him a small smile.

"Anyways, how've you guys been?" He redirected. That was one thing I loved about Jan, he didn't want to bring anybody down so he always changed the subject... Even if it was something so important to him, "I wanna hear everything."

I was about to protest but the plea in his eyes had stopped me.

"Emerson has a boyfriend," Sidney smirked and that was when I tried exit the vehicle, making it to the always-unlocked door that lead into the warm heated house.

"I do not," I called back to the teenagers who were entering my humble abode, Jackson and January carrying the bags and dropping them in the living room as Sid rummaged through the fridge and Kat planted her butt on the couch.

"Oh shut up, you guys are always all over each other," Sidney had called, digging through the pantry to get some crackers, "Bitch, ya'll in love."

"I've already told you, we're just friends," I excused, trying to simmer down the drama before Kat -the gossip goddess- got involved.

But the sweetheart had just sat there, shoving the gummy bears I'd left on the table, from Oliver, into her mouth, "Liar."

"Lies, you sit on a throne of lies."

My phone vibrated in my back pocket, January pulling it out without a second thought, "oo, from Oliver... Saucy."

"Jan!"

"Read it," Kat had called, desperate for drama as she flicked the TV's sound down, finding my life more interesting.

"Oliver wants to know if you'll meet him at the park."

Sid narrowed her eyes at me, sitting beside Kat with a plate of cheese and crackers, Katalina resting her head on her shoulder, "not dating, huh?"

"Just because we text doesn't mean we're together."

Kat smiled, "well-" Kat, I'll drown you in my bathtub if you say anything, "I mean you guys have like a total Eli and Claire relationship going on."

"Oh, I love Degrassi references," Jan stated as he sat on the other side of Kat, digging for candy.

"Me too, I mean, they're so Eclaire, if we're being honest... She holds him down just like Claire when Eli first realized he was bipolar and like Eli when Claire got cancer."

Glaring at the brunette, I sighed out of frustration, "Can we not overanalyze and try and compare my life to a Degrassi romance please?"

Kat pouted, "But Eclaire is my OTP..."

"Yeah but they don't really fit that..." Jan had pointed out, Sid agreeing.

"What about Drew and Bianca?"

"Ugh," I groaned, Jackson leaning over the couch to stare at Kat's phone which had a picture of Drew and Bianca... Of course his vision was focused on her ass, "can I have my phone back?" I grunted, Jan placing it in my outstretched hand and I got to work texting my 'Drew' or 'Eli' or whatever the fuck they were on about.

on my way.

"You're going in that?" Sid had asked referring to the spandex shorts I'd change into since we got back. Rolling my eyes, I walked into Jacky's room before pulling on some basketball shorts and his Nike slides onto my socked-feet.

It was a quick trip to the park and honestly I didn't care how I looked.

⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄

"Again?" I'd found myself asking as I made it to the park, Oliver sitting on one of the swings, making no effort to hide the blood on his face and in his hair. The cigarette dangling from his fingers was a constant reminder of how different he was from my normal friends.

Oliver's flannel that I hadn't yet returned was wrapped around me. It'd started to smell more like perfume rather than him lately and I wasn't sure if that was a good of bad thing.

He took another drag before dropping his cigarette and scraping it with the bottom of his shoe. He didn't seem fazed by the black eye or the blood that was flowing from his nose not did he seem to care about the fact that he seemed in pain when he breathed.

"Yeah," the boy had murmured out and fuck, I wanted to be mad at him but it was so hard with that little psycho smirk he had on his face and his bitten raw lips that he seemed to always have a cut in.

Maybe he needed to avoid getting hit in the face.

"Wanna tell me why you're bleeding and covered in bruises or do I just assume the other guy looks worse?" I'd forced out with a slight chuckle as he stood, arms wrapped around himself. He took a step before he almost fell, catching himself and hobbling over to me.

"I was protecting Elliot," he grumbled as I grimaced, pushing his hair away from his eyes to assess the damage.

"From what, a truck?"

"Ha ha, very funny," he deadpanned, giving me one of his flat looks and running a hand through his hair, not wen flinching at the blood on his palm.

"I try my best," punching his arm and lacing our fingers together, "come on, I'll patch you up and you can meet my best friend."

"Sidney?" He questioned.

"No, my other best friend."

"Katalina?"

"No," I sighed, trying to tug his arm so he could move.

"You have a lot of best friends, it's hard to keep track," he said, wincing when he stepped on his foot too hard and before he could fall, my hand gripped his wrists tightly.

"So I'm guessing you can't walk either."

"Not really, um, fuck," he groaned, clutching his leg as he tried to move, eventually giving up and guiding me instead, "My keys are in my left pocket, you can get my car but I can't really go home like this."

"Come on," I said, opening the passenger door for him and help him in when he gave me a confused look.

He wasn't psycho but he surely was crazy if he thought I'd let him drive like that.