Walking into the house after her, Taine saw Camila drop her bags and stretch her still limbs. The exposed skin of her back was enough to make him temporarily forget their standoff with each other.

"There's dinner leftovers in the fridge." She called as she bounded up the stairs. As he heard her bedroom door shut, he let out a breath he didn't realise he was holding.

It was getting dark now, easy for Camila to 'go to bed' and not emerge until the middle of the next day, like she often did. It was a confusing feeling, having her here.

He liked his space, his solitude. He didn't like having to be cautious or aware of another presence. But at the same time, he couldn't imagine not having her here. He saw the subtle female touches that he was unconsciously getting used to, more sunlight, scented candles. Despite the few changes in decor, he still managed to maintain the same routines and thankfully Camila's largely invisible presence (that cooked quite well) didn't disturb him during the day. He did not like being disturbed.

He knew she steered clear of him most days. Tiptoed around this glass castle afraid to crack it. He knew it wasn't out of fear, he chose to believe it was out of tolerance and respect rather than actual avoidance. Honestly, Taine liked having silence to the point where he forgot she lived with him. He could use a few moments in the day where Camila was not in his head. Sometimes when, even the silence became too loud to handle, he would go to his room, just so he could walk past hers. Sometimes she would be listening to quiet music, talking on the phone, muttering to herself or singing songs.

When he built his house his mother had made him add extra rooms, extra closest space, for a mate, for children. Taine didn't care for any of that. He just wanted a place to eat, sleep, shower and work. He didn't care about frivolous things. This wasn't a home. It didn't have a purpose until Camila had arrived. He hoped one day it would become a sacred place for them, a place where love and life could grow. Wishful thinking.

Trying to forget about her, he turned on the tv and settled for watching a live sport match. A few hours later he had unpacked, thrown his shirt in the washing machine and was making a final trip downstairs to check if the doors were locked. It was late and he tried to be quiet, thinking of Camila being asleep.

He was about to round the corner to descend the staircase when he saw movement in the kitchen. Taine could see her clearly despite the darkness.

He heard sobs that both squeezed his heart and frustrated him. Camila was sitting on the barstool, leaning on the kitchen counter crying hysterically. Her face was scrunched and she looked like she was in pain. The sobs were shaking her small body. Taine approached her carefully.

Upon closer inspection, he could see that she was crying over a box filled with an assortment of things. In the box, Taine could see letters, drawings from Sammy, other odds, and ends that obviously had immense sentimental value. There was a diamond ring in the box. Camila was clutching a photo frame, of her and Liberty. They both looked so beautiful and joyful, it looked like Libby's mating ceremony. Camila had been her right-hand woman the whole night.

Taine wasn't sure if she had even seen him approach until she spoke. "Libby got everyone to write letters to me, letters if I'm ever homesick or sad. Everyone, even people I didn't get to see, they all wrote to me."

Taine, unsure of what to do, placed his warm hands on Mila's cold shaky one. He didn't know what to say.

He wished that he was sorry. Sorry that he ripped her away from her home, sorry that he had to keep her so close. But he really wasn't. He wasn't sorry for any of it, because she was everything. And he wanted everything.

Even if it meant he would be angry and selfish, he wasn't going to change... He didn't know that it felt like he was clipping her wings and putting her in a cage.

"Libby...she's pregnant."

Camila looked up at him with a sad smile, "She told me in the letter, it's a baby girl, and she wrote 'I can't wait for you to meet her one day. She is going to adore her Aunty Mila.'" Camila was sobbing again.

Taine was afraid to ask, "What's wrong with that?"

Camila now had a distant look on her face. "Libby and I prayed for Sammy to be a girl. We prayed so much that Libby refused to accept that she was having a baby boy. She dressed him up in pink dresses until Patrick put his foot down."

She laughed at the memory.

"If I was there, we would be picking names, buying dresses, planning a baby shower, but I can't be there for her, she assumed I am not going to be there to do all those things...She said, 'one day.' I was in the delivery room when she was having Sam. And now it is 'one day.' Sams only four, he's going to forget me soon too..."

The light of the ring caught her eye. She looked at it, lips pressed together.

He put his hand on her back not knowing what else to do. She jumped at the contact.

Camila stood up from the stool abruptly. She quickly grabbed the ring and concealed it into a fist.

"Now do you see?" She broke down into more painful, heart-wrenching sobs. He saw that her pain ran much deeper was revealing, this was not the full story.

"Now do you see how much I have lost."

She held her hands in her head and cried.

Taine stepped closer towards her and wrapped his arms around her. Taine wasn't much of a 'hugger' but with her, it was different. He hoped she wouldn't thrash in his arms, he just wanted her to accept it, just this once. He was tempted to kiss her hair, to cradle her weeping face into his hands, but he knew he couldn't use her brokenness to his advantage.

She stayed in his arms for a few minutes, her cries slowly softening. His body heat seeped into her clothes and made her warmer. She didn't look up at him, knowing she wouldn't be able to take seeing his face. This is the most physical contact they had ever shared. She hated how much she loved it.

"Look at me, I'm a mess...I ruined another one of your shirts."

"It's okay."

She pulled away from him and the space where she was moments ago suddenly felt cold, empty.

"I'm going to bed."

Taine grabbed her arm, preventing her from leaving, but she yanked it out of his grasp. He didn't have the words to tell her what was in his heart.

"Taine, please. No." She couldn't even look at him.

"I thought I could try to move on but I can't. Every time I look at you I think of all the reasons why we shouldn't keep fighting this, but then I remember what I'm missing. And why it's gone. And then the pain comes back again."

Face still red and swollen she left him very confused and alone in the kitchen.

He couldn't let her get to him. He would leave her alone. It's what she wanted. Even though it hurt. He went to his office and worked for most of the night.

----------------

The next two weeks were the same as they had always been.

Taine would rise early and exercise in the morning and Camila, a light sleeper would usually wake at the sound of him doing God knows what. Mila once awake, would stay on her phone for a few hours before hunger pangs forced her out of her room. She would tiptoe into the kitchen and make breakfast for herself. Making sure she left no traces of herself in the kitchen when she was finished.

If Taine was still in the house, she wouldn't know until he had lunch at exactly 1:00. Sometimes their paths would cross and they'd make eye contact. Neither knew whether to smile or to look away. Sometimes he left for the packhouse in the morning and didn't return until the evening. Some evenings he would come home dragging the stress of the day into the house with him. She knew that her trying to do something, make small talk ( which she knew he hated) would only stretch the relationship more. So she left him alone and didn't do anything.

Other nights she would hear him come home and when she walked into the living room she could faintly smell a woman's scent. That made her heart hurt. Camila had the ability to push these thoughts to the furthest darkest parts of her mind and she hoped her fears wouldn't escape their prison. At the beginning it was painful. The distance, the emptiness, the fleeting interactions... but now it was just life.

When she had sunk into her depressive state she didn't care about anything. She would spend the day sleeping, or cooking out of boredom, but not eating. Watching movies, reading... Mindless activities that made her edgy and compulsive. Her wolfs confusion at the turmoil of emotions and lack of activity almost made her lose herself.

But she was past that dark place now, she wanted to let happiness have a home in her heart once more. Even if that happiness had nothing to do with her mate.

Camila itched to go outside. To run in her wolf form, to meet people. But Taine had made it very clear that she reeked of another pack and that until she let go of the bond that was still linking her to them, she could not go around introducing herself as the Alphas mate. She was stubborn before, thinking that letting go of her old pack meant she didn't love them, but after speaking to Alpha and Luna Hart, she realised that she was the only one that thought this.

Camila had entertained the idea, of accepting this new pack as her own. In this regard, she was the one trapping herself. It would have to happen eventually and she was dying a slow death confined in this house, with a stifling mate. Camila decided that at the end of the week she was going to tell Taine what she had decided. She had brought back some of her old self from the visit home and realised that she needed to step up and be a Luna. It wasn't fair to the pack, she was here, ready and able, she needed to put them first.

Her heart was still broken, but she needed to shove those thoughts away too. She had always been a happy person, but here she was always sad. And lonely. She only knew Taine and his beta Ivory, and even Ivory was sometimes colder and more reserved than Taine. Camila hoped that these two weren't a reflection of the rest of the pack.

Sometimes she preferred the coldness. She could steer clear of it all together. She could blame the distance between them on that rather than on herself. When he was soft and tender with her, like he was tonight, like he was in the car, those were the truly difficult moments. Moments where she almost let herself believe that she could love him.

It was on one of her secret late night runs through the woods that she really thought about what direction her life was taking. She remembered something her mother had always said to her. "You can make your own decisions and write your own story, or you can let your decisions make you." It was now time to start acting like the strong woman she was raised to be. It was time to be an Alpha.