《"Hate And Shame" -Poems of a mentally ill person-》is this love?
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You were my sunshine,
When I only saw rain.
You tought me laughter,
When I only felt pain.
You treated me with so much kindness,
When I only knew death.
You showed me I could trust,
When you took away my breath.
You acted like I was worth it,
When I felt like I was useless.
You were so sweet to me,
When everyone was ruthless .
You made me feel so happy,
When my cheeks were always wet.
You helped me through my breakdowns,
When I felt so much regret.
You were always by my side,
When the others were too tired.
You made me feel so pretty,
When I felt undesired.
You helped me throught the darkest storms,
When the darkest nights arrived.
You always held me oh so close,
When I thought I hadn't survived.
You helped me get fresh air,
When I was suffocating.
You fought for me,
When the world was escalating.
And I thought maybe you feel the same way,
I thought maybe you want to stay.
I promise that for you I'll fight,
I promise I'll be your light.
I know that this seems kind of odd,
But to me you are the only god.
The only one I ever gave my heart,
And I thought maybe we could restart.
Instead of friends, let's be lovers,
And maybe together, we can recover,
From the things we have been through,
And maybe I can love you dear,
And my heart, you can pioneer.
Because all my life my hearts been locked,
That's why my feelings left me shocked.
But now I can't contain my feelings,
And even if they call us weaklings,
I want to love you no matter what it takes,
No matter how much they sharpen their blades.
Our love can grow much stronger,
Just bear with me a little longer.
Please just hold my hand,
And this can go unplanned.
Just pack our things and go,
So our love can grow.
And all I can say is I love you,
And to me, you are my greatest muse.
29th August 2021
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