— 43. Enigmatic

It was afternoon time and Tova sat near the docks next to Ragnar and Bjorn, smoothing out the paddles to the boats they'd sail to Paris in.

Bjorn was looking around, his eyes soon locking on Harald, who stood with some of his men. "Who is he?"

"You heard," Ragnar replied and sighed dramatically, "He's a King. From Tamdrup, wherever that is."

"And you trust him?" Bjorn asked his father curiously.

"No!" Ragnar exclaimed and stared at his son as if he were crazy for asking such a question.

"I don't trust him either," Bjorn nodded while Tova didn't say a word. She found no reason to take part in the conversation.

There was a moment of silence between them until Tova sighed, slowly lifting her head. She turned to Bjorn, an uneasy look on her face. "Why do you not care for your daughter Siggy?"

Bjorn stopped, turning to Tova with an offended look on his face. "I care for her. She just reminds me of things I'd rather forget."

Tova couldn't stop the loud scoff that escaped her lips. She turned, exchanging a look with Ragnar, who was quick to agree with her.

"What kind of man takes a mother away from her child?" Ragnar commented and Bjorn scoffed as he immediately turned to face him.

"I don't know. You tell us. As I recall, you took Tova away from hers, didn't you?" Bjorn retorted and Ragnar immediately looked offended by his son's words.

Ragnar scoffed, shaking his head slightly. "That is not the way it went. If you remember, I gave Tova a choice to return to Earl Haraldson and Siggy. It was her decision not to. She chose to stay with me. Isn't that right, Tova?"

"I'm not a part of this conversation," Tova complained before turning to glare at Bjorn, "And don't you ever speak of things you know nothing about when it involves me, do you understand?"

Bjorn rolled his eyes at Tova but hesitantly nodded his head in understanding.

"It is not easy being a father," Ragnar suddenly spoke up as he aggressively smoothed out the wooden paddle, "It is even harder being a husband. Maybe I have failed at both."

Bjorn and Tova stopped and looked at Ragnar.

"No," Ragnar stated and turned to smirk at the couple as he spoke in a whisper, "I have definitely failed at being a husband."

Tova couldn't help but laugh at the man's comment and slowly shook her head.

"If there is any advice I could give you both on the notion of marriage, it would be not to marry at all. It is simply a legal bind to trap you, nothing more. You do not need to marry to prove you love each other," He explained and Tova smiled, clearly agreeing with him.

"What of the children produced?" Bjorn suddenly asked, causing Tova to immediately turned to look back at him, "They would be bastards if one was not married to their companion."

Tova laughed at Bjorn's words. She lifted her head and glanced between the two men. "Then it's a good thing no children will be produced from this 'companionship' between us. For I am barren. And even if I wasn't, I would not want a child with you."

"Well, that is rude to say," Ragnar spoke up to defend Bjorn for once, "Who doesn't want children?"

"Oh, I would love to have children but if Siggy's situation at this moment proves anything, it's that Bjorn is not capable of being a father other than to put the child in a woman's belly," She explained and Ragnar didn't bother to argue since she had a point, "Now, I am caring for a child who isn't my own."

Bjorn rolled his eyes at Tova's complaining while Ragnar glanced between them curiously.

"How does that work?" Ragnar couldn't help but ask in a curious tone, "The two of you being together but you are raising his child alone?"

Tova shrugged, not truly knowing the answer. "Ask him."

Next, Ragnar turned to Bjorn, who rolled his eyes and refused to respond. The older man couldn't help but smile, noticing how Bjorn looked annoyed by the whole ordeal.

Just then, Bjorn tossed two of the paddles on the ground before standing up, causing Tova to exchange a confused look with Ragnar.

They turned, watching as Bjorn walked over to Harald and began to question him. Tova smiled slightly and turned to Ragnar. "Do you believe he has good intentions?" She asked him, referring to Harald.

"Like any other man, he has ambitions," was all Ragnar said, causing Tova to smile slightly.

Of course his intentions weren't pure.

____

As she walked through Kattegat, Tova carried Siggy in her arms. She smiled as she swung the giggling infant around in a playful manner.

She stopped, however, when she noticed Harald sitting nearby with his eyes on her. She inhaled sharply and attempted to walk away before he called out to her.

"Princess Tova," He called out, much to her dismay, "Come and sit with me."

Not wanting to be seen as disrespectful toward her father's guest, Tova hesitantly made her way over. "Is this your daughter?" Harald asked, gesturing toward Siggy.

"No, but yes," Tova answered and earned a puzzled look from Harald, "I did not give birth to her but I have taken her under my care."

"Ah," Harald nodded calmly, "We should talk to one another. We have not officially been able to meet. I have heard a lot about you, Tova Ragnarssdottir, formerly known as Skadi Haraldsdottir."

Hearing her dead name, Tova flinched and began to glare at the man.

"You don't trust me," Harald eyed her suspiciously.

"I have no reason to trust you," Tova responded in a calm tone and sat down across from the man with Siggy in her lap, "Bjorn has told me of your ambitions."

"I will never give you any cause to kill me," Harald vowed and Tova couldn't help but laugh.

"Now, King Harald, that is for me and only me to decide," She replied, smiling slightly, "I may find reason where others do not. I am able to see what others cannot. I am my father's daughter, after all."

"Well, for now, anyway, we are allies," He reminded her in a calm tone, "And we shall go together to Paris. And we shall fight together. Is it not so? You, Bjorn, and Ragnar need my warriors. You need my ships."

"Is that so?" Tova asked him in a sarcastic tone.

Unable to take it anymore, she stood up, not wanting to hear anymore. She on the verge of walking away when Harald continued. "I can't wait for Paris, Princess Tova. I cannot wait. We shall destroy those Christian Folk! They have seen nothing yet. We are the masters now. Is it not so?"

The men around Harald began to cheer and Tova sighed, a part of her looking aggravated.

"Stupid men," Tova grumbled as she spoke to Siggy quietly while walking away, "They never think. Always willing to spill blood and conquer new places but never actually use their heads. That man will meet his demise one day, I just know it. He thinks with his heart and not his head. It is the death of many men who are fools for love, dear Siggy," She explained, her lips curling upwards into a smile, "But we are not men and I shall teach you the ways of being a woman in power in a man's world. They will claim you can either be Lagertha or Aslaug. But in truth, you can be both as I am. Have Lagertha's strength but Aslaug's wit. It is how you will survive and be held in high regard. I will show you it all one day, I promise you that."

____

On the docks, Harald was excited when his brother had arrived. The first thing he wanted to do was introduce him to Tova and Ragnar. They walked to where Ragnar stood with Tova, the two of them throwing knives at a target.

"King Ragnar, this is my brother Halfdan," Harald introduced his brother to Ragar, not that the latter seemed to care all that much, "Meet the notorious King Ragnar and his just as legendary daughter, Princess Tova, a girl known by all for her beauty, wits, and courage."

Ragnar looked annoyed and barely looked their way as he collected his blades, much to Tova's amusement.

"It is a great honor," Halfdan spoke up but felt awkward when Ragnar said nothing in return, "When do we sail for Paris?"

"You seem eager to fight," Ragnar simply stated as he continued his game with Tova.

"Yes, it's true," Halfdan nodded in confirmation, "Not just for the sake of fighting but for the beauty of it."

Hearing his words, Tova turned to give the man a curious look.

"And against the Christians, yes," Halfdan added, believing it was what Ragnar wanted to hear, "I hate the Christians. In the name of Odin, I would kill them all."

Ragnar smiled slightly at Halfdan's words. "You'll have the opportunity to kill a great number of them," He turned, giving them a maniacal smile, "Once we reach Paris."

Tova tossed another blade at the target, smiling slightly at how uneasy Harald and Halfdan looked. She tossed three more and with that, the two brothers walked off.

_____

That night, Tova sat with across a man at the feast, the palm of their hands flat down on the table as they played the knife game. The crowd cheered for Tova to go faster and she obeyed while when the man had done so, he ended up stabbing himself.

Tova smiled victoriously and stood up, Ubbe and Hvitserk running to hug her and praise her.

They soon pulled away and when they did, Siggy was handed to her by a woman. Tova smiled, pressing a kiss to the child's forehead. She walked past Aslaug and sent the woman a smile as she held Ivar.

She stopped in front of some servants, a calm expression on her face. "I believe she has seen enough festivities for tonight. See to it that she goes to bed, alright? I will return soon. There is some matters I must deal with regarding my father," She instructed and the servant nodded.

She obediently took Siggy into her arms and walked away without another word said.

_____

It wasn't long before Tova had found Ragnar. When she did, she joined him as he sat on the roof, observing all that was going on around them. "They'll be wondering where you are as I was," Tova confessed but Ragnar did not seem to agree.

"I doubt it," He confessed as he laid back down with Tova soon joining him.

"So negative," She muttered since she was usually the negative one, not Ragnar.

As she laid beside Ragnar on the roof, she eyed him intently, trying to figure out what he was thinking about. She sighed, finding her attempt unsuccessful. "What are you thinking about?"

"Paris," He responded in a calm tone.

"You must be excited to go back," Tova commented and Ragnar couldn't help but scoff.

"No," He answered but Tova had already known that to be his answer, "Are you?"

"Of course," She admitted and Ragnar felt uneasy.

There was a part of him that didn't want her to go, fearing something bad would happen to her there.

"I feel so old," Ragnar confessed softly, "When I was young I had the passion to win, but now, with age and all that comes with it, I have lost the desire. And the strength. One day, you will feel the same. As will Bjorn. Enjoy your youth while you still have it."

Tova's breath hitched, a part of her thinking deeply on what he said. He was probably right. She was barely twenty. And Bjorn was only a few years older than her. He had years before he'd lose the desire to fight.

"Do you remember that settlement in England?" Ragnar asked to break the silence between them and Tova nodded, "And you know what became of it."

"Yes, Ragnar. What of it?" Tova asked, beginning to look concerned.

"I live with such guilt because of it," He confessed and with a saddened look in her eyes, Tova nodded in agreement.

"I, too, share that guilt, you know. For I have knowledge of it and yet I told no one. Not even Bjorn," She admitted in a soft whisper.

"For that, I am sorry," Ragnar told her, a part of him feeling most guilty for involving her.

"It's fine," She sighed deeply.

A long moment of silence occurred between them before Tova opened her mouth, preparing to tell Ragnar what she had been thinking about for weeks now. "It was a mistake not to kill Erlendur when you killed his father," She broke the silence between them and Ragnar turned to her in concern, "Not every child will stand there and willingly let you kill their father as I did. Erlendur seeks revenge."

"Why do you say that?" Ragnar furrowed his eyebrows in concern.

"Someone tried to kill us in the mountains. A berserker. He wore a ring all too familiar to me. It was Horik's and then Erlendur's. I know because I saw Erlendur wear it many times. I shared a bed with him on many occasions, after all," She explained and Ragnar grew impatient.

"What are you going to do about it, Tova? Spit it out," He demanded and Tova sighed.

"I knew since you killed Horik that Erlendur would seek revenge. It is why I have slowly been gaining the trust of Torvi. She is his wife. She'd know things I can use to defeat him without him knowing that I am planning to kill him. And now, she is in my grasp. But he has her child and I can't help but feel guilty. The child is innocent. As I was once," She explained and Ragnar felt uneasy as she compared the two very different situations, "As much as you cared for me as you would your own child, you can't lie and say that a part of the reason you kept me in your care when you found out Earl Haraldson was my father was that you wanted to spite him. The feeling of satisfaction that came from me choosing to remain with you instead of my father, your enemy. The look that appeared on his face as I cheered for you to win when you and him were fighting for the death."

"You are right."

"I was the spoils of war. But that child is innocent in every way, with no knowledge of the world we live in," Tova added, a saddened look on her face, "And I would feel guilty if he were to die because I am using his mother to destroy her husband."

"Innocents are always the ones who suffer first in the art of war. It is the way of life. We cannot save everyone. Everyone dies sooner or later," He declared and Tova sighed, watching Ragnar dramatically slide off the roof.

Tova rolled her eyes at his actions but followed soon after.

_____

In the Great Hall, as the feast occurred, Bjorn had walked in and as he did so, Halfdan and Harald watched him intently. "They say he left Kattegat a boy and came back a man," Harald told his brother, who seemed amazed by the interpretation, "And because of it, he has won the greatest prize of all after many years of failed attempts. The hand of the beautiful and enigmatic Princess Tova."

The two brothers turned and watched Bjorn walk over to Tova, who was speaking to a group of men. The men seemed to be taking in every single word that escaped her lips in awe and respect.

"A young woman sought out by many, yet not have succeeded. Many of who couldn't even get close due to how protective King Ragnar is over her. She has wits to match her beauty. A sharp tongue that cuts deep into the souls of many who dare defy her. Some say she's even smarter than Ragnar. She has the love and affection of many yet only one of which does she return that said affection," Harald continued to explain.

They turned to see Bjorn walking over to Tova. As he did so, the men all tensed and watched as Bjorn wrapped an arm around Tova.

The young woman smiled up at Bjorn, wasting no time kissing him.

_____

The following day, Tova stood outside, watching the children toss a piece of leather around as a game. Tova had brought Ivar and Siggy to play with the children, knowing they needed to spend more time with kids their age.

She watched as Ivar struggled in getting the ball for himself, causing Tova to frown at the treatment toward the young boy. "Here! Give it here!" He called out, but no one seemed to toss it to him.

"Not to him," She suddenly heard one of the kids say, which earned them an angry glare from her.

"My turn! To me," Ivar insisted and Tova ended up catching the ball before it could go past him.

She smiled, wasting no time tossing it to Ivar. However, before he could throw it to another child, someone snatched it from his grasp. "Come on! Here!" Ivar called out, only to watch as Tova snatched it from the boy who stole it from him and shoved him to the ground without a care in the world.

She tossed it back to Ivar, who smiled at her. She smiled back at him, only to have it fade when another child ran over to Ivar and tried to snatch it from him. The two children began to fight over it until suddenly, Tova watched Ivar grab the ax that was in his wagon.

"Ivar..." She trailed off uneasily, "Ivar!" She shouted as she watched her brother strike the boy in the head with it.

The children screamed in terror and ran as the boy dropped to the ground, dead. Tova watched on, a part of her feeling horrified at first.

As she overcame that horror, she rushed to kneel in front of the boy. He had droplets of blood staining his face but she chose to ignore it as she cupped his small face in his hands.

"Just breathe. Breathe," She insisted in a soft, assuring tone, "You must control yourself. Or it will get the better of you. Learn now or something like this will happen again."

Slowly, Tova turned to see Floki standing from afar. She exchanged a look with him, both of them horrified by the events that had just occurred.

_____

After what had occurred, Tova had returned to her with Bjorn to find him sitting at the table in silence. He turned to her when she walked in, smiling slightly. "How was spending time with Ivar and Siggy?"

"Eventful, you could say," She walked over to Bjorn, wrapping her arms around him from behind. She smiled, pressing a kiss to the crook of his neck.

She stopped, however, when she looked down to see him holding Erlendur's ring. "Why do you still have this?" She asked him in an annoyed tone.

"Why does it matter?" He retorted, which earned an eye roll from Tova as she began to walk away.

"I was actually hoping I could talk to you," Bjorn announced and Tova sat down on the bed.

"What about?" She asked him and crossed her legs.

"Us," He declared, which earned a puzzled look from Tova.

"Us?" She asked, causing Bjorn to sigh in annoyance.

Bjorn rose from his seat. He walked over to Tova and knelt between her legs. "Since we have returned, things between us feel different. We have moments when I feel close to you, especially when I'm inside you, but then you don't want to talk, and I wonder if everything we spoke about in the mountains meant nothing at all," He explained and Tova stared down at him for a long moment in silence.