Years ago you were used to the silence, the loneliness in bed, not feeling loved and not feeling warmed by the thoughts. It was different now. Most of the time you lay in bed, gazing to the ceiling while wondering where he could be. Was he fighting? Was he feasting? Was he may be captured or wounded? What if he was dead? It were the questions that followed you every night since the day he left. You laid in every possible position and every time it all came back, how much you wanted him to wrap his arm around you. How much you wanted to feel his warm breath in your neck, his lips as he wanted you again, the heat of his body. But the bed stayed always empty, for weeks now and you almost felt depressed because you thought about it so much. You weren't a married woman ... he could have found something better then you, he could have moved on. So why did you held hope?

It was such a night in which you twisted and turned before you fell asleep. Only to be woke up hardly hours after that by one of the Vikings.

'Y/n.' He said harshly. You startled awake, not knowing what happened until you saw that shadow in the doorway, pulling the sheets up despite you weren't entirely naked.

'What is going on?' You asked with a hoarse voice.

'We need you.' He commanded. In the middle of the night? You were a healer, not the best of it's kind but you did your job. You weren't the person to handle the deadly ill, for that you had still so much to learn. You stroke the lose hairs from out of your braid over your head and tried to concentrate.

'Now? It's night.' You answered him, not entirely comfortable with him standing here in your bedroom.

'King Harald is back, he is summoning you.'

'They are back?' You whispered, more for yourself then for the man really. Normally they would sound the horns but giving it was night apparently they didn't.

'Halfdan is wounded.' And those words just froze all the joy in your body. You rushed up out of your bed and pulled something of clothes on while the Viking left again. All that way, and it seemed to take forever, you were thinking about him. How bad? Deadly? You rushed into the great hall and looked to Harald his Vikings.

'Where is he?' You asked.

'Back.' They pointed towards the bedroom in the back. You hesitated ... for a moment, before you stepped into the room and saw King Harald standing aside the bed, Halfdan laid on it, breathing and awake.

'Y/n.' King Harald greeted you but all you could look at was Halfdan. You walked around the bed and your eyes went to his chest, to his blooded clothes and the way he pressed his hand against his heart. 'Fix him up.' Harald commanded you. You only nodded, looking Halfdan in the eyes as Harald walked out. He was in pain, a lot.

'Why is it always you who needs to get hurt.' You whispered, sitting down on the edge, blurry eyes on their breaking point.

'I'm fine.' His voice sounded husky and you sniffed.

'You don't look fine.'

'I'm fine now, you are here.' He repeated. Halfdan never showed much of his affection, yes, you both where together in some kind of a way, good sex, steady conversations but he never showed more. So you were a little surprised, guessing it was the tiredness. You lowered your head and contacted your forehead with his. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes while he one functional hand curled around your neck. You kissed his cheek before pressing your lips against his and it just stayed like that for a moment, just lips against lips until you pulled back and stroke his blond hair through your fingers.

'I missed you.' You confessed with a shy suppressed smile. He studied your face, where was his dominance, his eager? You pulled away from him and started to untie his tunic, apparently somebody removed his armor already. You fingers stroke over his bare skin as you pulled it up until you saw the wound, just above his heart.

'Arrow.' He said softly. You nodded only, pulling your practical side over and tearing his tunic in two so he didn't had to move. You brought everything you could possible think of with you so you had no need to leave ... not that you wanted to. You carefully started to wash the wound out, it wasn't big, but deep and on a way to delicate place.

'Did you win?' You asked, looking up to his tired face.

'Not really, Ragnar and Rollo both lived when I got shot, the rest is rather blurry.' He cramped a little and your face pulled in concern.

'Sleep Halfdan, you need the rest.' You advised him caring. He laid his hand on your upper leg and squeezed your flesh softly.

'I thought about you,'

'Don't do this. You are not dead and I'm here.' You interrupted him, taking an ointment to ease his pain and any infections. He stopped talking and you worked as fast and careful as possible before bandaging his chest. His eyes were heavy, his face had all the signs and still he wouldn't give in to it. You stood up, pushing your shoes on and crawling on the bed beside him. He spread his arm and you laid down in the cupping of it, pressing your lips against his chest before resting your head on your shoulder. He pulls you closer and pushed his nose into your hair, something he did every damn time. His breath became more steady and you hardly dared to move, knowing that the only thing getting him to sleep was you.

When you woke up you felt empty again. You squeezed your eyes together and turned around in the vivid memory from this night. Halfdan was in the room, sitting up and trying to get a fresh set of clothes on. 'Halfdan.' You hissed, almost stumbling out of the bed because you wanted to hurry. 'What are you doing?' You asked angry, pulling the tunic out of his hands. He chuckled and in a way you were glad to hear that. He seemed rested, better even but you were pretty sure your ointment wasn't that strong so he was bluffing again.

'I'm not deadly ill.'

'No, you almost took an arrow in the heart.'

'Almost.' He pointed out. He laid his hand in the back of your knee and you murmured something in protest as he pulled you closer.

'Halfdan, no,' his hand trailed up, pushing you down. You signed, following his hand as you carefully sat down on his lap. 'I don't want to hurt you.' You said, looking to the bandage, it seemed still clean, what said the wound didn't bleed again, a good sign.

'Not glad to see me?'

'I liked you more when you were in pain.' You answered him straight forward. He chuckled, caressing your face before placing his lips against yours. You breathed in, opening your mouth so you could fully taste him, fingers scouring the good part of his chest. You missed this, you missed this so much and you admitted that in not stopping him from kissing you. It was when you were out of breath that you turned your head a little, his lips landing on your cheek. He kissed up to your ear, taking in the smell of your hair.

'I missed you.' He confessed. You thought yesterday his tiredness and delusional mind where tricking the words out of him but now he was good, awake, strong and he still admitted it ... he had missed you.