《Living With Them || StrayKids ff》{Chapter 32}
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Silence
A very loud silence
I just stood there frozen in my spot, not managing to process what he just said. I was dumbfounded to say the least.
The only thing I could do was stare in his eyes. But that was difficult as well. His gaze was so intense, it made me feel small and weak infront of him. Like a predator watching its pray.
"O-of course I'd believe you l-love me. I'm your fan after all. And you love your fans.", I stuttered so bad that made me blush out of embarrassment.
Though, what I said was the only logical explanation of what he said. He must have meant as a fan. He can't possibly love me in a romantic way, right? So I shouldn't misunderstand.
"What? That's not how I meant it.", he sighed and seemed a bit frustrated. Almost like he was mad with himself. Mad about something he couldn't do.
He looked down for a second before taking a deep breath and looking back at me again. Still in the close proximity.
I watch how he brings up his one hand, tucking a strand of my curtain bangs behind my ear. His eyes never leaving mine. Only for a split second I thought he lowered his gaze down to my lips. But it was too quick for me to realise it, as he stared back at me at once.
What caught me of guard though, was his next move.
He cupped my cheek and brought his face impossibly closer to mine, kissing my other cheek. My eyes shot up in surprise, as I stood there frozen for once more.
"Hope that makes my point clear.", he said with a warm, shy smirk, making his blush visible.
He realised how surprised I was because of him and he chuckled lowly.
"Just wanted you to know that, I don't love you only as a fan. You mean so much more to me. I was too afraid to say it, considering the circumstances, but I couldn't hold it anymore.", he added feeling sad and disappointed.
My heart sunk when I heard his words. No, this can't be. He can't- We- How am I supposed to get through that now? He said he loves me but it will never work. And we both know it.
"Felix...I-"
"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted to tell you how I felt, not force you to return my feelings. You don't need to respond or anything. I know this can't work out either way.", he bitterly smiled and before breaking the distance between us, he kissed me on my forehead.
I instantly went up and hugged him, not wanting to let go. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he held my waist tightly. I wanted to tell him so many things but I couldn't. My mouth seemed to not collaborate with my brain. There were so many things I wanted to confess but my tongue felt numb and my mouth dry. All I could express, was the need for me to hug him. And thankfully, he seemed to understand that.
Breaking the hug, he took a step back but still chose to hold my hand. Silence filled the room, no one of us dared to speak. We just stood there staring at each other.
Both very shy I might add.
Just then, the door slamed open abruptly, startling the living shit out of us both.
"Yo, is the hot chocolate ready yet, I'm- oh.", Changbin stepped in curiously but when he saw Felix's and my hand locked, he stopped mid-sentenced his words.
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"Am I interrupting anything? I'll leave if you don't want me.", He continued.
"N-no mate, you can stay. Nothing to interrupt.", Felix was quick to reply, looking embarrassed. He then let go of my hand and rubbed his neck instead.
"Mmkay.", he eyed us both, clearly not believing him.
"So... About that hot choco..?", he questioned slowly, probably wanting me to understand him better this way.
"Oh right! Here.", I turned my body to grab the mug and hand it to him, smiling nervously.
"Mm smells nice! Thanks Rosie. I'll be waiting outside.", He said and stepping out of the door.
"Oh and by the way, Hyunjin said he wants to give a try that carrot cake.", He shrugged in disbelief and left the room.
Hell no. Are my ears deceiving me or does The Hwang Hyunjin want to try carrot cake for real?
"Are we talking about the same Hyunjin here?", I asked Felix in disbelief. But he was far from replying to me. He seemed as surprised as I was.
"Beats me.", He shrugged.
And after that, we both burst into laughing.
Oh dear, that will be a memory to have after he eats it.
Taking a step to the counter, I nicely place the rest of the orders to a tray and held it up.
"Shall we go?", I smiled at Felix who was watching me the whole time, smiling.
My heart might burts any moment if he keeps staring at me with such a beautiful smile.
He nodded his head playfully and held the door open for me.
"Ladies first.", He said gesturing me to the door, with a warm smile.
"If you insist sir.", I giggled and stepped out the room.
Thankfully, we are not awkward with each other after what happened earlier. I was afraid he might not want to talk to me after that. Afraid that he might get mad at me for not being able to say something. But I was wrong. He seemed better than before. More refreshed and energetic. The reason unknown to that, but I don't care, as long as he's happy, I'm happy.
And maybe it's better if he doesn't know that I actually feel the same about him. It will get harder for us both to let go. It's better like that.
Hopefully...
"What took you so long? I almost thought that you got kidnapped or something.", Minho cocked an eyebrow.
Well Minho's mom mode is activated now.
It feels like he tied me up in a chair, with a lamp above me, interrogating the life out of me.
It's always like that.
"Sorry mom. We were talking and we lost track of time.", I replied mocking him with the 'mom' word. Well I wasn't practically lying. We were talking..if you only except the skinship part.
yEaH.
tAlkIng
Felix coughed awkwardly when I said that, making me cough in return. The guys were eyeing us weirdly.
Way to go, now they will seriously not believe us.
"Yeeeah sure, whatever. Come sit with us now. We have something to discuss.", Minho commented as he patted the seat beside him on the couch.
Well fork
What do they want to discuss? My funeral? Clearly they would want to kill me and Felix after our little inTerACtIoN earlier.
One thing's for sure.
I want black roses in my funeral.
Or maybe hyacinth?
What the heck am I saying? As if they would do my funeral....
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They will probably throw me off a cliff full of crocodiles to erase their marks of their crime.
Yeah that's more like Minho.
I stopped spacing out after a second or two and made my way towards Minho. The rest of the boys were scattered around the same couch, as it was specious enough for all of them.
Well sort of
If you except the part where Jeongin is sitting on Chan's lap.
Poor Innie, his face screams 'save me from this kangaroo'
As bad as he seemed to be, I couldn't help but laugh at the sight. Chan's teasing him so badly, I'm actually impressed Jeongin copes with him.
Or not.
"So... What did you guys wanted to talk about?", I finally said once I made myself comfortable on the couch. Though, I can't hide the fact that I felt a bit nervous. I don't freaking know what thoughts run on these people minds.
I watch as Changbin takes a sip out of his drink and how Jeongin deeps happily a chocolate chipped cookie on his milk. Minho took a bite of his carrot cake, enjoying every moment of it.
Though, I can't say the same for Hyunjin.
Him on the other hand, seemed..how do I say it? Afraid? Afraid of the carrot cake?
His eyes examined every corner of the dessert, disgust showing on his face.
"Just take a bite already. It won't bite.", I snickered, a smirk creeping on my lips.
I hear the other boys snicker as well as Hyunjin glared at me.
"Ha ha. Very funny.", He rolled his eyes, "I just want to clarify that is edible for me to eat.", He defended.
"I'm eating, so it is edible, you little prince.", Minho mocked him.
"If you were to eat a rock, you would still be alive. So I can't take you as an example.", He backfired.
rOaStEd
"Yah!", Minho was about to beat the life out of Hyunjin but he was fast enough to hide behind Jisung's back.
"Hey! Don't use me as a shelter. I don't wanna die because of him!", Jisung pointed at the older member, who was currently about to kill Hyunjin right then and there.
"If you don't shut your mouth, you'll die for sure.", Seungmim commented as he was watching the whole scene.
"Fine, fine. Min chill out. I'll try that c-carrot cake. So don't kill me please.", Hyunjin gave up and he took the plate in his hands. I sneakily pulled out my phone to record this moment and savour it for the future.
Muahahaha
Cutting through the spongy cake, he slowly brought it up his mouth with trembling hands. After about a whole minute of fighting over with himself, he tasted the cake.
To say that he was about to vomit, would be an understatement.
His eyes squinted in disgust and he coughed gagging. He quickly gulped down a whole glass of water, trying to wash out the taste.
"WHAT THE- EW WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?! YOU TOLD ME THAT IT WOULDN'T TASTE LIKE CARROTS!", he exclaimed yelling around the whole coffee shop.
"Shh! Drop it down, you'll wake up the whole neighborhood with your screams.", Felix whispered-yelled at his friend, who was now drinking water from the sink like a dog.
"BAHAHHAHA THAT-WAS-PRICELESS.", I said between my laugher as I was rewatching the video that I took of him few minutes ago, wipping my tears.
"You didn't-", he gritted his teeth.
"Oh but I did.", I smirk devilishly.
"Delete that right now!", He warned me but I didn't budge. Instead, I stuck out my tongue, making him come running towards me.
Oh shit
I stood up from my seat and started running around the place, laughing like a maniac.
"Come here you little devil.", he chased after me and to my dismay, he caught up pretty easily with his long legs.
Like, how am I suppose to run properly with these short legs I've been born with?
It's unfair
"Come and get it baby.", I giggled, hiding behind a table, praying that he won't catch me.
Because if he does, I'm done for.
"Don't provoke me, 'baby'. You know I will.", He chuckled dryly, taking slow, steady steps, dangerously coming closer to me.
Well shit
How many times have I said that by now? Meh
I watched how he rested his hands on each side of the coffee table, leaning his head closer to mine as I had stopped on my tracks, looking at his every move, with my phone clutched on my chest.
"Now then, either we do this with the easy way or the hard way. You decide.", he growled lowly with a glare.
I have to admit. That was hot.
"Mmm lemme think.", I pretended to give it a thought, "Mm nah I'm good.", I stuck my tongue out, smirking.
"Fine by me.", he shrugged his shoulders indifferent. And in a splitting second he was infront of me. I couldn't even process how swift his movements were when he jumped on the table and came infront of me on the other side.
What the-
"Umm- h-hey..?", I stuttered surprised, smiling innocently at him.
"Don't 'hey' me, love. Now give me that damn phone before I take it myself.", he whispered huskily.
I tried to run again but he grabbed me before doing so, tacking us on the ground with a loud thump.
Ouch
So now the mighty Hwang Hyunjin is hovering above me. Fucc.
He tried snatching my phone from my hands but I fought back, preventing him from doing so.
"Umm, guys? A little help here..", I trailed off before Hyunjin started tickling me to death, "FELIX HELP!", I yelled afraid of what my ending was going to be.
To be honest, I don't even know why I called for Felix instead of anyone else here.
Oh
I might know after all...
ahEm
Not even a second passed and I felt Hyunjin's body leaving mine abruptly. Someone had pushed Hyunjin away from him.
Looking up, I see Felix staring down at me. He stretched his hand, gesturing me to take it. And so I did.
He pulled me up and wrapped an arm around me, "Don't even dare to do that again to her, mate.", his tone was serious but he tried not to get mad. Though it was clear he was.
"Ugh fine, I'll let that slide just for this once.", he said defeated, standing up and going towards the couch to sit.
"Thanks.", I cheekily smiled at Felix as he smiled back, "Anytime.", he replied.
"Now now, after this commercial break we just had, shall we get to the point now?", Minho clapped his hands and we both walked towards him.
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