The streetlights twinkled like the stars that night.

My shoulders shook as I shuddered against the brisk fall breeze. My eyes were on fire as I felt the goosebumps rise all over my skin. Why do my knees feel like someone was dragging a pencil in a circle?

Foreign cool palms covered my eyelids as I attempted to take the heat away. Eyeballs shouldn't be hot. Are my hands always this rough?

Everyone's voices felt so far away as I watched their bodies retreat into the abyss. No one was making eye contact with me. The chain-link fence groaned as I leaned against it. My hands dropped to my sides and I felt the muscles in my face activate one by one.

My lips felt like they were being torn apart as my cheekbones cracked from severe underuse. I'm a mopey girl, aren't I? An inner voice that I had never heard before chimes in my mind. Does he feel bad for me? Maybe it was more familiar than I originally assumed.

"Verona." Eli's voice called out to me. My eyes fluttered open as I pivoted my body to face him.

"Elijah." I giggled, my smile ready to rip my face apart.

Happiness is painful.

His eyes were red and low as he studied my face. The birthmark above his lip danced whenever he spoke. "Are you good to go home?"

I hadn't thought that far ahead.

My brain hit the brakes on my heart. Was it beating at all? A cold sweat broke out on my back and my breathing became stilted. I thought I'd stay here, but I can't tell him that.

"I-I um..." Elijah was scrutinizing me. He's judging me. He wants me gone. "I'll call an Uber." I blinked rapidly as I tried to cool my burning eyes. I pushed myself off the unsteady fence, fumbling to reach my phone in my back pocket.

My phone acted like I was a stranger, demanding that I put in my passcode. Appalled, I struggled to remember the six-digit code that was supposed to be my birth date. When is my birthday?

It was on a sunny but cold day. I spent the whole day helping my mom bake the cake. Everything had to be perfect.

The hours I spent, painstakingly working on individual invitation cards would not be wasted. I had glitter glue under my fingernails as I handed them out to everyone in the class.

My voice had an noticeable tremor as I told everyone that there would be a magician at the party. My chest hurt as I watched everyone whisper to each other. The rest of the day I watched as my classmates fumbled with their invitations, and I forced myself to keep a straight face as I noticed a few in the trash.

Nonetheless, I helped my mom with the decorations and the cake. My extended family and neighbors arrived on time and they watched in awe as my Uncle Terry pretended to make a rabbit disappear. I, however, stayed by the window chewing my lip anxiously as I waited for even one classmate to appear at my doorstep.

My parents practically dragged me from the windowsill, forcing me to listen to everyone sing happy birthday. I couldn't look at anyone. Their presence was merely obligatory.

My chest hurt and it was becoming increasingly difficult to breathe. I sucked in as hard as I could and blew out the candles before the audience could even begin to start asking how old I was.

I ran out of the living room and up the stairs. The gaze of every one were weighing me down. The sounds of my parents calling me felt like echoes as I locked myself in my room.

My wails couldn't drown out their apologies to the polite group and it certainly couldn't drown out the pounding on my bedroom door as they begged me to come outside.

"Verona!" Eli grasped my upper arm. My eyes drifted up to him, but I couldn't make out his face. "Why are you crying?"

I blinked and the world became clearer. Tears tumbled down my cheeks heavily. "I'm...so sorry." I breathed out. My heart hurt. I didn't want to feel it beat anymore. I think I wanna die.

"You're shaking." His eyes widened as he pulled me closer to him. "Where did you go just now?"

Where did I go? I wish I had disappeared that day.

I went to school the following Monday and kept my head down. I tried to ignore the casual chatter of the students around me about their boring weekends without feeling too embarrassed.

Gym was brutal. I got picked last for dodgeball. The last straw was when I got asked to sit out due to the uneven number of students. I burst into tears in front of everyone. Though I couldn't see the annoyed glares from my peers, I heard "Oh my god here she goes again." Almost instinctively, I swallowed my cries and croaks. I didn't want to be a burden.

"I can't remember my password." I chuckled sadly as I tore my gaze away from him. My phone had gone back to sleep due to inactivity. Sniffles gave way to more tears. I tried to suck my breath in again. I shouldn't cry in front of him. "I'm sorry," I repeated.

"For what?" Elijah was bewildered. His calm disposition evaporated at my sudden mood change.

"Forgetting my password." My laugh was hollow. I wiped my tears away, biting my lip to keep my emotions at bay. Eli stared at me, clearly unsure of what to do next. "I'll be fine," I reassured him as I forced a smile wide enough to crack my face in half.

I pulled away and turned towards the road as I considered walking back home. "I think you might be too high to go home alone." He said from behind. He shuffled over and grabbed my arm again, leading me inside.

"No, I'll be fine." I insisted. The thought of being a burden repulsed me more than walking home. "Please Eli, I promise." My body steeled itself in resistance.

"You burst into tears after I asked you if you're okay to get home." His grunts echoed across the lobby as he struggled to pull me up the stairs.

"It was because I forgot my password." I insisted as I grabbed the banister to anchor myself.

"Please just do it for me." Elijah stopped pulling at my arm to beg. "I won't be able to sleep, knowing you didn't get home safely."

"I can."

"At least hang out with me for a while. I'm about to order food and I know your ass is hungry." He smiled as he continued to pull me up the stairs. My resolve weakened.

Did he really want me there?

I let Eli pull me to his apartment. I wanted to find out how much he truly wanted me there. He sat me down on the couch beside him. I felt like a bystander in my own body.

"What do you want on your pizza?" He asked me quietly as his fingers hovered over his phone screen.

"Meat lovers." I exhaled as I became the couch.

"Oh, I've got some meat for you." My hands stuck to my face like magnets as I let out all the air from my lungs. I keeled over in tears from Elijah's joke.

My obnoxious laughter had him chuckling as well. "It wasn't that funny." Eli deadpanned, but neither of us could contain ourselves for long.

An hour later, I had unraveled on the couch after inhaling the pizza. Why was food so good? I stared up at the ceiling as shapes and shadows from the television were projected.

"You up to play some video games?" Eli offered after a while in silence.

My head felt like a dumbbell as I moved to look at him. He was already up, setting up his console. My eyes lit up as a familiar racing game displayed on the screen.

"Hell yeah," I mumbled, forcing myself to sit up.

"What you know about this?" Eli grinned as he passed me a controller.

"I know I'm gonna kick your ass." My face cracking smile made its return.

"I hope you know I'm about to smoke you." He said lowly as he plopped onto the couch.

Eli was right. I definitely didn't stand a chance.

"You cheated!" I pointed at the screen as I lost my sixth race in a row.

"No, baby girl, you lost." The smug man pinched my cheek as I stared ahead in awe. Each time I started in first, only to lose at the last second. I balled my fists and crossed my arms, huffing loudly. "Oh, don't be like that Rona."

My nose wrinkled as my fingernails dug into my palms. My lips puckered as I tucked them to the side, trying to keep my smile in. Elijah was on his palms, trying his best to get in my face. "You just need some practice."

Flashbacks of the events that occurred just hours prior rushed through my mind. My cheeks reddened as I sat back in my seat. Eli mirrored my actions but kept his eyes on me.

We stayed quiet for a while until Eli put his legs on the couch. I tried to scoot down to allow him some room, but his hand reached out and grabbed my arm again. "Come." He simply said.

His eyes had lightened since I last looked at him. His warm hand brought me back to reality. Kicking my shoes off, I climbed on top of Eli and laid on his chest.

I just need practice.

I never thought I would get this close to someone so quickly. My head jumped with each passing thump of his heart. He was so warm. His fingers traced circles into my shoulder as I fought sleep.

I was melting into him. I stared at the TV screen, replaying my failed match with Eli. I wanted to turn away but my face was glued to his chest. I couldn't leave.

"Your skin is really soft," Eli mumbled as his circles grew larger.

"Your heart is loud," I replied.

His laugh made his body come alive. I had almost forgotten that I was laying on him. I put my hands on his chest and stared at him for a while.

His top lip was brown but his bottom lip was pink. "Can I help you?" He asked, still wracked with laughter.

"I just need practice," I whispered, not taking my eyes off his lips.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm a good kisser, I was rusty."

"You don't have to prove anything to me." He snickered, his finger switched to lines that brought my sweater lower on my back. I shivered as his hand explored my exposed skin.

"Give me a second chance." I pleaded, pushing myself up. I adjusted my legs to avoid cramping and I began to straddle Eli.

His eyes traveled and he shifted uncomfortably beneath me. "Verona," He groaned while holding my waist to keep me steady, but I already put my plan in action.

I tucked my hair behind my ears and bent over, connecting our lips.