《Louis' Depressed Girl》Chapter Twenty-Six: I love you always
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A/N: You are all so awesome, I just can't believe we hit 19k! Soon I'll hit 20k! (: Thanks for all the support guys!! You mean the world to me. And should I share my playlist for this story? Like the music that inspires what I write? (: Comment your answer. xx
Mia's P.O.V
"What are you doing here Louis?" I question, still shocked by him standing in from of me.
"I had to see you." He frowns.
"This late?" I question. I look over at the wall clock and notice that it is nearly 1 in the morning.
"How are you?" He spat out.
"Huh?" I ask, thrown off a little.
"I mean, how have you been?" He mumbles.
"I'm good. They are really helping me pull through. But it has only been a few days." I shrug. "How about you?"
"Like shit," He groans, making me frown.
"Look Louis. This isn't easy for me either. But you have people counting on you. I don't want them to get upset or anything." i explain. I know he's been through a lot as well. With my mixed emotions, witnessing my problems. I just feel like a burden on the boy.
"I had a concert tonight actually." He smiles, sending one on my face as well.
"How was it?" I ask.
"I felt, I don't know... Odd at first. But I actually laughed and smiled for the first time since.." He trailed off.
"Yeah, since the last time you were with me." I sigh, "I want to be with you Lou. I honestly do... But I just need to focus on getting better you know?"
"But you can get better if we just talk about that! So we can understand all of this! Understand the dilemma! Understand... Us." He frowns.
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"Fine," I huff, "Lets talk. Ask me anything. Its better than some stupid therapist anyways."
"Okay. Why do you do it..? T-the self harm, how did it start." He asks, my mood darking.
"I was young at the time. Happy to be at a new school ya no? I thought everything would be fine but I guess not. I was bullied my whole life up until I dropped out of school and joined online schooling which I ended up quitting after 3 weeks." I explain, running out of breath.
"What was her name?" He question.
"Jenna," I mutter, still cringing at the name.
"Any more?" He whispers.
"Yeah. I was teased for being so fat and worthless, so I began believing them. Sure, my dad would tell me how gorgeous I was and my mom would always complement what I was wearing... But when I stared in that mirror I was disgusted. Like that ugly girl in the mirror was me, and I just felt so insecure. Thats when I learned what starvation and bingeing was. God, I felt so guilty yet amazing. I don't know," And thats when the tears began to fall.
"I'm so sorry Mia." Louis tells me, pulling me into his arms that I so desperately missed. "I love you,"
"Louis, I love you too. So much. I'm sorry for being such an idiot. For not keeping up my side of the relationship," I sob.
"Shh. Mia. You don't need to apologize. I was the asshole who didn't realize that I had a beautiful girl who is so fragile. I needed to be there for you. But when we went to the club the alcohol brought back my older days when Eleanor left me. God dammit, I regret it all. And I want you to know that." He explains, rubbing away the tears falling from my cheeks. "I just want things to be normal again. I haven't done anything for weeks. I've wanted to visit but I didn't know what to say."
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"No I understand. Things have been better though Lou. I've found help, gained wait, wrote down my feelings. They actually told me that I have to stay for two more weeks and I should be good," I smile.
"What?" He smiled back.
"Yeah. I just wanted to tell you that. I just like how it feels to be happy now. Its so much more different than my sadness. And I like the change." I tell him.
"I'm glad you're staying strong Mia, I really am." He tells me, reaching in for another hug that I gladly lean into. I'm glad for all of this. The warm feeling in my heart again, knowing that I'll be leaving this place in 2 weeks, and being able to watch disney movies with Louis till 5 o'clock in the morning. But I still fear what will happen. If I could really trust Louis. But in a way I do now. Over the past few weeks not only have I been focusing on myself, I was focusing on Louis and I. If we would be back together. If we've both changed.
"I'm glad you came here." I whisper into his shirt.
"Why?" He asked.
"Because you made me realize that I love you to the moon and back." I smile, hugging him tighter, fearing that I would lose him again, and I never want to.
A/N: No this is not the end. Don't worry. I'm sorry its short but I have two other fanfics to update that you should all check out! I have a Niall one and a Larry one (: So go give those a read. And I will be updating Friday.
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