《Hating Old People ~ Kakashi's Daughter Naruto Fanfiction》9) More Family Dinner and Amateur Stalkers
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DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO. Yay, an update!! Happy now Lissa strudel?? ;P
Kida's POV
Today has definitely been one of the longest days of my life.
I completed my journey to the 'Not So Hidden Village in the Leaves'.
I met my father, which didn't go nearly as well as I had planned it... But I guess a kick to the shin is pretty much the equivalent to a hand shake these days.
I got chased through the streets and over the roofs of an unfamiliar village.
I was almost burned to a crisp by a fire breathing, wanna be dragon.
Attacked by multiple idiot clones.
Tackled to the ground by an adult male.
Tied up with enough rope to absale down the Hokage faces (that's right, over dinner I've been educated on the landmarks and history of Konoha. So I know that that crazy mountain over there is supposed to be historically and culturally significant.)
I've been 'highly encouraged' (to the point where I have no choice) to reside in Konoha with my 'father' Kakashi.
And I am now sharing a meal of barbeque with said father and my new self-appointed 'Uncle Guy'.
Now, I've met some pretty stupid people in my life.
The guy that thought he could pull off cow leg warmers.
The blonde lady that was convinced she could win the next round of roulette. Every. Damn. Time.
And there was that one misguided soul who decided it would be a good idea to challenge a upright walking, human talking shark with a ridiculously big sword, to a duel.
But nothing could have prepared me for the idiot in front of my eyes now.
...Oh Naruto, you unfortunate creature.
I shared a bored look with Kakashi as the disguised Naruto asked us for our orders in a deep, muffled sort of voice. Kakashi sighed and hummed while looking over the menu.
I picked up my own menu and looked over it absently, my gaze lazily drifting every few seconds over to, the now red in the face and excessively sweating, Naruto.
Well if Naruto is here, then the rest of the team must be who's been watching us. I looked out the window where now I knew Sasuke and Sakura were watching us.
I could have some fun with this...
Sasuke's POV
What a loser.
There's no way they don't know that's him.
I glance over at Sakura with her eyes wide and mouth hanging open in disbelief.
I'm surrounded by idiots...
When I looked back, Kida was staring out the window again in our direction. Her eyes were emotionless as she stared out the window at us. Without blinking or letting her eyes stray from their fixed point of the roof top where we were hiding, she began twirling the menu in her hands around in front of her.
That's sort of creepy... Or intimidating...
Sakura edged closer to me on the roof top causing me to reflexively roll my eyes.
"Y-you don't think she can see us can you?" She stuttered quietly. "She's looking right at us, it's creepy..."
I sighed deeply before answering, trying to convince myself as well as Sakura. "She can't possibly see us in the dark at this distance, nobody's eye sight can be that good." I replied keeping my gaze on Kida who was still staring unblinkingly out the window as she continued twirling the menu around between her pale, delicate fingers. Her gaze somehow seemed more sure than before, as though she could sense our discomfort and that confirmed our location to her.
"But she's looking right at us now!" Sakura whisper yelled.
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I saw a small twitch or movement from under her mask and her now devious looking black eyes crinkled slightly at the corner.
My eyes narrowed as I glared down at the devil in the window.
Was that a smirk? Did she just smirk at us? She couldn't have possibly heard Sakura just now... could she?
Just then, Kida put her menu back on the table and seemed to be speaking with Kakashi. The weird green guy across from them also seemed to be running his mouth off at them...
Kida'sPOV
Kakashi had given our orders to the 'waiter'. And 'Uncle Guy' was continuing to give me the basics on Konoha's history, culture and economy (apparently all the things my 'youthful' self should know since I'll be residing in Konoha provisionally). As well as throwing in a few good natured, but slightly inappropriate, stories about him and Kakashi in their youth.
I kept zoning out during his ranting, but I did manage to catch the key words 'out house' and 'acorn'. I snapped back in at that moment wondering what those two things had in common. I looked confusedly at Kakashi who was death glaring Guy from across the table. Guy, having noticed this, began laughing nervously as he scratched the back of his head.
"Well... That's enough about me and Kakashi..." Guy said as beads of sweat began to dot his fore head still under Kakashi's glare. I was surprised thunder and lightning hadn't ominously shrouded our table...
At that moment, our 'waiter' clumsily placed our meat tray in the centre of our table, and appreciating the distraction, we all began to fill our individual plates.
Naruto's POV
Alright! They haven't noticed it's me yet! Believe it!
I've been trying to listen in on their conversation but it's getting noisy in here and I don't wanna draw suspicions on me by creeping around their table all the time. But I probably looked just as creepy pressed against the wall around the corner from their booth...
"Excuse me!" A voice I don't recognise says behind me. Quickly adjusting my fake nose and glasses on my face I turn around to see a bossy looking woman in a waitressing apron with her arms crosses over her chest as she looked me over. "You don't work here." She stated simply.
Quick, gotta thing fast. Say something, anything!
A tall man came up beside her with a stern look on his face. My eyes focused on the gleaming 'MANAGER' badge on his broad chest.
I could feel the sweat streaking down my face as I managed to stutter out. "Well... Um... Yer... The thing is... I'm a really great ninja and..."
"..." "..."
Pain shot through my back side as I landed roughly on the hard gravel road in front of the restaurant.
I got up slowly, rubbing the point of impact, "ow ow ow ow ow", getting a few curious glances from walkers by. Grinning sheepishly, I stuffed my hands in my pockets and casually strolled around the corner of the building where the lights didn't reach before I jumped onto the roof tops again and went to report back to the team.
Kida's POV
Well, that was by far the most interesting dinner I've ever had. And this includes the dinners that Ms Takashima would throw cutlery at me from across the table.
After Naruto got kicked out, Guy began stuffing his face proclaiming that it was a 'challenge' to see who could finish their plate first.
Kakashi and I exchanged sideward glances before I fluidly tossed my menu in front of my face, slid down my mask and used the chopsticks to down my plate of food before slipping my mask back up, placing the plate and chopsticks down on the table in front of me, and catching the menu between my fore and middle fingers before it could hit the table.
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I looked back up at Kakashi with a blank expression. He was staring back at me with a light smirk under his mask. I looked down at his now empty plate, my eyes widening for a moment before looking back up at him with an almost close eyed smile on my face. He now mimicked my expression, before we heard a heavy spluttering from the other side of the table. We both looked towards Guy who was all red in the face and was thumping his own chest with his fist as he tried to dislodge the piece of food that I'm guessing is caught in his throat.
We both stared at him for a moment, wide eyed before jumping up at the same time. Kakashi appeared beside him and began thumping his back. Hard.
A 'too big to swallow in one go' sized piece of meat flew out of his mouth and projectile past my head, over the back or our booth and hit the guy in the next booth in the back of the head with a very audible, and slightly moist sounding, thump.
I reached into the aisle and grabbed a glass of water from the tray a passing waitress was carrying (how the wait staff hadn't noticed one of their customers dying, quite loudly, is beyond me) and put it in Guy's hand. He took it gratefully and began chugging it down.
Kakashi and I sighed in relief, but that relief was short lived when I felt an ominous presence behind me. I looked at Kakashi's face, his one visible eye widened slightly as he looked past me before he took on his casual demeanour again. Keeping my face expressionless, I looked over my shoulder to see...
Simply put.
A scary looking man.
A very scary looking man.
A very tall, scary looking man.
A very tall, muscly, scary looking man.
A very tall, muscly, scary looking man with scars on his face.
A very tall, muscly, scary looking man with scars on his face and death drilled deep into his soulless eyes that looked like they had seen the pits of hell and liked to relive what he had seen there using innocent, orphaned children...
... But he seems nice enough...
I turned back to Kakashi, and the now fully recovered Guy who was grinning sheepishly at the really swell guy behind me.
"Ahh! Ibiki! Didn't realise you were dining at this fine establishment tonight as well!" Guy said ecstatically.
"Hmm... Well I am. I don't usually get hit with half chewed food when I eat out though, but I suppose times are changing... For the worse..." Ibiki said in a deep monotone voice as he glanced between Kakashi and Guy before his eyes landed on me. "And who's your companion?" He asked with mild interest.
"Ahh! That would be my lovely niece, Kida! Kakashi's daughter!" Guy grinned down at me.
"I didn't know you had a brat Kakashi." Ibiki said looking between me and Kakashi.
"It's a recent development..." Kakashi stated shrugging with a masked smile.
"She seems a bit more along for a 'recent development'. How old are ya kid?" Ibiki asked nodding at me.
I gave a quick glance at Kakashi before replying. Ibiki seemed like an alright guy, behind his seemingly permanent 'strike the fear of God into you' vibe.
Kakashi seemed genuinely relaxed with this person around. I guess that's good enough. "I'm 12" I stated simply, looking back at Ibiki.
"Hmm..." He considered me for a moment. “You're a bit scrawny for a brat you age."
... Scrawny? ... Brat? OK then, I see how it is...
I raised an eye brow at him, and stood up straighter. "Got a problem with it?" I asked, ok, maybe it could have been taken as a challenge... I could take this guy!
He looked me over again before smirking down at me. "Alright kid, maybe when you grow into you fathers shoes, we can see if your worth my time. But until then, you keep growing."
...What a bitch...
My eyes narrowed slightly as I stared at him for a moment longer before shrugging and looking away into the distance lazily.
Whatever. I'm bored. I wish I had my book with me... Haven't read it all day, I think I was getting up to the part where the boy and the girl both realise their feelings for each other. How have I not read all day? Well it has been an eventful day... Damn... Now I'm tired...
A cough from across the table caught my attention. Kakashi was looking between me and Ibiki worriedly while Guy just sat there grinning his toothy grin.
"Well it's about time we went home. So see you around Ibiki." Kakashi said with a small wave. "Come on Kida" He continued while nodding his head in the direction of the door.
I looked up at Ibiki as I walked past him towards Kakashi. "See ya Ibiki" I said giving him a wave and a small smile from beneath my mask.
A hint of a smile crossed his face before going back to a rock. "Bye Kid"
Yeah, he's alright...
After paying the bill, Kakashi and I exited the restaurant with a surprisingly silent Guy right behind us.
I looked at Kakashi, Kakashi looked at Guy, I looked at Guy, Guy looked from Kakashi to Me, to Kakashi again... To Me again... Then Back... Then back again... OK, now this is getting weird...
Kakashi put his hands in his pockets and looked in the direction of 'our' apartment. "... Well... We're gonna head home now..." He said looking back at Guy.
Guy stood there grinning. "Excellent idea Kakashi! A young power of youth shouldn't be out at this time!" He exclaimed stepping towards me with his arms open wide for a hug.
No. No. No no no no no. No. I'm not living through this again. My eyes widened as I watched the green blob come towards me in what, for a moment, seemed like slow motion. His toothy smile gleamed in the dimming street lamp light.
Faster than I could jump out of the way, Kakashi jumped in front of me and spun Guy around in a headlock. "Excellent point Guy. So I'll be getting Kida home right now." Kakashi said with a closed eye smile as he pushed Guy back in the direction he had come at me from.
When Guy turned around again, he was still grinning. "Well I'll definitely be seeing my dearest niece again soon, you too Kakashi. Stay youthful!" He said striking a thumbs up, grinning, winking pose at us.
"Well, see ya..." Kakashi waved still smiling at Guy. As Guy turned around and began striding away... In all his youthful glory...
Kakashi looked down at me still smiling. "Ready to go home?" He asked.
I stared up at him blankly for a moment before 'home' really registered in my mind. Ms Takashimas house was my last home. For two years. I didn't think about it that much when I left. It was the only home I had known since I was with my mother, which I can't remember much of. Now I have a new home with my father, Kakashi...
"Lead the way Kakashi" I said smiling back up at him.
"You can call me Dad if you want..." Kakashi said suggestively, still looking at me out of the corner of his eye, as we turned and began walking towards home.
"No thanks, Kakashi is fine..." I replied monotonely, keeping my eyes where I was walking. "So, did you wanna get rid of them before we get back to the apartment?" I asked, bringing up the amateur stalkers that still had their eyes on us. Do they really have nothing better to do?
Kakashi seemed to consider this for a moment before replying "Yeah, I should probably step up their stealth training. And teach them how to hide their chakra better as well..."
"Chakra?" I asked looking up at him confused by the unfamiliar word.
He looked down at me, slight surprise evident in his one visible eye. Before he smiled again. "I'll explain on the way, ready to run?"
I smirked back up at him, "Always".
And with that, we began running and jumping over the roof tops. I could sense who I now knew were Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura following us for a little bit. But as we began dodging and weaving more, and changing directions they soon stopped a good distance behind us.
We jumped down from the roofs and slowed to a leisurely walk on the gravel path between the houses as Kakashi gave me a lesson in basic ninja knowledge (which was very interesting). We continued to walk in the darkness, Kakashi seemed to finish the lesson as we reached our apartment block.
I followed Kakashi through the door of 'our' apartment and flopped down on the couch, falling asleep immediately.
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