《Finding My Luna (Sequel to ICBTAM)》Chapter 8- His Protector
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I had just put on a shirt, trying to pull it over my ever growing stomach when I saw something shift in the mirror. My eyes moved up and I saw him standing there.
I turned around, looking Rafe over. He just stood there, staring. I couldn't judge the look on his face. Shock? Horror? What was it? I suddenly felt self-conscious. Maybe he was put off by the fact that it looked like I'd eaten a bowling ball.
I started to turn back around, avoiding his eyes when he crossed the room. His hand reached out for mine, forcing me back around. He could tell that I was self-conscious.
"You're beautiful, Katarina. I was just shocked at the change. It hasn't been that long."
It was as if he could read my mind, but I knew that wasn't possible. We didn't have the connection that allowed us to communicate like that anymore.
Alarik put his hand on my stomach, and the baby chose that moment to kick right into his hand. Rafe smiled wide until it fell. Something was troubling him.
"What is it? Did you find the rogues? What happened?" I asked him.
"We didn't find them. They're evasive. They don't want to be found and they know what they're doing. I came back because I was told this little guy could pop out any minute." Rafe once again smiled, but there was a sadness to his voice.
"Why do I get the feeling that something's wrong...something you're not telling me."
He sighed heavily and looked up, meeting my eyes.
"Maude told me something...something that isn't good at all."
My heart felt like it was about to stop. What could she have had to say? She hadn't told me anything that I would have classified as 'not good at all'.
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"What was it?" My voice was barely a whisper.
"She said there may be complications...with the delivery."
I blinked once, not saying anything.
"What sort of complications?" I finally asked.
"She isn't sure you'll be strong enough to stand the rest of the pregnancy. The baby has grown so fast that she thinks there could be internal damage. Beyond that, actually delivering the baby could be dangerous for you. Especially without your wolf."
"Him," I said.
"What?"
"Him, the baby is a boy, not just 'the baby'."
"Out of everything I just told you, that's what you're latching onto, Katarina?"
"Yes, that is what I'm latching onto because he is our son. I guessed there were going to be complications. It would be stupid of me not to think there would be, but he's our son and we'll make it through them."
"You could die," Rafe said, gripping my hand tighter.
"Or I could live. Nothing is certain, nothing besides what I'm about to tell you right now."
Rafe's eyes were dark, staring deep into my own.
"No matter what happens, you are going to make sure our child--our son--is okay."
"Katarina," Rafe started to shake his head but I held a hand up for him to stop.
"The one thing I'm afraid I can't do, is protect my child. My fear is that I'm too weak to do it. I'm not going to let that take control of me, I'm going to do what I can to make sure I'm able to protect him. I want you to do the same. I want you to be his protector."
"But I can't lose you," he whispered.
"And I can't lose him. I guess that leaves us with one option."
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Rafe looked at me expectantly.
"We have to get my wolf back."
"How do we do that?"
"If I knew the answer to that, I'd have her, already."
"Katarina. You've tried everything anyone can think of. I know how much this is haunting you, but I don't think it's something you can force."
"Maybe I should go to a witch. Do you think there's a spell that could help?"
"I am not letting unknown magic around our unborn child," Rafe said quickly.
"Even a witch you trust? You don't want to try something that could help both me and our son because you're afraid of magic around him?"
Rafe ran a hand through his hair. I knew he was contemplating it. This was something I not only wanted, it was something he knew I needed. Time was wearing down fast. I gripped the dresser and bent over slightly with a grunt.
"What's wrong?" Rafe asked immediately leaning over me.
"He kicked. I'm okay." I didn't want to tell Rafe that I was starting to feel weird. It felt like all my energy was gone, like I just wanted to go lie down for a while.
"I'll see if I can get a hold of Amelie. Maybe she can help." Rafe left the room murmuring to himself. I wished I had my hearing back so I knew what he was saying as he made his way down the hall to his office.
I rubbed my belly and sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You're really not giving Mommy any breaks, you know. You just need to listen for once."
I leaned back as much as I could and looked up at the ceiling.
"We don't even have a name for you yet." I wondered if maybe there was some sort of system Rafe's family did for naming, some Alpha families did that. I never got the chance to meet his parents, they'd been gone before I'd ever shown up. His father had died, but his mother...I wasn't sure what happened to her. I didn't even know his father's actual name. It was only Alpha Granger or The Blood Wolf. It was what his father had been called, and it was what he was called.
For all I knew our child was going to be named Rafe the...well, some number.
Rafe was right. I had tried everything I could think. I'd tried to get in touch with the goddess again, and she hadn't answered. I'd tried coaxing my wolf back out, but that wall wouldn't release her. If it was even my wolf to begin with. However, I hadn't tried it with the witch's help. If she could put me into some sort of trance, something that would allow me to get into a state where I could speak with the goddess again, then maybe I could get some new information. Some new clue as to how I could mend my broken soul.
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