《Midnight Birdsong [Dreamnotfound AU]》Chapter 22: Furry Udders
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Clay watched George weave back through the crowd but Techno quickly redirected his attention to the other guys apparently waiting to meet him.
He looked at the unfamiliar faces with the ones he recognized from the other school.
"Hi, I'm Clay, these goofballs call me The Dream." He smiled in a friendly way.
"Harvey-" a guy in a green, orange, and red costume shook his hand- "but you can call me TapL." He was kinda short with short black hair.
"Cool. What are you drinking? I don't think I've seen that one before."
TapL looked at the rich gold liquid in his cup. "This is Strongbow Gold Apple Cider; it's my favorite."
"Hey- I'm Eret, nice to meet you."
"Hi Eret. I like your... Elmo?"
Eret laughed. "Yeah, I would have spent more time on a costume, but it was never meant to be."
Eret had fluffy-looking brown hair; he patted the weird red snake-worm thing over his shoulders. "This guy's like my pet tonight."
Tommy just appeared. "Well at least you aren't going full furry like those guys."
"YOU KNOW WHAT TOMMY-" Fundy padded over angrily, followed by Zelkham, Mega, Spifey, and someone new in a little reindeer onesie.
Fundy walked right up into Tommy's face. "You know why I wore this Tommy?"
"Hey, Clay," said Zelk.
"Hey."
"NO, because you probably expected to be made fun of." Tommy replied to Fundy.
Fundy was dressed like a fox with a cute little black hat over his fluffy fox ears.
"Yeah Tommy, I knew you'd make fun of me but I want you to stop so I wore it again."
I don't see the logic there.
"Well-" Tommy whipped out his phone and took a picture of angry fox Fundy- "now I have photo evidence so I'm making fun of you forever."
"Pffffffft, Tommy will you send me that?" Tubbo asked.
"Yeah of course, Tubbo. There you go. You want it Clay?"
"Uhhhhh."
I don't want Fundy to be mad at me but also this is really funny.
"Yeah send it to him. I don't care." Fundy crossed his arms.
"Yeah! Tell him, Fundy! He can't call us all furries!" Vurb legit just popped up out of nowhere. He was in a pug costume in a Cookie Monster costume.
"Yes, I can. You guys are all furries."
"Hey-" Zelk raised his arms- "I'm not affiliated with them."
He was dressed as a reindeer thing though. "I'm ZelkTheElk."
"Well I AM affl- afflat- aspirated with them." Spifey stood with Fundy and Vurb.
"FURRY GANG!"
"No, guys-" Fundy pointed to his costume- "I'm not a furry. It's just a costume."
"Yeah we're all dressed as furries!" Vurb was like, super excited. But he also looked like he didn't know what was going on.
"Soooooo- anyway, Clay, have you met Callahan?" Zelk introduced the guy next to him.
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"No, I hadn't. Hi"
"Hi." Callahan was in a deer costume kind of like Zelk's but a darker brown with what looked like a Captain America mask.
"I don't think I recognize you from the field today."
"Yeah, we're on the B Team. Not very important." Eret said from the edge of the furry argument between Tommy, Fundy, Vurb, and Spifey behind him.
"HEY MAMAS!"
Sapnap crashed into the group, specifically Clay. "WHAS UP?!"
He was wearing a white tie around his head and a white t-shirt with a little flame on the chest. He had definitely already finished a few drinks.
"Hey Sappy Nappy."
"YO, you guys will not believe what Brad just did. He threw a cup at Gogy's FACE."
"What? Why?" Clay asked.
"Because-" Sapnap hiccuped- "he was aiming for me but he throws like a girl." He grinned and laughed.
"Ayyy-" Sapnap looked around- "where's Wilbur?"
Oh yeah, that's weird. He normally sticks with Techno.
Techno waved his hand. "I don't know, I don't keep him on a leash. Wilbur's a free spirit."
"Hey, Techno-" TapL got his attention- "is it true you have a pool?"
Techno smiled. "Yes."
Another song started.
Day to night to morning, keep with me in the moment
I'd let you had I known it, why don't you say so?
Didn't even notice, no punches left to roll with
You got to keep me focused, you want it, say so
>>>
George left the kitchen feeling a little sick, but with another drink.
It still didn't taste good.
He saw Mumbo in the hallway talking to one of the guys from the soccer team, Wilbur.
He hesitated because he knew Wilbur was close friends with Techno, but what the hell, might as well find out what they're talking about.
Mumbo was talking, "-So you rub against the udder and milk comes out."
What the fuck now?
"Wow," Wilbur said, "that reminds me of this time I was trying to get this cow to move, hey George, hey Fundy, but this cow right-"
"Hold on, hold on," said Fundy who was suddenly just there. "I was there for that."
"Yeah! You were." Wilbur nodded at him. "You wanna say what you said?"
"Yeah ok." Fundy turned to Mumbo and George.
I guess this is just a casual conversation now.
"So Wil was trying to get the cow to move and I shoved it and I was like 'Listen BUD, with your 4 udders-' Wait, no wait, it's one udder and 4... wait..." He was confused.
"Teats," said Wilbur.
"What?" It was like Fundy was trying to solve his own riddle.
"Teats," said Wilbur again.
"What? Teeth? Did he have teeth on his- That's crazy."
Wilbur laughed. "No, but DUDE I would love to have udders with teeth on them if I was a cow."
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"Alright I'm kind of weirded out right now."
Me too.
"No one would fuck with you man," Wilbur continued.
"Yeah, but like- out of disgust!"
George looked at Mumbo in confusion. He just straightened his tie; he was wearing a red tie and a nice black suit.
I guess his costume is a businessman? He looks weirded out too, though.
"Well- udder teeth," Wilbur said.
"Yes?" Fundy said back like a question.
"Why wouldn't you want that? What's weird about udder teeth, man?"
"So- would you like, eat with your udders then? Or is it just like teeth with no mouth, like absolutely no function."
"Well I would use them as a weapon. Teeth are a weapon as well as a mastication tool."
"So you shove your udder in people's faces?"
"Yeah. I could- I could do it. You want to test me?"
"I- I- Wilbur- Imma pass on that one."
Wilbur laughed and Fundy continued. "I'm honored, and I'm flattered, but I-"
"Declining my udder offer, how could you?"
"I'm declining your udder in my face."
It was here that they both burst out laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of their conversation.
George decided to leave.
I guess I just don't get sports.
George gave a small wave to the patient Mumbo and exited the conversation. Wilbur and Fundy were now excitedly talking about some revolution.
George didn't know where to go so he just circled back to the big room where most people were talking and dancing. There were, of course, some people just snogging in the corners. George saw Clay chatting with the other soccer guys on the far side of the room.
Most of them weren't in elaborate costumes; Sapnap just had a white shirt and tie around his head. Thinking back, George remembered Wilbur had been in his trademark gray beanie and yellow sweater. Tubbo on the other hand was in a bee costume and Tommy had on some kind of British uniform. A bunch of the guys were wearing what looked like pajama onesies. One of them was dressed as a girl.
"Say So" by Doja Cat started playing and George heard a little squeal to his left. It was Bad just jamming out with Skeppy in the dance area. "I love this song."
George smiled and leaned back against the wall, watching them dance.
They're both pretty bad dancers.
Nevertheless, it was cute to watch them bop along to the chorus, then Bad shrieked and covered his ears at the swearing part. He just started dancing again when it was over and Skeppy smiled at him.
Neither of them noticed George there, but he didn't mind. He preferred to dance in his room.
"Doja Cat."
"What-" George hadn't heard a6d come up next to him. "Oh, I didn't see you there."
"The song." A6d's eyes were on Skeppy.
"Oh yeah weren't you going to kill Skeppy?" George looked back and forth between them.
"I still might."
"Why haven't you already?" George looked sideways at a6d.
A6d shrugged. "It's fun to chase him around, and Bad and him probably dance together a lot but-"
He got cut off when Skeppy caught sight of him and let out a high-pitched scream before yeeting himself the opposite direction.
A6d was after him in a second, screaming in French.
Bad just ignored them and kept bopping.
All the other people in the room just kinda glanced and went back to drunk dancing, but George watched excitedly as Skeppy clambered over the couch and a6d just vaulted over it. The chase went on around the room like some sort of action movie with Bad just freestyling in the middle.
Skeppy frantically dashed through the soccer guys and knocked a few of them over to block a6d but he just jumped over them and snatched at Skeppy; the slippery little duck escaped his grasp and fled out of the room.
George suspected a6d would give up pretty soon, so he just wandered around again. He noticed the song "Gimme Love" by Joji start playing and pretty soon he stumbled upon the Hermitcraft Club casually getting buzzed in a side room.
George just hesitantly entered, he was fairly familiar with most of them. Grian saw him first.
"HEYYY George! Nice shoes, mate."
"Heheh." George was starting to regret the boots. "What's your costume?"
"Can't you tell?" Grian spread his arms -wings- out.
"A chicken?"
Grian laughed. "No, I'm not a chicken that would be ridiculous."
He flapped his arms, "I'm POULTRY MAN!"
"OH" What's the difference?
"Hey, George." Mumbo came up to say hi. "Yeah I saw you earlier. I like your glasses. Me and Grian were both going to come as Hobbits, but that didn't last very long. I'm a little disappointed, actually, I had the name Bumbo Baggins and everything."
"Aw don't say that Mumbo, I think you look positively dapper in that suit." Grian shot him little finger guns.
"Heh, thank you. You look like a chicken."
"Awwww." Grian pouted.
George laughed, he knew they were just kidding.
"HALLO." Iskall joined the chat.
He was dressed like a tennis player, but holding a golf club.
I don't know if he is also confused by sports or I just know nothing.
"Are you-" George didn't know whether to say tennis or golf player.
"Golfing."
"Yeah I said we weren't doing that." Grian eyed Iskall's outfit. "But even if we had, Iskall, we wouldn't have matched because Mumbo and I were thinking of British golfing in Scottish kilts."
"I'm glad we didn't do that, actually. I think that would have gotten uncomfortable," Mumbo said.
"Hey guys-" a guy George didn't know in a bee costume and helmet thing came over- "are we still playing Truth or Dare?"
"Yeah! George, this is Xisuma, X, George. You want to play with us George?" Grian kindly invited him to join and George accepted.
I guess technically this is my first party game. He took a sip and sat down to play.
(2k words)
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