《Lord Day and Lady Night》14. Conscription
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"Good morning. Welcome to Empire House, how may I hel—you! Avaunt, infidel!"
Amy stuck her parasol through the crack in the door and put on her most charming smile. "A very nice mornin' ta ye, too, Karim. May we come in?"
"No!"
"Let me rephrase. Do ye want me ta take me clothes off out 'ere on da porch?"
"No!"
"Now may we come in?"
"Mmg...nnrr...yes!"
"Thank ye."
Amy curtsied, by pure coincidence deeply enough to give Karim a good look at her cleavage. With a tortured groan, the bodyguard covered his eyes and stumbled back into the entrance hall, whereupon Amy promptly strode inside. The moment she entered, every single eye belonging to the multitudes of clerks in the hall turned towards her and widened as if they had never seen a woman before. Which, taking into account the work hours dictated by the bugger who owned this place, was probably the case.
"'ello, everyone." Waving, Amy gave the poor worker ants a coquettish smile. "Don't mind us. We've just got a little private business with dis gentleman 'ere."
"Err...we?" enquired one of the clerks at the front.
Amy frowned—then she glanced around, only to find that Patrick and Flo were still standing outside the open door, their mouths agape.
"What are ye waitin' for?"
"For you," Patrick said, his eyes travelling up the giant, austere façade, and back down to the bustling entrance hall of the massive office building, "to explain how you are able to get into this place. I am rather well-informed about London's upper echelons. And in case you did not know, this is Empire House!"
"Aye. And?"
"Empire House! The headquarters of Rikkard Ambrose. The Rikkard Ambrose."
"Oh, ye don't 'ave to worry. Da stingy bugger ain't 'ere right now. 'e's away on 'is 'oneymoon. Which means..." Striding forward, Amy grabbed Karim's arm. "...we can borrow dis one."
"I am a man," Karim stated darkly. "Not a book from a lending library."
"Oh, I know!" Amy assured him. "I'd never borrow a book." She glanced at Flo and Patrick again, who were still staring at her as if she had grown an extra head. "Well? What are ye waitin' for? Come in, come in!"
Cautiously, they did as she said. With quite a bit of secret satisfaction, she noticed that even Patrick, supreme sovereign of noble conceit, seemed to be somewhat cautious in this place. He glanced at the big bodyguard beside Amy.
Amy gestured between the two. "Karim, Patrick. Patrick, Karim. Say 'ello, get ta know each other, compare beard sizes or whatever ye men do. But be quick about it, we've got work ta do."
"Karim." Karim gave a curt bow. "Bodyguard to Ambrose Sahib. And you are...?"
"...unfortunate enough to currently be forced to accompany her." Patrick nodded towards Amy, who promptly sent a glare his way.
"Oy! Watch yer mouth!"
Karim inclined his head sombrely once again. "A pleasure to meet a fellow victim."
"Oy, ye two! I'm standin' right 'ere!"
"Is there no way to escape?" Karim enquired.
"I fear not." His Lordship shook his head. "This is a serious matter."
From behind her little hand, Flo gave a muffled giggle. Amy sent a glare her way, then jabbed her hand at the two men.
"All right! Now that ye've 'ad yer fun at my expense, let's go somewhere a little more private, shall we?"
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"Let's not!" Karim said instantly.
"Don't get yer turban in a twist, ye old worrywart! Deese two will be comin' with us. Yer virtue will be safe."
Karim looked as if he wasn't too sure about that—but then his gaze drifted to Flo, and his shoulders relaxed slightly. Apparently, while he didn't put it past Amy to engage in threesomes, he still thought she would draw the line somewhere.
Hoozah! I've got a good reputation, after all!
Flo, meanwhile, had her own interpretation of Karim's look. Skipping over to the humongous Mohammedan's side, she patted his musclebound arm, which was about as thick as her waist, and smiled up at him.
"Don't ye worry. I'll protect ye."
The interesting expression that spread over Karim's face at those words instantly improved Amy's mood.
"How sweet." A grin as wide as a behemoth banana spread across her face. "Da bodyguard 'as got a bodyguard. I'll 'ave ta tell yer boss about dis. Maybe 'e'll prefer Flo's services. After all, I bet she'd come a lot cheaper."
Sending her a "don't you dare"-glare, Karim marched off towards a nearby door. "Come! If you wish to speak with me, let us be done with it. I do not have much time at my disposal."
They followed Karim through the indicated doorway, and found themselves in a large room with a low ceiling and rows upon rows of shelves, stuffed to the brim with dusty files.
Karim nodded. "No one shall disturb us here."
"Ye don't say."
"Get to the point, woman."
"As ye wish." Amy started to recount the events of the last few days in a quick and concise manner. Well...perhaps not entirely. She might have lingered a little bit on a certain scene involving a rope and candlestick, as well as some other narrative highlights, but hey, why not? Flo's grin and the expression on His Lordship's face whenever she mentioned the word "candleholder" was definitely worth it!
"...and since we need some muscle, I immediately thought of ye!" Amy concluded, throwing a significant look at Karim's biceps, and assorted other -cepses.
"Do not," the bodyguard told her, his face wooden, "look at me like that."
"Yes," Patrick agreed, his voice suddenly dark. "Do not."
Amy blinked, glancing at him. What in the world was that supposed to mean? And why was His Lordship suddenly avoiding her gaze?
Patrick cleared his throat. "Ehem. So, Mr Karim...are you willing to help us?"
Eyes narrowing, Karim cocked his head. "Let me recapitulate...you wish me to accompany you to fight against one of the most dangerous street gangs in the city of London, illegally break into and enter various residences, collect classified information and, finally, do all of this in surroundings that will most likely be a mixture of a filthy hellhole and a den of iniquity?"
"Exactly. So, will you help us?"
"Not a chance!"
"B-but, Mr Karim..." Clasping hold of one of his fingers, which her tiny hand was just able to reach around, Flo gazed up at Karim with her big, shiny eyes. Hiding half of her face behind her hand, Amy grinned. Karim was beaten. He just didn't know it yet. "Please! D...dey're just girls...and dey're scared, and...please! Won't ye 'elp? Ye're so big, so strong..."
"Well, ehem." The bodyguard's back straightened, and his chest thrust out more than it already was. "It is indeed true that I am quite formidable, but..."
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"Please?" Nearly dangling from his hand, Flo gazed up at him, a desperate plea glittering in her eyes. It would have had more of an effect on Amy if she hadn't seen the little girl use the very same expression to convince passers-by to buy a bunch of matches, after they had been treated to a heartrending story of her non-existent sick mother and starving seven siblings. "Please, please, please, please?"
"Err...well, I...um...I fear it is not within my...I mean...I could theoretically, of course, but..."
Amy's grin widened. A squirming Karim was a wondrous thing to behold. Too bad they were pressed for time.
"Let me put it like dis, Karim." Beaming, Amy sidled closer to him. "If ye do 'elp us, ye will make a little girl smile and ye'll feel a wonderful, warm, fuzzy feeling. Whereas if ye don't..." Leaning towards him, she grabbed hold of his ear and whispered something.
The Mohammedan's face paled. Quite an impressive feat, considering it was tanned and weathered as old tree bark.
"You wouldn't!"
Cocking her head at the humongous man and helpless victim, Amy gave him a sweet smile. "Do ye wanna bet?"
The bodyguard swallowed. "My faith prohibits me from gambling."
Amy's grin widened. "Is that a yes?"
"Hrumph. Hmg. Well...yes. I suppose I'll help."
"Thank you!" Leaping up, Flo threw her arms around Karim's arm and hugged him tightly. The big bodyguard stiffened, his eyes nearly popping out of their sockets. Amy could almost see the warning signals flaring over his head. A female was pressing her chest to his arm! True, you couldn't really tell the difference between that particular female's chest and a flat board of wood, but it's the principle that counts!
"I'll help you! I'll help you!" Desperately, Karim started to shake his arm, trying to throw Flo off—then seemed to remember that smashing little girls against wood floors was also not consistent with his faith, and ceased. Flo grinned and hugged him even tighter.
"I...I shall help you," Karim repeated, trying to ignore the existence of his left arm. "But so far, you have only said we will be going after the girls who were taken. You did not tell me how, when and where. How exactly are we supposed to rescue those girls? We don't even know where they are!"
"Flo?" Amy nodded to the little girl, and Karim winced, painfully reminded of the smiling miniature female still clinging to him. "Tell 'im what ye told us on da way 'ere."
"Aye!" The little girl's expression turned grave, and she nodded quickly. "We do know where dey are!"
"How?" Karim demanded. "And, ehem...will you let go of my arm?"
"I over'eard dem!" the little girl beamed, completely ignoring the second part of his words. "Dose bastard ratbags ain't as smart as dey think dey are! When dey brought da other girls away from da room dey kept us locked up in, dey didn't say a word about where dey were bringin' us—but the wooden floor above da cellar was full of rat 'oles in one corner! I managed to shuffle over into da corner without any of dem noticin', and I listened da entire time dey talked!"
That's my girl!
Grinning, Amy patted Flo's head. "Well done!"
"Yes, ehem. Very well done." Karim cleared his throat. "Now would you let go of my arm?"
"What did they say?" Patrick had spent most of the time intently listening and watching. This was the first time he had spoken in a while. Glancing over at him, Amy saw his eyes were focused and fiery, as he wanted to pry the truth from Flo's mind with the pure force of his gaze. "What did you hear those vermin say?"
Flo's face twisted. "Well, most of da time da bastards talked about what dey'd do ta us if dey didn't need ta deliver undamaged goods, and what dey'd—"
"We don't need to hear anything about that!" Karim hurriedly interjected.
"Aye? Well, dey talked a lot of filth and rubbish! It was enough to make me wanna puke. But later in da night, one of dem brought around a bottle of rum. Once dey got drunk, dey got a lot less careful, and started ta get chatty." A wicked smile spread across the girl's face, suddenly making her sound a lot less innocent. Amy had to work hard to resist giving her two thumbs up. "By da time dey took dat one girl up, dey were completely plastered! 'er name was Leona, and boy, did she fight like a lion! Kicked da bastard who was supposed to drag 'er away in da balls she did, so 'ard he passed out! Dey 'ad to get a new one to 'deliver' 'er, and 'e didn't know where ta go." Her grin widened. "So 'e 'ad ta ask da others."
"And you heard." Patrick's eyes were burning with zeal.
"Aye." Flo nodded firmly. "They said da girl wouldn't be taken straight to da customer, 'cause 'e ain't in town, but some place else in da country. So she'd be sent ta some bugger called Whitlock in Athelstane Road to be 'stored' until she'd be sent off in a sealed carriage."
"And you think she might still be there," Amy concluded.
"Not just 'er," Flo met her eyes. "Ye know as well as I do, dis time of da year, most nobles and rich arsewipes are away in da country. So she might not be da only girl sent dere for da time bein'. And even if she is, she might 'ave 'eard where da others were taken. Either dat," Flo added, glancing up at Karim, "or dat Whitlock knows where she is, and we can beat it out of 'im."
Karim glanced down at the little girl still dangling from his arm. "I must say, I like the way you think."
Grinning, Flo squeezed him once again, and regret flooded the poor bodyguard's face.
"In future, keep yer gob shut around 'er," Amy told him, smirking. "Ye'll find it's much safer."
"Noted," the bodyguard growled.
"So..." Fixing him with a piercing stare, Amy took a step towards him. "Now dat ye know what we're up against and what we're gonna do, are ye still gonna 'elp us?"
"I already said I would. And I have never," the Mohammedan told her, his beard bristling like an angry bear's pelt, "broken my word. Besides...beating evil into submission..." Cracking his knuckles, he placed a hand on the hilt of his sabre. "That sounds like suitable work for me."
"Spiffin'!"
"Yes." A grim smile on his face, Lord Patrick Day stepped forward. Not to get a bow, a kowtow, or some other obeisance a noble might want to receive, but to extend his hand. "Excellent. Seems like you are a man after my taste, Mr Karim."
Meeting Karim's eyes, determination flared up around him. Amy swallowed. For a moment, just a moment, he looked like...a white knight. Her white knight.
Karim looked somewhat taken aback—He was probably more used to receiving scornful glances from members of the British peerage than handshakes—then tried to lift his arm, until he realized Flo was still clinging to it.
He raised an eyebrow.
"Oh, very well." Grumbling, the little girl let go. Karim stepped towards Patrick, and the two men shook hands, their eyes meeting and holding for one long moment.
Amy almost could hear the words.
Let us do this!
Yes! We are real men!
Look at how hard we squeeze each other's hands!
Amy rolled her eyes. But, for some reason, she couldn't help but smile at the two who might just be specimens of that rare species she never thought to encounter: good men.
"When and where?" Patrick asked.
"Tomorrow," Karim said decisively. "There's no time to waste."
"Tomorrow." Amy agreed. "I've still got some preparations to make. Athelstane Road is right smack in da middle of da slums. We've gotta move fast, but we can't be reckless."
Karim nodded. "Agreed."
"We should send a note to the Inspector informing him about Whitlock," Patrick said. "Just in case things go wrong."
"Agreed," Karim repeated.
"Disagreed," Amy scowled. "But I suppose ye're gonna do it anyway, ain't ye?"
The two men nodded.
"Oh, all right!" Amy clapped her hands. "Anything else?"
They shook their heads. No more words were necessary. They were ready.
Amy nodded, then smiled. "Great! Shall we meet up again tonight at eleven at the Pussycat Pala—"
"No!" Karim and Patrick cut her off in a chorus. "We shall not!"
"My ye're picky! All right, den. Where den?"
"How about Westminster Palace?" Patrick suggested, aristocratic hauteur in every word.
"Oh, well..." Grinning, Amy shrugged. "I guess one palace is pretty much like another."
Karim made a choking noise. Patrick grabbed her by the arm and started pulling her towards the door.
"What's da 'urry?" Amy enquired.
"I am removing a dangerous creature from this place before that poor man suffers a heart attack," Patrick growled.
Amy smirked. "With 'im, dat's just about da only way a lady would ever get 'is 'eart racin'."
"May I remind you that we need his heart, his fists and the rest of him in working condition? So move your derrière and come with me!"
They were out in the hall by now, Flo trailing after them, watching the free floor show with interest.
Grinning, Amy cocked her head up at him. "Are ye so sure ye're eager to be alone with me?"
It took a moment for her words to reach His Lordship's mind. When they did, his footsteps stopped abruptly.
"I...I never said..."
"Are ye blushing?"
"Certainly not!"
"Then why are ye turnin' yer face away."
"I, um...I am a peer of the realm! Why would I want to look at a lowly woman like you?"
A few days ago, those words would have made her spitting mad. Now, they only made her grin wider. Reaching out, she grabbed his hand. A warm, strong hand.
"Well, whether ye want to or not, ye're gonna 'ave ta spend some time with me."
He swallowed and half-turned towards her, suspicion glittering in his beautiful blue eyes. "What do you mean, pray?"
"Don't ye remember my mentionin' I 'ad some preparations to make?"
"Yes." The suspicion in his gaze grew, and so did Amy's smile. "Why?"
"Well, even if it'll be only a quick visit, ye'll be goin' into the thick of da East End for real for yer first time, won't ye?" Amy grinned at him evilly. "Time to give ye a crash course."
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