The night is chilly and my light denim jacket is not cutting it. I am also not wearing the right shoes to walk in mud. The constant drizzle of autumn is falling upon us and my white Chucks are hating me for it.

"Why are we walking so far out?" I ask as I move a branch out of my face. I hold it back until Nate has passed by as well. We have been walking through what is known by the public as Lover's Land, an open grassy field that is surrounded by forest which can easily hide the canoodling bodies that inhabit it on Friday nights. I've never considered it a creepy place until tonight.

The moon is only a sliver in the sky, casting a shadow over the black painted scenery that is soon going to launch a homemade matchstick rocket. My stomach is in knots from the what-ifs of endless scenarios. I arrived to Nate's extra early to drive him here and watched carefully as they assembled it. Nothing seemed to be ammiss. I know what to look for.

"You don't want to start a forest fire, do you?" Molly answers solemnly, her heavy boots crunching leaves as she makes her way through the trees.

I stop which makes Nate bump into me. I reach beside me and steady him, ignoring his unneeded apology. "I thought you said no fire was going to be needed for this kind of rocket."

"Would you chill?" For some reason she finds my uneasiness funny. "It's just easier to see where it lands if we are in an open field. It's only another mile. Let's keep going."

I begin walking again with Nate trailing behind me. My hand mindlessly went from guiding him by his forearm to his right hand, my fingernails tickling the inside of his wrist while sliding down to clasp my hand over his. I look over at him while I do so and notice a visible shiver rack through him as my nails scrape across his sheet paper skin. I can practically feel it course into me and the feeling is indescribable; Like the moon grew ten times its size and now lit up the surrounding areas, the light source coming from me.

I smirk when he doesn't go to remove our clasping hands but then again he probably figures he shouldn't bite the hand that is feeding him. My excitement fades at the thought that he doesn't really want to hold my hand but is doing so because just that; he needed to be guided and nothing else. I let go of his hand as if he shocked me. His fingers grasp tightly around mine in panic before I moved them back to his forearm, dragging him out into the open field.

Once we are out in the open, Gavin and Trent hoot and holler like a pack of wolves. I can't help but be amused by this. They were now in their element. Even Nate takes a deep breath in and lets it out, his smile grows larger with each step we take. Oh, I want to hold his hand again.

Nate isn't an angry person but he isn't an overly excitable one either. He frowns more than he smiles, or looks more serious than playful in his daily routine. But there are times when he does smiles and it almost knocks me off my feet. It's like I am caught in the sunlight, gazing at it though I know my eyes will pay for it later because when I look away I am blinded by how beautiful it is.

He is smiling now. It is small but it is there and I can't help but stare. My fingertips remain on his taught forearm as I look up at him, mesmerized by the sight in front of me.

"Excited?" I ask, my voice barely recognizable to my own ears.

"Always." His husky voice is barely a whisper but a hint of curiosity and excitement lace through it with bravato.

"You'll stay back here with me, right?" I didn't want to get too close to the take off for obvious reasons and Nate knew this from our drive here. I had argued that the only way I was going to take him or even let him go was if he would stay as far away from it as possible. He didn't put up much of a fight which left me feeling relieved and better about all this considering I was a mess with anxiety.

He nods once, his face straight forward. I look for distaste in his features but there is none and for that I am grateful. Either he is good at hiding his emotions or he really doesn't mind being behind the scenes of the action.

I squeeze his arm tightly, trying to voice my gratitude that he is being so civil about all this. His head tilts down at me and one side of his mouth twitches up in another smile. I drag him down to sit beside me on the grass and watch as his friends rush towards the center of the large field to set up their creation.

I watch as they assemble the rocket. Their backs are to me and the sky is too dark for me to see much but the whole process makes me eery.

"Is the safety pin in the center?" Nate asks me like he actually believes that I can see this far away. "Because if it's not, then the whole launch will be ruined. It won't even get three feet off the ground."

I crane my neck but this proves to be useless because they are too far away. "It's in the center," I guess, really not knowing if this is true. Even if it gets three feet off the ground I will tell Nate it touched a star and came back to Earth because I want him to be pleased with what he built.

"And the tin foil is wrapped perfectly, no open spaces?"

"Yes, Nate. Everything is going to go as plan." I grin up at him in a lazy way. "It's going to be sweet."

"Sweet?" Nate muses, his tongue dotting out to wet his lips. "It's going to be epic."

My stare freezes on his lips but a flash of orange out of the corner of my eye tears my attention away. Was that fire? My heart beat speeds up. Yes, it was. Trent is scraping a match against the matchbox to light it. My whole body goes cold.

"I thought you said they weren't going to use fire?" I gasp standing up. Nate pulls me back down by gripping my fingers in his and this stuns me enough to allow him to station me back down by him.

"It's called a matchstick rocket, Kelly. How else are they going to get it off the ground?"

So they lied?

"It demonstrates Newton's third law of motion — that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Because the explosive force is aimed down toward the ground, the result in the reactions will fling the rocket high into the air. It's going to be awesome if it works how it's supposed to."

"And what will happen if it doesn't work how it's supposed to?" My voice is gruff, raw with fear of this whole hobby Nate has his friends seem to adore. Why couldn't they be math nerds or even better, enjoyed dungeons and dragons like the normal population.

Nate doesn't say anything and I sit there, my stomach flipping and my nerves bouncing off my cells. Please, I beg to myself, please let this go as planned.

"Are ya'll ready?" Trent yells from across the field.

I stay quiet, too afraid I would vomit if I opened my mouth. Nate shouts his confirmation beside me. I promised him a play by play but right now I just wanted to go home. Why would they lie and say there was going to be no fire needed for the take off. They did say that, didn't they? Or maybe I just imagined it because the thought of another mishap made my mind do crazy things.

Trent puts the lit match to the tail end of the rocket and Molly and Gavin speed backwards, hands vizing their eyes as they wait for takeoff.

Suddenly, as if a match was put to me too, excitement fills me. There is something mercurial about waiting for a takeoff. Chanting from ten fills the frigid air and I find myself counting down along with them. My breath shows smoke with every puff of air I breathe out.

Because I am already on edge and now the added anticipation of the rocket soaring into the sky, I grab Nate's hand again. I bring our conjoined hands into my lap and give it a little squeeze assimulating that I need the extra comfort. Nate is practically buzzing on his spot on the grass. He squeezes my hand back and waits for the loud pop of takeoff.

It's not as loud as I imagined it to be which would make sense with the smallness of the homemade rocket. I watch as it shoots off the ground and ascends into the air. But I only watch for a second because I glimpse over at Nate to see the rest of the take off mirroring in his raybans. A giant smile, the biggest I have ever seen grace his face, stretches from ear to ear, his pearly whites--straight and strong from years of braces--shine under the moonlight.

The launch only last a few seconds before it descends back to the ground. Trent and Molly, even Gavin, shout and whoop through the whole process. And I am in awe.

"That was amazing," I say mostly to myself, squeezing Nate's hand once again. Somehow we were both on our feet now but his hand is still in mine.

"What are the stats?" Nate shouts to his friends. Trent and Gavin are now trailing after the rocket, waiting for it to finally hit the ground. Molly jogs back towards us. Her smile can be seen from halfway across the field.

"New record!" As Molly reaches us her eyes flicker down to our intertwined hands. Her face falls and she looks strangely at Nate who is still beaming, not seeing the reaction. But I do.

"No way!" Nate's feet leave the ground for a second but my hold on his hand keeps him from going too far. "How high?"

I think I'm in shock. My happy bubble still cocoons me as I watch Trent and Gavin retrieve the rocket only to have my bubble popped when the "rocket" is now a ball of fire. My breathing speeds up as I watch Gavin take a fire extinguisher out of the backpack he is wearing and puts it out.

Molly's distressed expression soon turns exuberant when she take in my horror. "What did you think was going to happen, princess? A match has highly reactive phosphorus on the head. You are scientifically bound to get combustion."

The smell of gasoline raced through my nostrils and the fire dimes on the grass.

I roll my eyes and reluctantly let go of Nate's hand. As if he momentarily forgot that we were even holding hands in the first place, his fingers unclasped slowly, as if stretching his fingers would levitate my hand back in his. I don't think much on this because my mind is still a bright light of shock and excitement, shrilling loud and clear in my ears.

I leave Nate and Molly to talk specifics and run out towards the two boys high fiving. Trent smiles brightly at me as I approach them and Gavin even continues to laugh as if he is high from the fumes. These boys look like evil geniuses, their hair bushy and full and their eyes wild.

"What did you think?" The curly haired boy asks holding the burnt material in between his fingers. I inspect it from afar, my head cocked and eyes bright.

"Do you think we can do that again?" I find myself saying. My frown and worriment has burned into something carnal, something alive, and pure joy lights within me. The anticipation of the whole ordeal was something and to see it happen was something altogether.

Trent hoots again as he swings an arm around my shoulders. This would have shocked me a few weeks ago but it doesn't bother me now. I find myself grinning wider. He begins to guide me back to the top of the field all while explaining how next week they were going to work on something that would be out of this world. His words, not mine.

"Kelly here wants to see another round," Trent announces as we reach Nate and Molly. They have their heads together talking but their faces show that the conversation is not a light one.

"Everything okay?" I ask, automatically moving to Nate's side like the Earth rotating around the sun.

"Yes," Nate answers, his body turning towards mine. It is like we are on the same axis. He is the north pole and I am the south. One end is always connected to the other.

"Are you sure?" I direct mainly to him but my eyes are on Molly. She looks away and shuffles back to Gavin and Trent's side. Weird.

Nate nods and his hand intentionally ticks against mine. His pinky finger hooks with my own pinky and my breath hitches. My heartbeat spikes to amplified speed. His finger unhooks from mine in an instant and he clenches his hand into a fist and he brings it back to his side.

"Don't lie," I warn him light heartedly. My voice sounds breathy and affected just by a simple touch. Man I have it bad.

"Everything is fine. Are you ready to go?"

I eye him suspiciously and glance over at Molly who is watching us a few yards away. My eyes connect with hers for a beat before she disregards me by listening to her friends gush about how great the whole thing went.

"Sure." I take hold of the sleeve of his grey hoodie as if I'm afraid to touch him now in front of his friends. Because I am. Molly is now sending off a strange vibe that I didn't want to get into at this moment in time. The excitement of tonight's event, though short, was extremely thrilling and I want to hang onto that feeling for a while longer.

"Wait, you're not staying for another send off? We're going to do the annual Cola and soda rocks bit!" Trent whines. Gavin nods his head along with each word. Why won't he talk to me like the others do? I don't even bother to look over at Molly. What has changed within the hour? And why did she call me princess? That nickname irks me.

I look up at Nate only to see him shaking his head. I bite my lip and shrug at the boys. "Maybe next time."

Molly scoffs and walks back towards the center of the field, her hand dipping into the back of her own backpack to pull out another handmade invention.

I look around the circle hoping someone would fill me in but Gavin and Trent have already moved onto discussing the next set up and Nate looks like he is ready to bolt whether I would help him or not.

We head back to my car in silence, my hand intertwined with his. It is a comfortable feeling, Nate holding my hand. Though this is different. I am not holding his hand to simply hold his hand, but to make sure he doesn't trip over a tree root or into a hole.

When we reach the gravel road where my baby blue convertible is parked, our pace slows. I can't wrap my head around how the atmosphere has changed. Molly's facial expression said it all. She didn't like that I was there.

"Why doesn't Molly like me?" I ask glancing sideways at Nate as we walk.

"She doesn't not like you."

I raise my brows at him and give him a look, my pace slowing even more until I have us stopped. Our hands stay hooked together, the grip slacking but not letting go. I laugh dramatically and my eyes send skyward.

"Okay, fine" Nate grins innocently and the butterflies have returned. "It's not that she doesn't like you, she just doesn't..."

"Trust me?"

"Yeah."

I nod and sigh. What do I have to do to make these people believe me that I don't have an ulterior motive?

I let go of Nate's hand and move to open the passenger side door for him. I lean my weight against the opened door, the adrenaline of the rocket slowly draining out of me.

"She thinks it's strange that you have taken a liking towards me." Nate kicks at the rocks underneath us, his face lowered and shadowed.

"That's a horrible thing to say to a friend." In an instant all adrenaline is gone and I am left slumped over the car door.

"She's just looking out for me."

"Well tell her to mind her own business," I snap but the emphasis is directed towards Molly and her cat green eyes. Why is he defending her? Why can't he just take my word for it that I like him?

"I can't say I blame her."

Not this again.

I reshut the door angrily and the loud shut echoes through the air.

I launch myself at Nate.