Laney calls for the seventh time in an hour and I hit ignore again. I know I shouldn't. I know I should suck it up, talk to her, let her see Peyton and pray that P is in a terrible mood and scares Laney away.

I know Laney. I've known Laney since we were these awkward kids trying to navigate a relationship that meant way too much. This isn't her.

It's not like her to change her mind, she was always so sure of everything. She was positive that she didn't want the baby the second she found out she was pregnant and never swayed, not even for a second did she ever let herself imagine what it would be like to be a mom. So why now?

"You okay?" My co-worker, Mike, asks as I'm sitting in the break room staring at my phone. My hand is tangled in my hair that I really need to get cut, and my brain feels like it is ricocheting inside my skull. Luckily, after today I won't need to come back into the office for a while.

"Can I ask you something?"

"What's up?" Mike asks taking a seat next to me. He is only a couple years older than me and recently engaged, so I'm not sure he can even help.

"My ex-girlfriend came back."

"Peyton's mom?" He asks and I nod, "do you know what she wants?"

"No. I need to figure all of that out. But if she does want to be in Peyton's life I can't really stop her, can I?" I ask.

Mike is silent for a little bit, he looks like he is thinking this over, "I really don't think so. She's the mom and she has only been gone for what? A year?"

"Yeah."

"I think you might be better off doing what she wants than taking this to court. Obviously, I'm not a lawyer but I can ask Emily if you want, she can give you a call." Emily is his fiancé and she is a lawyer.

"I can't pay."

"She won't charge you for the call," He gives me a tight smile and leaves.

***

Laney is waiting in the driveway when I get home from work. She is always so shockingly pretty every time I see her. Her auburn hair and bright eyes, even when they are narrowed in anger towards me.

"I couldn't answer your calls at work," I say as soon as I step out of the car.

"You always have an answer," She smiles that fake smile she used to do when we were dating. The one that I used to think meant that everything was fine but I realized later on meant nothing was.

If this was two years ago I'd have another response to her and we'd fight and make up within a half hour, but everything changed. We are on this crumbling ground and I don't know which way to move without completely cracking the foundation.

"Finn, I'm ready to see Peyton now." She takes my hand in hers and I hate how familiar she feels. How just one touch can bring back the memories of everything I ever felt with her.

I'm silent as I unlock the door and walk in. Westlyn looks up from the couch she has a book in one hand and her long legs are tucked underneath her, her curls are wrapped up in a bun on the top of her head and her smile makes me smile. And then that smile vanishes when she sees Laney's hand wrapped in mine.

"P's sleeping. She's only been asleep for about a half hour," West says.

Laney laughs, I almost cover her mouth knowing whatever comes out of it will be pure venom, "she's the babysitter too? I hope you get paid extra for everything you do for Finn."

West just shakes her head, mutters something under her breath, and closes her book, "I'm gonna go."

"Wait," I take my hand out of Laney's and motion for Westlyn to follow me into my bedroom.

"Really, Finn? You can't wait until I'm gone?" Laney laughs again but this time it sounds forced and sort of sad.

I turn around and look at her, "Seriously, Laney, just shut the fuck up," I'm so calm I'm not even sure if what I said registers.

Westlyn sits on my bed and looks at me, waiting for me to make the first move. But I don't know what the first move to make is because I'm not exactly sure what we're doing and how this is going to work.

"I'm not ready for a relationship," is what comes out of my mouth. Westlyn's green eyes are wide as she stares at me, she is so quiet.

"I don't want one either. I thought we were just having fun," she says.

"Yeah, okay. Good." But for some reason hearing her say that this is just fun for her kind of hurts. It's not just fun for me. I just know I can't give her everything right now.

Westlyn grabs my hand and pulls me down next to her on the bed so we are facing each other, "what's going on?" She asks her thumb sliding over the top of my hand over and over. And damnit this doesn't feel like just fun.

"I think I have to let her in."

"Why?"

"I can't push her. She knows everything," I say and wish I hadn't. That answer can lead to questions I'm not ready to answer.

"What do you mean?" West asks removing her hand from mine and standing up, she begins pacing the room.

"You'll have to ask Maddy."

"What? Just talk to me, Finn."

"God, West. I want to. I can't go against Maddy." That's when I realize that I can never have anything more with West because I have never been honest with her. It has always been a lie or an omission or another form of the truth to keep someone else from getting hurt, I never cared about Westlyn in any of these situations. West and I can only be what we are because of me.

"You won't go against anyone! Maddy or Laney or me. Finn you need to figure out what you want to fight for. And I think Peyton should be at the top of that list." Westlyn's voice is soft but serious all wrapped together.

My heart pounds hard, my hands curl into fists, and for some reason I'm ready to fight now. Fight her.

"You don't understand anything," I speak slowly like I do when Maddy comes home obliterated, "Peyton is always first and Maddy will always be second and Laney is always going to be somewhere on that list too." I'm fucking lying again.

Westlyn nods her head and takes a deep breath because she knows that I meant to hurt her, "she's going to screw up your whole life again. She doesn't want Peyton, Finn. She wants you."