I heard my mother and sisters cry, along with my sisters in law. I tried to stop and swallow the sob that was forming on my mouth, but still,a few tears have fallen and I know from the start they didn't make it.

It's been months when the first news came to our town. We are not winning and we are losing some men. It means that a lot of the men died in the battle.

I wonder if he did too, but I still held on my hope.

I still held on that tiny little hope that he'll come back.

Alive.

I woke up with tears falling on my clothes and soaking up my shirt and pillow. I hug my pillow as I let them flow.

Everyday, every single day I was tormented by my nightmare only to know that it's my own memory, from the past. I was still hung up in the past that sometimes I fall into a daze and get tangled up in my own memory.

I hop off the bed and wash my face with cold water, brushing my teeth, I look at the mirror and find that I'm look much more presentable. Unlike what I look like after crying, with eyes so puffy and a red nose.

My mother knows about my nightmare everyday but I never tell her what it is.

Picking my slippers I change into sweatpants and a t-shirt. Going downstairs I smell bacon and pancakes.

Yum!

My favorite. Mom really knows how to make me feel better.

" I giggle at her, not really taking the words into my mind. Someone loves to be pamper too.

Our house is like any other house too. There are 3 bedrooms one for me and my sister and one for mom and dad. We also have 2 guest room and a balcony with a swing on it. Mother love to grow flowers so we have many plants in our backyard. In the attic is where I paint, you can see many paintings and photographs that I did in our house.

calling her nervously as I clench the Hem of my shirt.

Mom smiles at me knowingly. That blabber mouth. She must have told mom. Then I spilled the moments between me and him yesterday.

Mom tease me as I blush harder. I can't help it, just by reminiscing that memory, a smile grace's upon my lips.

cringing at the last word I said. Mom look horrified when I ask her that.

Mom explained. I eyed her suspiciously, but she just smiled at me comfortingly.

Mom asked excitingly as she means towards me with eyes full of anticipation. She's so happy that I finally met a guy that I like and tried to call him which is very unusual to her.

I nervously bite my upper lip as I worry about how I would tell my mom I don't know about him, I don't even know his name.

I never really know his name, both past and present.

my voice got weaker and weaker as I feel my mom narrow her eyes at me, her smile stiffened and turn into a frown.

Smiling weakly at her, I was met with a chop behind my head. I rub it and was going to return when I found my mom took my cellphone and was dialing someone. I was horrified at her action, mom found out what I was doing and sprang backwards to avoid me.

mom shout out.

We ran around the house and when I was near to get my phone back, it answers. Eyes bulging, nearly falling out I ask mom in a whispher.

I want to cry but I lack tears at that time. Mom just give me a thumbs up and left the room.

My hands were trembling a little bit as I placed my phone in my ear.

He knows that it's me. Surprised by that I take a breath and answer him.

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