Even Astrid knew she had been standing there too long, but she couldn't seem to pull herself away from the salad bar. Perhaps it was because she couldn't bear to walk back over to the table she had been watching for the last ten minutes, to hear Sophie and George's conversation in the flesh rather than just watching from afar - that or she was waiting to see if they'd bring out any apple slices, at least that's what she'd tell anybody who asked.

It shouldn't annoy her as much as it does.

She tells herself to calm down, to not take it so seriously, to not pit an imaginary claim on a boy that won't even tell his closest friends he knows her, let alone what they do together.

But still, in her mind, she was the only one that should be flirting with him, that she should be able to sit across from him or have his number without caring about how she got in that position. It was frustrating, really, having to explain herself or give up her seat simply because people assumed they'd hardly spoken, when in reality they'd spent nights doing nothing but speaking, with his arm wrapped around her and fingers dancing together in an unseen tango.

"No apples?"

A voice scared her out of her own thoughts, jumping and almost dropping her bowl - she probably would have if the owner of the voice hadn't been so close next to her that their arms were pressed together.

"They don't have any," she told the boy, recognising his voice in seconds.

"You love the apples here," George mussed, not realising the effect his small words had on her.

"I do..." she trailed off, replying for replying's sake rather than to continue the conversation, all at his wishes.

"So," he started, putting more tortilla chips into his bowl, "why is Sophie sitting in your seat?"

A laugh bubbled in her throat, shaking her head, a friendly gesture that was surly being scouted by certain eyes at the table.

"Because she asked me to swap," her eyes finally met his, deep brown eyes she saw almost daily that still mesmerised her. They were deep and swirled in odd patterns like she could fall right in and spend her life grasping at the edges to pull herself out.

"And why would she do that?" George stared right back, he'd once admitted to liking the colour of her eyes, despite seeing the green as yellow, he said it reminded him of flowers in a way that made him want to go outside more, she was still blushing about that comment even now.

"I don't know," she shrugged, looking back down to the dips, "maybe she wanted to get to know the mysterious GeorgeNotFound better" there was a quirk to her lip.

"Well, I can't blame her" he shot a smirk right back, teasing as his eyes shot down to her lips for not even a second, Astrid could have imagined it.

"Okay, Mr big shot," a roll of the eyes and short laugh left the shorter girl before she left towards the table, George trailing behind.

From then on the group continued as normal, Astrid and George in separate conversations. Astrid talked animatedly to Wilbur about his new music, something that Astrid was very interested in, they'd even played together a few times years ago, and George forced into an awkward conversation with Sophie, who spent most of the time trying to connect with him despite their opposite hobbies.

Even now and again Astrid would glance over to find George already looking at her, that or looking at his phone, or pretty much anything to not interact with the girl across from him.

Astrid did feel bad for Sophie, she wasn't a bad person, she hadn't purposely got between whatever it was the two had, she was simply shooting her shot - and missing horrendously. But Sophie was a strong-willed girl and Astrid was certain she wouldn't give up until there was absolutely no choice at all but to, she'd cycle through topic after topic until she found something they could connect on.

Which is what she seemed to do by the time their mains finally came to the table, Sophie and the brown-haired boy seemed to be in a none stop conversation about whatever it was they'd connected on, both laughing every few seconds, George doing most of the talking.

Astrid tried her best to ignore it, turning her body to be in another conversation but she still caught snippets from behind her, it was all too much, at one point. So she left for the toilet, a few minutes to calm down and rationalise was all she needed.

She stared in the mirror, rearranging her bangs to sit nicer on her face, smoother down her shirt, internally letting herself think she'd feel better if she looked more put together on the outside.

It wasn't her stake to claim, she knew that, she had told herself that thousands of times before in the presence of said man and alone in her room at stupid o'clock in the morning. She had to be more level-headed, Astrid told herself, George wasn't hers in any sense of the word.

He'd never even called her a friend, in front of anybody, not even her. Despite them spending more time together than she did with anybody else, it was all useless.

Finally, Astrid got herself together enough to walk back out, her mind wandering to happier times rather than the sad decline she was on recently, hardly noticing the conversations going on around her when she sat down, eyes on one thing and one thing only.

The bowl of apple slices sat on the table in front of her.

——————

Written: 16th July 2022

Published:17th July 2022