Remus woke up in an old building, clutching a gun to his chest. The unmistakable sound of zombies groaning was heard from outside.

Remus smirked. Now THIS was more like it. Remus could handle this. None of that lovey-dovey garbage that had been going on for the past few days.

"Fuck, we're surrounded." Was heard next to him. Remus turned, spotting the familiar face of Deceit. "We're going to die."

"We've handled worse. " He heard himself say with a shrug. Remus quickly decided that he was a badass in this dream.

"Can't argue with that." Deceit murmured, looking out the windows. "There's a whole horde of them. There's no going that way. I already checked the back, there's nothing but cliff that way. We're fucked."

"Death can't be so bad, I get to spend it with you." Remus turned a violent shade of red. He told himself to calm down, flirting didn't mean they were together in this one. Maybe Remus was the flirtatious type in this one?

Deceit chuckled, shaking his head. His chuckles turned into laughter. "God, I love you." Deceit told him in a shaky voice. Remus realized all at once that Deceit wasn't laughing, Deceit was crying. "This is really it. Oh God--we're really about to die!"

Remus didn't understand what the big deal was. They were safe as long as they stayed in the building. Sure the windows were exposed, but they could always find something to cover it up.

Then Remus realized all at once that Deceit said he loved him. He went scarlet and his brain couldn't form basic sentences anymore. He heard himself say something, most likely a form of encouragement.

What was it now? The fourth time Deceit had been the love interest in his dreams? That was normal.

"Well, we can stay in here and wait for our death like cowards or charge out there and shoot as many of them as we can before we die." Deceit said, shrugging. "The choice is yours."

"Why would you ask if you already knew the answer?" Remus heard himself ask. Deceit snorted.

"Before we do that, though." Deceit began, suddenly serious. He crashed his lips onto Remus', suprising the latter. Remus kissed back with fiery intensity, the Imagination forcing him to do so.

Deceit pulled away, smirking in satisfaction. "Well then, let's shoot some fucking zombies." And with that, Deceit kicked down the door.

The dream faded away, and Remus flopped on his side.

Was he dying? Maybe his subconscious was trying to make up for years worth of touch starvation by giving it to him now before he kicks the bucket.

That still didn't explain why it always had to be Deceit. Why not Virgil or Logan?

I mean, Remus wasn't complaining.

Remus scowled at his own thoughts. Of course he was complaining! Deceit was just a friend! A caring, handsome, sarcastic, mischievous, gentle--

Fuck.

Remus ran his hands through his hair. The idea was preposterous. Him? Have a crush on Deceit? Ha!

Remus didn't get crushes. That was Roman's thing. Remus was the bad guy, the bad guy doesn't get crushes.

Plus, Deceit was WAY out of his league.

Maybe this was just a product of him spending too much time with Deceit? Yeah! That must be it!

Remus silently vowed to avoid Deceit until his dreams went away. He would feel bad, but Deceit would do the same if he was in Remus' position.

He changed out of his pajamas and left his room. He usually bothered Deceit all day (since he was the least likely to maim him after awhile) but now he supposes he should bother Logan (since he was the SECOND least likely to maim him after awhile).

He rose up in Logan's bedroom. "Oh, LOGAAAAAN~!"

Logan didn't even look up from his book. "What do you want?"

"Always straight to business, aren't ya?" Remus giggled. "Well, I just wanted to hang out with my favorite side!"

"Falsehood, I am not even close to being your favorite." Logan turned the page, still not look at Remus.

"Aww, you caught me!" Remus twirled a shuriken around in his hands, smirking playfully. "I just wanted to hang out with someone, Lo-Lo."

"Hang out with Deceit."

"Not an option!"

"Why is that?" Logan asked, finally glancing up at Remus. Remus didn't answer, just plopped on Logan's bed and pretended not to hear him.

Logan sighed, closing his book. "What about Virgil?"

"You saw the mess you became when you went in there, imagine if I did!" Remus laughed. Logan frowned.

"Roman?"

"As if! He would make me go on one of his boring ass adventures. There's rarely any blood involved!" Remus scowled.

"Patton?!"

"You have a brain in there, Logic? You forget who you're talking to?" Remus snorted.

Logan sighed. "Please don't ruin any of my work." He said, getting out of his chair and heading over to his desk.

"Fine. You're no fun." Remus pouted.

He looked over Logan's shoulder as he worked. He seemed to be looking at a list of ideas.

"Are those from Ro-Ro?" Remus asked. Logan nodded, reading over them mechanically. "How does he come up with all of that shit?"

"He does a lot of brainstorming during his 'boring ass adventures'." Logan said.

"He needs some stupid adventure to come up with stuff? I can do that on the fly! Here, you want an idea?"

"I do not."

"For the next video Thomas should go to a gay strip club, have sex with one of them, and have a crisis the day after!" Remus clapped his hands in delight.

Logan stared at him. "You're upset."

"What?" Remus asked, bewildered.

"You could've made that worse, but you didn't. You're upset." Logan concluded.

"You're too perceptive, it's a total turnoff. Imagine someone telling you how long your dick is while they're sucking it. That's you." Remus rolled his eyes.

"I dislike that comparison greatly."

"Tough shit, I dislike you greatly but you don't see me complaining about it." Remus shrugged.

"Are you alright?" Logan asked.

"Nope! I'm all wrong!" Remus laughed. Logan sighed.

"If you say so."