on woke up the next day—or rather, that same morning—like the ghost of his former self. His brain tended to go apeshit buckwild and kicked into party mode at around two in the morning every night, so he always tried to get to bed by one at the latest (since it tended to take a copious amount of time and effort to fall asleep). And, considering Killua came back from work at three, Gon's brain was still alive, active, and obsessed by its newest recruit: Any And All Topics To Do With Killua Zoldyck.

"I can't believe he took me shopping," Gon whispered to himself several hours before he woke up, pacing his bedroom. He had all of the clothes laid out, folded neatly, and stacked into appropriate outfits.

Gon thought this very same thing the next morning when, upon opening his eyes, he lied facing the stacks of clothes. It was the first thing he saw that morning, and while it wasn't an unpleasant view, it certainly was alarming.

Killua had taken him shopping. Shopping! Him!

Gon sat up on the mattress, still bundled in a sleeping bag because he had been too disoriented the night before to properly make the bed. He scratched at his rumpled, black hair with a frown, a scowl, and a gruff grumble under his breath, saying, "Ridiculous."

He crawled out of bed, rolled across the wood floor, and picked up the first stack of clothes at his disposal. After properly dressing for the day, he made his way out of the room and acknowledged the fact that the kotatsu was empty, which meant that, at some point, Killua had woken up and went to sleep in his proper bed.

Gon yawned, taking the steps down to the main living space with light, albeit tired, feet. By then, it was well past the morning and going on noon, which meant that he needed to kick his ass into gear and get to class.

Gon wandered aimlessly to the bathroom door and pushed it open, blinking sleep out of his eyes. He rubbed at them as he reached for his toothbrush. He topped the bristles with toothpaste, dampened it under the faucet, and stuck it in his mouth.

There were some things that Morning Gon simply wasn't capable of dealing with. That morning, as Gon scrubbed his teeth squeaky clean whilst half-awake and bleary-eyed, he incountered something far beyond his current level of mental capacity. Something... mentally scarring, as some might say. And while some scars could be beared proudly, this one certainly wasn't inflicted during one of his finer moments.

Oblivious, Gon stood in front of the mirror and listened to the dreadful squeak of the shower door opening behind him.

He opened his eyes.

Through the fog in the mirror, he caught sight of a mop of messy, bleached hair blurring with the steam, visible just over Gon's shoulder. Gon's eyes flew open wide, all sleep gone when Killua looked up and stilled at the sight of Gon standing there, toothbrush hanging out of his mouth, and eyes stuck on the dewey texture of Killua's bare shoulders.

Gon didn't say a damn thing. Killua didn't say a damn thing. The silence was palpable, like the humidity in the bathroom clinging to Gon's rising hair folicles.

Gon spun around, hands scrambling for purchase on the edge of the sink that dug into his lower back. Killua stared at him like some poor animal caught in headlights.

DON'T LOOK! Gon's brain screamed, but he was already staring at It.

"Get out!" Killua screamed in a panic, cupping a hand over his bare crotch.

"Shit!" Gon shrieked when Killua grabbed for a shampoo bottle and slapped Gon across the neck with it. "Sweet Mother of God! Ah! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he cried, slidding out of the bathroom with his toothbrush in hand.

He hit the wall opposite the bathroom door at the same exact moment Killua slammed the bathroom door shut.

Gon had never felt the beat of his heart so prominently before in his life. Each thud felt like a rock against his ribcage as his brain ran in circles around Killua's flaccid penis.

Meanwhile, the shadow of Killua's feet beneath the door perfectly resembled him standing on the other side, his hands braced firmly on the bathroom door. His eyes were wide and wild and he distinctly felt the adrenaline in his system sucking the blood from his skull, leaving him terribly lightheaded.

Killua's shoulders slumped, gasping. Holy fuck, he thought.

Gon spat his toothpaste out in the kitchen sink and gave his mouth a quick rinse while he tried to calm down, well, everything. Fire alarms were going off in his skull. Angry villagers with pitchforks were marching a migraine through his brain. It was only a matter of time before the world ended.

When that was done, the bathroom door clicked open.

Gon's shoulders tensed. He refused to look, but in the reflection on the toaster, he watched Killua's figure glance through the foyer archway before stepping fully into view wearing nothing but a black towel around his waist.

JESUS CHRIST! Gon thought, scrambling for the faucet. He poured himself another glass and chugged it as Killua took the walk of shame to his bedroom and shut (and locked) his door.

The instant the door shut, Gon put an elbow to the counter and his head in his hands. "If I wasn't losing my mind before, I definitely am now," he thought aloud in a whisper, frantic eyes flitting across the counter. He glanced over his shoulder at Killua's door before shaking his head and deciding that he needed to leave now before he was stuck leaving at the same time as Killua.

Unfortunately, they both had that bright idea, so when Gon emerged dressed and sporting his backpack and sneakers, Killua did as well. They glanced at each other at the top of the steps before looking away. Killua stuck his hands in his pockets as Gon cleared his throat awkwardly and squeaked, "Morning."

"Morning," Killua said.

They took a moment of silence for the passing of their sanities.

Gon cleared his throat again. "Sorry. About..."

Killua looked to the ceiling with a sigh. "Don't. Say a word," he stressed, each word more painful than the last. He glanced at Gon, who looked at his feet and nodded, bashfully.

Gon, the little shithead, was wearing an outfit he bought from Forever 21 the day before. Of course, Killua reasoned, Freecss seemed like the type of guy who didn't bother washing his newly-purchased clothes.

Killua sucked in a deep breath and took a step towards the exit. Gon followed suit, but not until Killua said, "That outfit looks good."

Gon startled, eyes wide. He flattened a hand over his patterned button-up and stammered a quick, "Th-Thanks!" before bounding after Killua. He slowed at the front door, pulling out his keys as he said, "You, um, your—"

"Do me a favor and don't compliment me," Killua said. He glanced at Gon as he opened the front door. His eyes went down to Gon's shirt, pants, and shoes before meeting his eyes and saying, "I was complimenting the clothes, not you."

Killua turned away before he could see Gon's jaw drop through the floor and all the way to China. It took a severe amount of effort, strength, and willpower for Gon to shut his mouth. When he did, all that came out was a flustered, "I—! I wasn't going to compliment you!"

It wasn't Gon's brightest moment, by any means.

Despite that morning scare, Gon's energy levels were inconsistent that day and only continued to plummet on the drive to class. When he came to the theory lecture hall, he was dragging his feet and dreading seeing Killua again in any capacity. Still, he was forced to endure it that day and every day after.

As Gon settled in his seat, brain reduced to mush, he thought about Killua getting out of the shower that morning. Gon never thought to consider that the guy was fit, but holy shit, the guy had a six pack. An Honest To God Six Pack.

Truthfully, Gon had never seen one in person. For one, high school rules restricted him to the women's locker rooms, and for two, no guy in his high school was sporting anything but flat stomachs. They just didn't train that hard for, well, anything.

What the hell is Killua training for then? Gon thought, rubbing a hand over his throbbing forehead. Six packs, from what he understood, were goddamn difficult to acquire. Killua had to be visiting the gym on a daily basis to keep that up, which made Gon wonder even further. Killua was always working! How could he possibly make time for the gym?

"Maybe he's a fitness trainer," Gon whispered, eyes wide. No, that didn't make sense, he reasoned.

"Who's a fitness trainer?" Zushi's voice sounded beside him.

Gon startled as Zushi dropped his backpack off and collapsed into the seat next to Gon. "N-No one! I just—um, neighbor! Yeah, I've got a neighbor who's, like, super fit."

"Yum," Zushi hummed. "Like, bulky-fit or lean-fit?"

"Lean-fit," Gon decided, tapping a finger to his chin. "And he works really weird hours."

"How weird?"

"Night shift?"

"Maybe he's a night nurse."

Both Gon and Zushi startled with girlish screams at the sound of Knuckle behind them. Gon twisted around just as Knuckle jumped the seat next to him and dropped down.

Knuckle sighed and braced a hand on his knee, the other on the back of Gon's chair. "I mean, for home nurses. Patients that need round-the-clock care."

"Ooh, that's a good theory," Zushi said.

"Yeah, that is a good theory..." Gon hummed, only to shake his head. "Oh, no, that doesn't make sense. I'd be worried if he's a nurse."

"Why?"

"Because he seems..." Gon searched for the right word, humming the entire time. He pictured Killua eating out of a stranger's cabinet in the dead of night like a feral animal with reflective retinas that glowed in the dark. A dreadful shudder coursed down Gon's spine. "Chaotic neutral."

"I can't think of anything else. Maybe he works at a warehouse?"

"That's less cool," Knuckle chastised.

"It's an honest living," Zushi argued, and then Killua entered the room so everyone had to shut up. Killua entering the room was more effective than the professor, who had to audibly silence everyone before class could begin.

After class, it came to Gon's attention that he had plans that weekend. When he, Zushi, and Knuckle gathered together out in the hallway, Knuckle wrangled them all together and the three of them flocked to where Uvogin was waiting just outside of the lecture hall, arms crossed and back to the bricks.

Zushi immediately groaned, wiggling uncomfortably as Knuckle squished them all into a huddle and held Zushi fast to his side with his arms around Zushi's shoulders. Gon laughed as Knuckle wrapped an arm around him, and, likewise, Uvogin did the same.

"Alright, this is officially a Bros Meeting," Knuckle said.

"Gross, ew, no, let me leave now, I beg you," Zushi whined, writhing as Uvogin slapped an arm around Zushi's back to keep him in.

"Bros Meeting, dude! Bros only," Uvogin said. "What are you to us if not a Bro?"

Zushi groaned and mumbled, pouting, "Fine, I am a bro..."

"With more conviction!"

"I'm a Bro! There! I said it!" Zushi cried, fake-sobbing into Knuckle's shoulder as Uvogin chanted quietly, "One of us—one of us—one of us—" whilst parrying left and right and jostling the entire Bros Meeting to and fro. Gon couldn't stop laughing.

"Alright, here's the plan," Knuckle said, giving them all a shake. "First thing tomorrow, and by first thing I mean 8PM on the dot, we are going out dancing and partying 'cause my favorite band is in town and they're performing. I've already got five tickets so you four are coming with me."

"Alright, I'm in," Uvogin said.

"I'm in, too."

"This wasn't up for discussion, but I appreciate your affirmation," Knuckle said.

"What band?" Gon asked, and before Knuckle could tell him, Zushi was saying, "I'm not convinced."

"Fine. You're twisting my arm here—I'm relenting. The venue's a gay strip club," Knuckle said, and before Gon could retract his confirmation, Zushi shrieked, "Ooh! I am so in now!"

"Wh-What do you mean, a strip club?" Gon stammered, horrified. "I've never even been to a club before!"

"Oh, San Fran's got tons," Zushi insisted. "Usually we just go to the vanilla ones—like, the ones you're supposed to bring your straight friends to."

"But this is the real deal," Knuckle said.

Uvogin winced a little and gave Gon a reassuring pat on the back. "Trust me, we don't make a habit of going to strip clubs. My bank account couldn't take it."

"Are... you guys really into that sort of stuff?" Gon asked, eyebrow raised. As soon as he said it, the Bros Meeting started to fade. Knuckle gave Gon one last pat on the back and stepped ahead, and Uvogin followed. Gon's confidence shriveled up. Maybe he shouldn't have questioned it. He wanted to make friends, right? But he was only eighteen! Would he even be allowed at the club?

Zushi wrapped an arm around his shoulders and said, "Dude, don't worry about it! It's all about, like, empowerment and sexuality and watching guys get naked on poles. Well, mostly naked. They've always got those thongs on so it's not even, like, fully stripping. It's just sort of—Yeah, okay, I'll shut up now. But seriously, it's not a big deal."

Gon felt dizzy. "Aye yai yai, my aunt would have a hernia if she found out I went to a strip club," he said.

Zushi shrugged and said, "Get cash from an ATM today and she'll never put two-and-two together."

Gon sighed, rubbing a hand through his hair. Uvogin and Knuckle were fooling around on the lamp post a few paces ahead, trying to see who could hold themselves up by their bare arms the best. "I don't know... I gotta go grocery shopping this weekend so I can meal prep... This week took a lot out of me. You know I've been living off of Dominos Pizza all week?"

"No kidding. But I seriously doubt you'll be grocery shopping at eight tomorrow. Just get it done in the morning, cook on Sunday!"

Gon sighed and bregrudgingly admitted that he'd at least try it.

And, so, the following day Gon woke up at exactly three in the afternoon after spending the entire previous night binging a Netflix show whilst letting his stomach slowly combust its lining due to malnutrition. He felt like the dead and acted like it when he emerged from his bedroom groaning in agony.

Killua had spent that entire afternoon relaxing at the kotatsu sipping coffee when Gon burst in like that. He looked up and watched Gon slump to his knees at the top of the steps and collapse on his hands.

Killua refrained from asking if everything was okay and instead sipped his coffee. In the next instant, all his questions were answered.

"I didn't get to sleep until five," Gon groaned, collapsing onto his side. "I'm so hungry... and tired..."

"Then you shouldn't have gone to sleep at five in the morning," Killua said.

"And my friends want to go out dancing tonight, too..."

"I reiterate my previous statement," Killua hummed against the rim of his cup. When Gon didn't move, looking like a dead dog atop the living room stairs, Killua sighed and said, "There's coffee in the press."

"Oh, thank God," Gon said, dragging himself upright. Killua had never seen hair ascend like that before in his life, but there Gon was, with a thick head of black hair sticking straight up off the top of his head with little prompting.

As Gon pulled a mug from the cabinets, he sighed, shoulders and morals slumping. He pouted a little and glanced over his shoulder at Killua, who wasn't paying attention to him. Instead, Killua was on his computer, arms crossed beneath the kotatsu.

Gon sighed again, this time with more gusto, and gave it a little hint of desperation that prompted Killua to glance uneasily at him. Gon rubbed a finger idly on the countertop and sighed again.

Whatever. I guess I'll take the bait, Killua thought to himself. "What's the problem over there. You don't like my coffee?"

"I haven't even tried it yet," Gon pouted, sniffing a little.

Killua rolled his eyes. "Then what's the fucking issue."

Gon took his coffee with him to the kotatsu where he slumped dramatically to the floor and huffed, "It's just—I can't tell if I'm too prude or my friends are being too demanding of me."

What the fuck? Killua thought, raising an eyebrow at Gon. Gon needed no more prompting—he just kept going.

"We're going to a... a concert tonight and it's... at a place I've never been to before and it kinda makes me uncomfortable."

Killua blamed his numbness to the situation on his exposure, because his stupidity was showing through. "Then don't go."

"But—you don't get it. It's hard being a transfer student," Gon insisted. "Especially since I'm not in the dorms. And everyone's already got their friend groups! I jumped in late. I feel like I gotta do whatever they're doing to, like, stay relevant."

"Well, where's the venue?" Killua said, putting his coffee mug to his lips.

Gon sighed, looking out at the window as he said, wistfully, "It's at this strip club called The Phantom."

Killua started choking immediately.

"I know! My thoughts exactly!" Gon cried, frantic. "Do freshmen always go to strip clubs?"

Killua cleared his throat before coughing into his closed fist and holding it there to his lips, eyes closed. It took several moments for him to collect himself and rasp, "Fuck no, freshmen don't go to strip clubs."

Gon groaned dramatically all over again, slumping against the floor. "But all my freshmen friends are going! I mean, I don't have many friends, but still!"

Killua wished the ground would consume him then and there and free him from this conversation so he could get his shit in order. For one, this not only confirmed that people from his class would be there, but it also confirmed that his roommate would be at his place of work—while he was working. He wasn't sure which scenario was worse.

They were all equally damning.

Killua's brain was running down several tracks as he thought of a counter response to Gon. He needed the cash—he knew what strippers made at concerts and that shit was good money, enough for a deposit at a new place—so he really didn't want to bail on Chrollo tonight. So he could dig through his wig stash, maybe. He didn't have many and it would be easier to perform stunts in a wig that fit well. His longer wigs didn't really do it—they sometimes slipped when he wasn't rightside up—but a longer wig would cover his face more. Maybe he could convince Chrollo to let him do crazy makeup, or maybe even wear a mask? Maybe he could convince all of the dancers to wear masks so he wouldn't stand out—

"Say," Gon said, breaking Killua from his thoughts. "My friend's got five tickets and there's only four of us. Would you wanna come with?"

"I can't," Killua said.

"Oh. Working?"