I walked to the bedroom, drew the duvet closer and lied down the moment Abeer left, my eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.

"Aashi!" I heard Taira rush into the room and sit beside me on the bed. In the mayhem, it had slipped my mind that Taira had also been there. "I'm so sorry," I heard her mumble from beside me. I drew in a heavy breath and sat up on the bed.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for. Don't worry about me, you go home," I pinched the bridge of my nose to keep the headache at bay. Crying always made my head ache. It was going to be long night, and an even terrible morning.

"Aashi..." Taira spoke in such a tender voice that I felt like crying all over again. I inhaled, looked at her and smiled weakly.

"Its fine, Taira. Go home, uncle must be waiting for you."

"You sure you don't want me to stay?" She asked, her voice sweet with compassion. I wondered if I could be as tender as her someday.

Not in this lifetime, for sure.

Tender, sweet, caring, and yet strong in her way - that's what he needed. That's what everyone needs. That's what everyone's attracted to. Something I can't be. Something I haven't been all my life. My chest hurt more as I mulled that thought in my mind.

I shook my head and looked at Taira. "No, I'm sure I can manage. Go," I said with conviction, blinking my eyes dry. I was convinced she wouldn't listen to me and stay back, but something in my tone must have told her otherwise.

She nodded, and after gentling squeezing my hand, she left. I watched as the door closed behind Taira. I could have done with some company. I knew being alone wasn't exactly what I wanted. And yet I had asked her to go...

I wondered why. She was always perfect. She never embarrassed herself in the public, she never went out of line, she wasn't a spoilt brat either. She was kind. She was tender. She was beautiful. Capable of leading a company in the future - intelligent, smart, calm.

And on the other hand, me...

I forced the tears back to my eyes and cried my heart out. Crying over a guy had always felt stupid to me, but at this point, I didn't care anymore. I cried for Abeer, for Taira, for me.

After crying, screaming and being angry and dejected throughout the night, I had slipped into a dreamless sleep, only to wake up to a raging headache. My head pounded as I rubbed my eyes and looked in the mirror.

Swollen eyes, unkempt hair, torn pillows everywhere. My room looked a mess. Just like my life. I cleaned up my room and myself, making a strong, black tea for the first time in my life and gulping the bitter liquid down.

I looked at my phone and made my mind in an instant.

"Hello Aakash, good morning. Who was going to Mumbai for settling the legalities of the Alijah deal?...Yes, get me on it...I'm aware of that...please do what I have asked you to, Aakash. I'll talk to Mr. Chaudhary. Forward me the details...yes, thank you." I finished the call and strode to my room to get to work. I was aiming to get over with Chaudhary's call as soon as I could, appeal for a day's holiday to work on the project and fly off to Mumbai for the next two months.

It was a very convenient plan. The Alijah project was a two-month-long work in Mumbai, and that suited me just fine. It wasn't that important, but I was going to go anyways. I needed time away from Delhi. Away from Abeer.

He wouldn't magically disappear from the office, and I wasn't in the right mind to see him everyday. Let alone work.

Just then I heard my phone ring. "Aashi, how are you?" Taira's worry-laced voice greeted me. I sighed, my heart clenching at her worry.

"I'm fine Taira. Don't worry," I answered politely.

"Aashi...don't even try to lie to me. I tried to talk to dad about Abeer. Abeer can't be fired since its not directly related to the company in any case, plus dad has said a total 'no' to any kind of questioning as it would lead to controversy and scandal. It would be the right thing to do and yet we can't..."

"Taira, why would you even do such a thing?" I questioned her, shocked.

"Why, he hurt you! Played with your emotions! He deserves it," I heard Taira speak with conviction. I was stunned. I couldn't believe it was Taira saying this.

The ever sweet, giving Taira. I had forgotten her sense of righteousness was way too high.

"Taira...there's no need for that. It's not fair. Technically he was trying to do this to you, but that didn't happen. I didn't expect anything like this anyways. He is a good employee. If he was to be fired on any terms, it would only be on grounds of romantic involvement with a fellow colleague. And that would also mean..."

"I would never do that to you, Aashi," Taira answered quietly. "It isn't your fault that you fell in love. I don't even understand this clause of the rules. But since its there, we can't do anything."

"There's no need to do anything, Taira. I'm going to Mumbai anyways. For a project. Its a long one, probably two months. Its good, and..."

"But what after two months, Aashi? That's a temporary solution. Not a permanent one. How..."

"Taira," I called out indulgently. "Its not a bloody big thing, yaar! I'll be working on the project and after two months when I will come back, I'll be over all this. No need to be so dramatic about it. Nothing's that big that you can't focus on your work."

I heard her sigh from the other. "Why do you belittle your problems, Aashi?"

"Because there's nothing so big that has be taken so seriously. No one's dying, Taira. Everything's fine!" I stretched out, done with this conversation.

"Fine! Forget it. When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow," I answered, simultaneously working on pulling the clothes out from the cupboard.

"Does the project start from tomorrow?"

I sighed, throwing the clothes on the bed. "No. It starts next week. I thought I would take a week's leave and be with mamma papa. I haven't spent time with them in a while, you know."

"I know exactly, Aashi," Taira answered cryptically, which I ignored.

"Ok, I have a lot to do. Bye! I'll call you later," I muttered and hung up the phone.

I sat on the messed up bed heavily, thinking about the last 12 hours and what had changed in a jiffy.

For all the strength I had, I was a coward about seeing Abeer. I didn't have it in me to stride down the office foyer and find Abeer perched on his chair first thing in the morning. Or the way his freshly showered and combed hair would be a mess in less than an hour in the office. Or how he would tap the end of the pen on the desk whenever he was irritated at the people speaking something useless in an important meeting. Or...

I shook my head furiously, trying to get the thoughts away.

He did wrong. He played me. I left him, and I on my way to leave the city. End of story. I stood up from the bed and started packing.

My bags and my feelings.

--------------------------------

2 Months Later

There was one thing about Mumbai. It never threw things unexpectedly at me. Mumbai was...constant. The struggle was constant. The life of constant work and drop dead tiredness at night was constant. Like I said, Mumbai was home.

My mother had coddled me for the last two months, showering me with all the love and not-so-subtle hints of matrimony. My father had somehow joined the force. It was two against one. The odds weren't fair. But she didn't get much time to hound me, because I wasn't there at home. Early mornings and late nights had become routine.

My life was surrounded by work. I liked work. My parents had been worried about my dimmed personality and the hectic routine I had planned for myself, but I had assuaged their worries by putting it on the project I was working on and the double work I had to do due to my absence in Delhi.

My mother had not been happy about it. But she couldn't do anything. Two months had passed just like that. Working. Escaping the reality.

Abeer hadn't erased from my mind. No, he hadn't budged an inch from my mind. He had been there, all along, haunting my days and nights. Sometimes when I was done avoiding his thoughts and sat quietly to think about what had happened that night, questions took birth that I didn't have answers to.

I had always been practical. And somethings in the story just didn't make sense. If he had been after Taira, why didn't he lead me there? More importantly, if he had wanted Taira from the beginning, then why did he make me believe he had fallen in love with me?

He wasn't that much of an idiot to think he would be able to make Taira love him after he had broken my heart. Given his plans, he wasn't an idiot at all. Then why did he waste his energies over me?

And then the real question - why did he want to get back at Taira's father? He couldn't have faked it all along. Nobody can fake one's temperament to that extent.

And his actions reflected that he wasn't a violent person. Active aggression wasn't his thing. Revenge didn't feel like him.

And then another set of questions would pour in. Had I acted too dramatically? Had I done a mistake by refusing to listen to him? Had I been too impulsive?

Whenever I sat back and thought of it, the incident always struck out as hazy. Blurred. A mayhem. Full of confusion. It always led to more questions but no answers.

My project done in Mumbai, I was preparing to leave. To Bangalore first, because of a intra-company conference organized by Mr. Kapoor, Taira's father himself. Employees from branches all over India were going to attend the event.

I reckoned he would be there too. But there was no excuse to evade Bangalore. Taira was going to attend too, which was a blessing since I badly needed to talk to her. Perhaps having a face-to-face conversation would clear some air for me.

The HR team had also planned a stand up comedy show tomorrow.

I hoped it would cheer me up a bit. Things had been pretty drab or confusing for the past two months.

I needed humour in life.

Because the person who would humour me was gone in a jiffy, just like he had come.

---------------------

Confusion is a more sorrowful state then regret. Because you know what you regret, but you don't know what you are confused about. Its a very dangerous state, which can harm so many people in its wake.

Our heroine is confused and flying to Bangalore. We hope Bangalore gives her some answers.

-------------------